Oh, those funny Europeans – French, Germans, Greeks

I think it is difficult for us Americans to truly understand country-to-country tension. (well. unless the fact we despise that Canada has better beer and have disdain for their overall happiness). Oh, and I don’t mean like an Al Qaeda type thing. I am talking about that disdainful relationship borne of time.

We may understand fear on one hand (think Soviet Union in 50’s). Maybe we understand that. But emotional hatred/tension I am not so sure because, once again, it only comes with time and some good ole cultural conflict.

What I mean is that centuries old baked in emotional despising between Germany, France, Russia and England. That mutual suspicion that is an underlying thread in the fabric of everything Europe does. And in particular France and England. Even today it raises its head.

The channel isn’t wide enough.

I had to chuckle when I read that within the European Union a few years ago a Britain permanent EU representation invited their diplomats to craft a mission statement for their work.

One submission (not used) was “sticking it to the French, every day.”

Awesome. You figure it’s been almost 200 years since they fought in a war. (ok. So they had been warring off and on almost 500 years before that but c’mon get past it). So 200 years and that channel isn’t wide enough to buffer the disdain the English has for the French.

Stick it to the French. From a diplomat. Awesome.

Next. Germans tell the Greeks “get up earlier.”

Right now all of the European Union is kinda grumpy with Greece as they ran up a debt that, well, they cannot pay.

So. The Germans stepped up to the plate to tell Greece what to do.

First. Sell islands to pay off its debts. Good stuff. Anybody in the market for a Greek isle?

Next.  Two German politicians told Greece to sell historic buildings and artworks before receiving aid (anyone interested in the Acropolis as a summer chalet?)

Lastly. The German tabloid Bild wrote an open letter to the Greek Prime Minister George Papandreou:

Dear prime minister,

If you’re reading this, you’ve entered a country different from yours. You’re in Germany.

Here, people work until they are 67 and there is no 14th-month salary for civil servants. Here, nobody needs to pay a €1,000 bribe to get a hospital bed in time.

Our petrol stations have cash registers, taxi drivers give receipts and farmers don’t swindle EU subsidies with millions of non-existent olive trees.

Germany also has high debts but we can settle them. That’s because we get up early and work all day.

We want to be friends with the Greeks. That’s why since joining the euro, Germany has given your country €50bn.

Sincerely, Germany.

Basically the Germans are suggesting “lay off the ouzo and maybe work a little harder.”

Awesome advice.

Oh. Those wacky Europeans.