expanders

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“Some of us get dipped in flat, some in satin, some in gloss….” He turned to me. “But every once in a while, you find someone who’s iridescent, and when you do, nothing will ever compare.”

–

Wendelin Van Draanen

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Well. Not all people who pass through our lives are the same. Some are shrinkers and some are expanders. Expanders are iridescent people. The special people who expand how you think about yourself, what you can do and just Life in general.

These people become your best friend. And I don’t mean best friend in the traditional sense. I mean as in one of the best people you can have enter your Life that may not be a true friend, but mentally they are the best friend your mind can ever have.

Sometimes they enter your life and stay.

Sometimes they just visit your life.

And sometimes you just glance off of them.

Doesn’t matter. Even a glimpse is often good enough.

A glimpse, a glance, a whatever connnectedness, gives us … hmmmmmmmmmmmmm … hope?

Why does it matter? Life is tough. I think everyone can agree on that. But sometimes having a ‘right person’ can remind you that you can gut it out through the tough times … and that maybe there is something more than the ‘gutting out.’

Maybe that’s the hope part.

And you know what? I’m not really focused on tough times. Special people in your lives don’t get you through tough times, heck, a lot of people can do that <more than you probably think>. I imagine I am more focused on ‘better than today.’ Or maybe even ‘better than I am today’ aspect of Life. Somehow this person shows you a different version of maybe what you perceive as the broken pieces of life. They seem to give you a slightly different perspective on Life … shit … sometimes maybe they give a hugely different perspective on Life. The size of the perspective is irrelevant. They simply show you a different one.

Somehow his new perspective you may glimpse seems a little lighter … brighter … better.

The weight of the world, and the weight of yourself <thoughts, doubts, etc.>, seem a little less in this place you see.

An iridescent person does this to you because they see what others don’t combined with an ability, sometimes even by doing nothing but being themselves, to understand what you are going through. And by ‘going through’ this isn’t about sadness or depression <although it could be> it is more just about wherever you are in Life.

In that time.

In that space.

In that moment.

You get a glimpse of another time, space and moment.

Somehow. In an instant … yeah … sometimes just an instant … without obviously doing so … they accept responsibility over you and bridge you from where you are to “what is possible” or “”what could be.”

In my mind … they permit you to have the conversations you never have.

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“Somewhere in the conversation we never have, lies an issue we never resolve.”

William Chapman

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Oftentimes these are the conversations we simply forget to have with ourselves.

We may avoid them … but I honestly don’t believe most of us do. We simply forget to have them.

These special people remind us of the conversation and they begin it. And, once again, sometimes they begin it in a real conversation and sometimes as they glance off of you and your Life they simply spark the conversation in your head.

The conversation?

“Better”.

Focused on Better stuff.

A better life, doing better … being a better person.

<note: this is ‘Hope’ for being better>

Now. What makes the special person obvious to us? <because I assume someone is going to send me some note about ‘thanks … you are right … how do we recognize them?>

We make space for them. They are expanders.

Huh? I cannot tell you how many times I have heard someone say … ‘I don’t have enough time’ … or ‘I miss so-and-so so much and should ……..’ But you know what? We always … ALWAYS … make space for those special people who make us think about being better.

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“We have plenty of room for people … in our lives, I mean. Especially the ones who make us be the people we want to be.”

Suzanne LaFleur

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Oh.

I forgot. There is another way to recognize the special people.

‘…. someone who’s iridescent, and when you do, nothing will ever compare.’

No reason for this post other than the fact I saw the quote I opened with and sat back and started thinking.

Some of us get dipped in flat paint.

Some of us get dipped in satin.

And some of us get dipped in gloss.

But the ones who are iridescent?

I have met a few.

Nothing compares.