everything matters (when it matters to you)

responsibility does not matter but it does

 

“If it matters to you, it’s not stupid.”

 

=

via tea-storm

 


 

Ok.

 

This is about eliminating “that’s stupid” from our vocabulary. What inspired me to suggest this?

 

The quote above that I saw on tumblr.

 

What do I really believe about my ‘eliminating stupid’ idea? Well. Realistically … this suggestion has about as much chance as an ice cube in Hell.

 

However.

Conceptually … this suggestion has a lot of merit. Especially if you take it out of the external world and think about applying it internally – as in … with yourself.

 

So.

Let’s take a minute and talk about the internal aspect — the “me, myself & I are stupid” type shit we tell ourselves in our own heads. I would suggest that far too often we think something … and say ‘how could I be so stupid?’

But.

Most times it wasn’t stupid. Most times thinking about something is simply iterative. It gets you from point A to point B … and on and on and … well … you get it. It just gets you … ‘on.’ <as in ‘forward progress’>

perspective is everything

If it matters enough for you to have thought about it … well … it really does  matter.

And it is not stupid. Value is in the thinking.

 

Look.

Trying to put a value on an individual thought is not only a slippery slope … but … well … stupid.

 

Ok.

Better said? … Worthless.

 

I say that because the Truth is an individual thought can rarely be assessed in a non-contextual way. In and of itself it may look of little value … it may even look stupid <in the moment> but in the grander scheme of things each thought is smartly leading to real thinking <and a real thought>. And real thinking is where individual thoughts can be made or broken. And, frankly, where you – your mind and how you think about yourself – get made or broken.

But suffice it to say … everything matters if it matters to you.

 

Ok.

But let me go to the external context for a minute. Huh? … How often do we say ‘that’s stupid’ when someone says something?

hate everything

Alright … try this on for size.

 

We probably say it much less often than we think it. But does that make it any better?

 

Regardless.

Let me suggest … we think it a shitload of times.

 

Even if we are open minded, and being open minded, it is a knee jerk reaction <mentally>.

 

But.

Here is a Life truth you need to consider before you even think “biy, that’s stupid.”

Someone has chosen to speak a thought.

Someone has ‘braved’ the real world and opened their mind <and soul>.

 

So.

I would argue <and will> … if it matters … truly matters to that person … it is not stupid.

Additionally.

And we are stupid if we don’t think it matters.

Okay.

Maybe we aren’t stupid but rather displaying a fear or reluctance to make the effort to understand them.

Yup.

Fear they may be right <and we are wrong>.

Reluctance to change what we believe.

 

Therefore maybe WE are the stupid one.

Anyway … we just need to be more careful, or thoughtful, with regard to ‘that is stupid.’

 

I often believe this issue occurs because we have a habit of defining ‘smart’ in the wrong way. We judge smart on outcomes … and not process.

Yet.

Things are often not as they seem … people who seem to be doing something smart or stupid … may not be smart nor stupid.

Things, in a grander sense, are often not as they seem.

 

There is always more & changing information.

There is always more context to be gained.

There is often more to the story than what we initially hear.

being yourself find yourself

So … in order to not be stupid you need to be … well … smart … as in being smart means not avoiding thinking.

 

Being smart means thinking things through.

 

Being smart is trying to find the real answer not the first answer.

 

Being smart means trying to understand what matters and what doesn’t.

 

Being smart means not jumping to conclusions.

 

Being smart is thinking “I don’t know” or “I am not sure.”

 

What’s not being smart?  Saying ‘That’s stupid.’ Why? Because “that’s stupid”, more often than not, is typically a reflection, a sign, for stopped thinking.

 

Yup.

 

A stop sign for thinking.

 

Lastly.

If none of that really mattered to you … take a second and think about how the words ‘that is stupid’ taste in your mouth <or mind>.

 

If they are words you savor … well … you are the stupid one.

 

Ok.

Maybe you are just an egotistical asshole.

Or worse?

You are being a shithole to yourself <if it is words you say to yourself in your mind>.

 

If the ‘you are stupid’ words just don’t feel good … or taste very good when spoken?

Good.things that matter the most

 

And think about it.

 

In the end.

Everything matters if it matters to you.

 

And. If you truly believe that?

From here on out … assuming that what someone says, and thinks, matters to them will help you become smarter as you think about what they actually said <and why they said it> rather than simply rejecting it.

Yeah.

Simplistically … believing everything matters may actually make you a better person.

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Written by Bruce