Business Thoughts, Favorite Quotes, Life thoughts, Rants and Observations

leaders and their uncomfortable relationship with truth telling

===============

“Tired, tired with nothing, tired with everything, tired with the world’s weight he had never chosen to bear.”
―

F. Scott Fitzgerald

================

Well. I admit. I get in trouble with some of the ‘radical transparency people sometimes because I hesitate to agree that the most effective organization is an organization in which everyone knows everything.

Yes. I do believe every person is capable of leadership.

Yes. I believe every person actually does lead (contextually & situationally).

Yes. I believe if you want to encourage individual leadership within decision making you should, and have to, be as transparent from a leadership perspective as possible.

No. I do not believe you tell everyone everything.

Yes. This is where i get sideways with a lot people.

Here is a truth that many people do not like to hear.

This may sound obvious, but leaders do not always tell the truth.

This may not sound obvious, but leaders do this on purpose because not always telling the truth is sometimes, truthfully, the best & right thing to do. This leader can be in business or in the government or, frankly, any situation.

Now. I am not suggesting they always lie nor am I suggesting they do not know what the truth is <or how to tell it>, but I am suggesting that there are times & situations that we, the everyday schmuck, shouldn’t hear the truth.

Therein lies a leader’s uncomfortable relationship with truth and truth telling.

Leaders are often demanded to manage the narrative <not control it>.

Managing the narrative can be based on a variety of solid rationale points which may piss us every day schmucks off later on <when we inevitably learn the whole truth>, but within the context of how and what is happening the leader has actually done the right, and best, thing by not telling the whole truth.

Sorry.

That is the truth.

Look. Leaders have a shitload of responsibilities, but let me highlight two with regard to truth and truth telling:

– All people.

You lead all people not just one group or one department. You end up being very careful in what words you decide to attach to whatever you want to talk about.

No. This is not political correctness.

This is managing the overall effectiveness of the larger group. If a word, or group of words, disenfranchises a group from the rest of the organization or greater whole not only does the whole suffer but the smaller group can receive undeserved negativity.

All people.

The burden of responsibility that a leader bears is to all, not just parts of all.

– Moderation.

This may seem counter intuitive, but leaders spend much much more time tamping down excitement <to make it realistic> and tamping out fear <to make it less debilitating> then they do creating energy and ferve.

That doesn’t mean that they do not inspire the masses … just that the majority of their relationship with those they lead is more about rational and not emotional – the responsibility to temper emotions and emotional responses.
Moderation.

The burden of responsibility that a leader bears is to mitigate emotional responses.

So. These are responsibilities.

These are actually reflective of behavior intended for the greater good and not to hide something or any nefarious reason. It is solely in the best interest of the greater whole. And, yes, while we everyday schmucks bitch & moan about no one should be making decisions for us or a desire <or right> to being part of the decision … we really do not.

Mostly because while we all think we can be a leader … 99% of us cannot.

To be clear. The obligation to tell the truth is heightened depending on what one is proposing, yet, it always gets balanced by the obligation for the greater good. This is the truth telling balancing act, a high wire act most of the time, every leader walks — every day.

Which leads me to wanting to share a couple more truths. Uncomfortable truths.

Truth 1. Sometimes a leader gets it wrong.

Good intentions or not sometimes what you didn’t say, or even what you did say, will come back and bite you in the ass. And there isn’t shit you can do to explain why you did what you did. People tell you how to do your job. People call you a liar. People call you stupid. People call & tell you … well … a shitload of things that make you feel like shit.

But you know what? You are a leader. You forge on and do better the next time.

But. Let me be clear. Just because you get it wrong doesn’t mean you will automatically tell the whole truth every time from that point on. Leaders always … always … look at what they say in a contextual fashion. I will not tell the whole truth if emotions are running high and will incense to a state of irrational behavior. I will not tell the whole truth if it will drive further despair <when hope is needed>.

Truth 2. Even when you get it right … you can never tell anyone why you did it.

You can’t tell people that emotion makes rational people irrational and “I didn’t tell you everything so that emotions could ease”. I stubbornly didn’t say something, agree with something or use a particular word or phrase because, well, I wasn’t sure you would attack some other group of people <take out your emotions on someone>.

You are a leader. You carry the burden of what you did and take solace in the positive outcomes when you do get it right.

That’s it. This topic has been on my mind for quite some time.

Mostly because I believe we should think about this more often as we view our leaders <and see the uncomfortable amount of shit that our leaders get piled on them>. Partially because I believe in an autonomous democratized decision making organization model. Totally because business mostly exists in a hierarchy model and for the most part we need to manage the existence in which we live in.

Now. This is certainly not written to applaud lying. I do not condone blatant lying. But I do believe there is a time and a place to not tell the whole truth.

That is the burden a leader bears.

Now. Far far too many people think they either are a leader, as smart as a leader or could be a leader.

Harsh truth? The majority of people cannot be a <good> leader. And. Not everyone can or should become a leader.

It takes a certain type of skill, lots of character & courage and … well … the ability to say what needs to be said when it needs to be said. Sometimes what needs to be said is the whole truth and sometimes what needs to be said is selective truth.

This is the uncomfortable truth leaders know as … well … truth.

I imagine some o the thoughts I shared today will make some people uncomfortable let alone vehemently disagree with. That’s okay. All I ever ask is you think about it and maybe see this as an uncomfortable truth.

===

another thing I wrote about the Burden of Leadership

===

99% of us cannot, a certain pride in uncovering solutions to the complex lives we have created for ourselves, a cheap leadership trick from leaders, a combination of competency and chemistry, a derivative of the best, a flawed person with talent, a full life, a generation of concerned citizens, A leader is a dealer in hope, a Life truth, A throne is only a bench covered with velvet, accept the burdens with grace and character and intelligence, accountable decision making, achieving greatness, action and consequences, actions today make who i am tomorrow, admiration, advice is wisdom, advice leading to choices, advocate of independent command, affecting organization thru actions, affecting people’s conflict behavior, aiming high, aligning generational attitude and technology and consumer trends, alignment, alignment has dimensions, all go through the same process, all we could and should being, Alvin Toffler wrote in 1990, amoral or moral, an ability to avoid structural organizational corruption, an awesome business quote, An order that can be misunderstood will be understood, analysis paralysis, and therefore more precious, apply the same things they are doing, appreciation, architects of fate, as smart as a leader, aspects of the burden, assists readily, astonish people, at some point you are accountable, attitudes, attitudes and behavior, avoid the gray, balanced relationship, balancing dependence and independence, be able to decide, be ahead, be better than us, be still in midst of activity, be who you are, behavior, being a contrarian, Being a leader carries with it huge responsibility, being accountable, being contrarian, being decent is not your best, being enlightened, Being good isn't really about anyone noticing, being great takes work, being part of the decision, being perfect is impossible, being scared as a leader, being smart and tough, being soft in business, being successful, believe, best advice, best advice people, best solutions are often the ideas that are immediately obvious, best thing by not telling the whole truth, black or white, blurry responsibility, bookending alignment, booker washington, brand, brand ambassadors, branding, brilliant in simplicity, builders versus renovators, building a culture, building character, burden of responsibility that a leader bears, business, business character, Business Thoughts, can never tell anyone why you did it, cannot be happy and scared, capacity of the human mind, careers, centralized focus with decentralized implementation, change, change agents, change begins in the head, change forces prioritizing, change is easier if you simplify, change is scary, change takes remarkable effort, changed behavior, changing objectives to make change, character, choice between alternatives, choice cannot be made with statistics alone, choices, choices leading to full life, choices we make or do not make, choosing to be true, choosing to play the game your own way, clear on his expectations, clear responsibility, clients, cognitive thinking, collector of moments, combination of individual morality as well as organizational morality, coming to grips with inadequacies, committment, common sense in business, communication, community individualism, company of adventurers, complex character, complex simplified, complexity equals value, Complexity is a destructive path, complexity often hides within some bright shiny object, condoning mediocrity, conflict and people, confronted with a clear choice between right and wrong, connection to the silent life of things, consistency, consistency of character, consistency of character is underrated, consistency of values, consumer buying process, consumers not driving everything, contradictions of life, controlled autonomy, conversations, core competency, corporate values, cowardly decision making, creating desired behavior, creating positive touchpoints, creating the next generation of thinkers using the web, creation means destroying something, cruelty and retribution, curiosity is the enemy of ignorance, cynicism, dangers and risk tangled in every life decision, dealers in hope, dealing with extenuating experiences, deceiving yourself, decentralizing communications tasks, decide what your best is, decision making, decision making under uncertainty, decision responsibility, decision utility, defining happiness in moments, depth of character to face everyday life, depths of despair, desired, developing minds of next generation of thinkers, developing social and emotional competencies, different world with different rules, differentiation, difficult lessons, difficult to discern good guys from bad guys, difficult to manage expectations, disappointment created by expectations, disappointment in yourself, discern the difference between desire and need, Discerning between desire for speed and need for speed, discerning the important from the unimportant, discipline but freedom, disciplined chaos, discovery, discovery is messy, distinguishing right versus wrong in your own head, do not fear the event, do not go gentle, do not go quietly, do what is right, do your best, does not become more valuable because it becomes complicated, doing, doing a decent job day to day, doing great things, doing right even though it may be wrong, doing the best they can, doing the right thing, doing the right thing is hard, Doing the right thing isn’t always clear, doing the right thing takes work, doing the right thing versus pleasing, doing what is right, don’t apply one iota of that knowledge to their business development program, doubt, doubt resides between certainty and uncertainty, doubt something, doubt something once unquestionable, doubts of words, drucker as a futurist, drucker new realities, Drucker’s New Realities in 1990, dynamic beyond our own purposes, economic power structures were changing on the cusp of the computer age, education to enlighten, eliminating the unimportant, embellishment, embodies contradictions, Embracing fragmented knowledge while empowering it, emotional, employees, employees running scared is bad, Employers are getting better at squeezing, encouraging, encouraging curiosity, encouraging understanding of choices, endless in-between, energy, enhances the quality of the decision, enlightened business, enlightened business thinking, enlightened conflict, enlightened decisions, enlightened leadership, enlightened learning, enlightened life, enlightened management, enlightened managers, enlightened people, enlightened quote, enlightened quotes, enlightened thinking, enlightened time, Even compensation is becoming more short term, events are meant to be commanded not feared, every minute is another chance, every moment counts, every one is an architect of life, every one plays a role in fate, everyday schmuck shouldn’t hear the truth, everyday schmucks bitch & moan, excellence, excellent delegaters, Expectations gain momentum with time, expounding on living a life in the now, external people get confused, extreme situations demand extreme solutions, facing overwhelming responsibilities, facts and truth, failure of imagination, fairness, falling short of best, Favorite Quotes, fear, fear of choices, fear of less than perfect, fear saps energy, fearlessness, few words, fighting for what you believe in, find self-value in problem solivng, finding both comfort and newness, finding the right words to say, finding time, Finding time to do the things over, finding what is possible from impossible, finding your way is tough, focus on what is important, follow the truth, following, fragmentation, free your mind, freedom of, freedom of choice, friends and advice, friends leading following and side by side, friendship, fun, functional, functional superiority, fundamental feature of a successful company is, gaining new customers, generation gap is bigger than ever before, generation of measurement, generational ideation, generational things, generations, generations changing behavior, getting a new start means destroying some old things, getting ahead, getting ahead doesn’t mean being ahead all the time, Getting Ahead means Being Ahead, getting done what can be done great, giving hope in the face of fear, going with your gut, good advice is priceless, good decision making, Good leaders appreciate the value of this business stamina, good people, great leaders don’t respond, great listeners, Great management lessons., great organizations, great work, greatest danger is aiming too low, Greatness be nothing unless it be lasting, grounded in what is important, growth, guilt and obligation, guilty of not my problem, happiness, hard choices, hard decisions, have to contribute some new thinking, having a desire to add complexity to a beautiful simple idea has nothing to do with the idea but rather with the person, heightening value in life choices, hiding behind statistics, hope, hope in learning, hope is important, how leaders inspire action, Huge advocate of independent command, I can’t gain time or free time, I did the best given what I had, I think opinions, i want you to be better, if i only had time, If only it were all this simple, ignorance, ignorance is the enemy, imagination, importance of communication in leadership, impossible for leaders to lead in a traditional way, in a contextual fashion, In between where you were and where you will be, In the one life that we've got, inability to manage expectations, inaction, incentives, incompetence, incompetent managers, increased expectations, independence to act depending on the situation, individuals and institutions either adapt to, influencers are still influencers, informing a decision, innovation is impossible to budget, inside out leader faces a variety of challenges, inside out leadership, Inside out leadership leads to minimizing ambiguity, inside people there is a lot of stuff, instinctively complicates life, intentions, interesting people have contradictions, is anything back or white anymore, is your best just mediocre, isolating variables using statistics, it is not an easy discussion, it isn’t process it is the work, judgement, judgment is not easy, juggling versus balancing, just going to leap into some sort of glorious new age is very unrealistic, just this once, keep your mind open to solutions, knowing what is right is not enough, knowledge as wealth, lack of focus and wasted energy, lack of responsibility, lacking hope, lacking sophistication or good sense and intelligence, lazy decision making, lead all people not just one group, lead from the inside out, leader is a dealer in hope, leaders and their uncomfortable relationship with truth telling, leaders are still and active, leaders do not always tell the truth, Leaders have a shitload of responsibilities, leaders have strength of character, leadership, leadership split, Leadership will be defined by the inside aspect of businesses, leading, learning, left free, less important to do things first then to do things right, less than perfect, less than zero, lessons, lethargy bordering on sloth remains the cornerstone, letting go is difficult, letting go is not simple, lies, life, life challenges, life decisions, life is a struggle, life is about making choices, life is complex, life is not a mission, life is not a straight line, life is often not lived best gently, life is tough, life lessons, life not defined by meeting objectives, life thoughts, life’s white lies, linking intentions to reality, listening, listening to choices, live life to the fullest, living life backwards but still question, logic, logical decision making, maintain autonomy, maintaining relevance globally, making changes personally, making choices, making hard decisions, making the hard choice, making the simple complicated, making your own decisions, management, management by exception, managers, managing change is tricky, managing perceptions, Managing perceptions of how you are getting the shit done, managing the event to the extent, Managing the narrative, managing the overall effectiveness of the larger group, managing time, managing transitional moments, marketing, may seem counter intuitive, maybe life is not that complicated, measurement of failure, measuring generational attitudes, measuring generational behavior, measuring life, meeting the challenges of concentration, messaging, midst of change leaders kind of make it up as they go, miss the simplicity in life, missing out on what life has to offer, mitigate emotional response, mix of extraordinary genius and naive incompetence, moments are like a balance sheet, moral compass and doing the right thing, moral fiber, most people cannot recognize simple solutions, most things in life are not black or white, motivated by a desire to achieve, motivation, Napoleon, napoleon and business, napoleon quotes, napoleon thinking, Nelson, never a good ingredient in the formula for happiness, no formulas nor are there any checklists, no need to make up something new, no one wants to trust chaos, no substitute for judgment, nobody’s life is perfect, not always telling the truth, not everyone can give good advice, Not everyone can or should become a leader, not meeting an objective is not failure, nothing beats experience, Nothing is more difficult, numbers are not accountable, numbers can play a role, numbers show possibilities, numbers will confess anything, obligation to do, obligation to do the right thing, obsessed with time and maximizing it, odds are you are not unique, old but not old, older experienced people who know how to transform. experienced but flexible, once doubt enters it takes on huge proportions, one foot in history one foot in future, one of the smartest simplest things I have ever written, one step at a time, only few find the way, ordinary people don’t think they are remarkable, organization not aligned, organizational, organizational behavior, organizational change, organizations, Organizations will slow to think, our obsession with time, overcoming optimism, Part of the burden is decisions, peak moments of clarity, peer pressure makes any time wasting, people confuse process and disciplined thinking, people get confused about simple, people who give best advice have been through the most, people with more wisdom. people who have experienced more, people won't be sure that you have done anything at all, perfection procrastination, performance, personal creative destruction, personal thoughts, perspective can help with the complex, Pick your moments, piss us every day schmucks off later on, power of words, powerful words, predictions, pressure to maximize time is actually leading to minimizing time, prioritizing actions, prioritizing what is right or wrong, process, process is a means to an end, procrastination, procrastinators, Procrastinators get a bad rap, procrastinators have a tough life these days, productivity, providing perspective, prudent growth strategies, purposeful fragmentation, pursuing the way, putting pressure on yourself with to-do lists, quality of being simple or uncombined, quality versus quantity online, questioning the unquestionable, quite surprised to see how often common sense, quotations, quotes, randomness of life, rare to make complicated simple, reach for the stars, reason to believe, reflective of behavior intended, regrets, relationships, research, resilience, resiliency, resiliency and character, respect, respect for individual choice, respect the burden of leadership, respect the military, responsibility, Resting is rarely an option for leaders, restless consistency, right but wrong, right is right, risk, risk aversion, rocky road is more interesting, safe, say it is happening when it isn’t, Say something meaningful in an interesting way, say thanks and get a shrug, say that something is happening when it is, saying it is fine when it is not, saying the right words, scared, seamlessly step into, see within the circumstances, see your own reality, seek every way possible to complicate our lives, seek out events without fear, seek truth, seeking the way of truth, self doubt, self truth, shades of gray, sharing experiences, shitload of things that make you feel like shit, short term concentration capabilities, showing the way, silly expectations, simple, simple is hard, simple isn’t the least, simple solutions are often the best solutions, simplicity, simplicity has gone the way of the dodo, simplicity in life, simplicity is an acquired taste, simplicity of solution, simplicity seems too chaotic, simplicity takes remarkable effort, simplifying to make choices easier, simply a different Life skill, simply meandering, six impossible things before breakfast, slippery slope, slippery slope of despair, slowing down actually makes us more ethical, small gestures in trivial looking moments, smaller group can receive undeserved negativity, smallest actions contribute, So much of modern life seems to be about more, so much to do I can barely keep my head above water, so what do we do, soft choices, some wars are worth fighting, something to think about, Sometimes a leader gets it wrong, somewhere above the least and significantly below the most, sorting out the truth, speak after listening, speaking, standing on the uncertainty pedestal, statistical decision theory, statistics, statistics cannot make the decision for you, statistics getting in the way of a good decision, stay or go, stimulus, straight lines, straight lines are rare in life, strategy, strength of character to make change, stressful decisions, strip away the undoable and identify the doable, struggle between energy and indolence, struggle between vitality and decay, struggle to think of anything more miserable than, struggled to adapt to the change, stuck someplace that isn’t moving toward where, Stuff I Like, swallowing nonsense, take out your emotions on someone, takes focus, talking, tamping down excitement, than to be able to decide, that i will be tomorrow, that which is simple is valuable, the answers are within you, the art of procrastinating, the entire process was seen as either sequential or isolated, the more powerful will be the smaller players, the most powerful weapon in life is not a mission, the numbers told me what to do, the odd moment of beauty where time is not the same, the rocky road is the high road, the same process and same vocabulary, the Time versus Expectations continuum, the uncomfortable truth leaders know, the unimportant, the world is always changing, there is no formula for good choices, These are responsibilities, think about it, think about this more often as we view our leaders, thinking, thinking impossible things, thinking is good, thinking too much, this i am today, This is not political correctness, this sounds pretty common sense, thoughtful and relevant, thoughts, thrive on dreams and possibilities, throne is only a bench covered with velvet, time, time is a disposable product, Time is the new Currency, time management, Time pressure enhances the odds someone will make a less ethical, time research, time wasters, tired with everything, tired with nothing, tired with the world’s weight, to be sure of you, Toffler as a futurist, Toffler’s Powershift in 1991, too many people think they either are a leader, tough decisions are tough, transactional branding, transformational people, transparent from a leadership perspective, trapped by fear, treat people fairly, tries to create dissatisfaction, trivial moments, trivial moments in bigger life, true friend, trust, trust & integrity tied to its purpose, truth, truth and expectations, truth goggles, truth is rarely simple, truth is what really happened, truth or lies, truth or nothing, Trying to make them unhappy is difficult, Two charismatic leaders who didn’t fear the event, uncertainty is a bitch, uncertainty takes on geometric proportions, uncomfortable relationship with truth telling, uncomfortable truth, unexpected innovation, unquestionable, unrealistic expectations, unreasonable, unshakeable, until we meet again, use your imagination, utilizing time efficiency models to squeeze every productive minute, vibrantly alive in repose, vision, walk in our footsteps, walking beyond our own footsteps, want to be doing something purposeful for someone, wanting more can help us grow in many ways, wasted energy worrying, we actually waste a shitload of time, we all have the same amount of time, we invest so much time trying to manage time, what could be, what do you do when you get what you want, what I know opinions, What if life is made up primarily of the in between, What if that is all there is, what is right and what is wrong, what is the place of words, what of the wretched hollow, what we are seeking explanations, what would you sacrifice to win, what you elect to do with it, what’s next, When you do things right, words, words reflecting experiences, words that become deeds, words worse than nothing unless they do something, you can solve that kind of problem, you cannot dwell on every moment that slipped by, You forge on and do better the next time, your best member of your team has the energy and focus

November 13, 2019 by Bruce

Written by Bruce

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

leaders and their uncomfortable relationship with truth telling

Related Posts

Leave a Comment

Meta

leaders and their uncomfortable relationship with truth telling

Share this:

Related Posts

defined by spectacular consistency & spectacular errors

contrarian customer-centric thoughts

homeless

Leave a Comment

Meta