Enlightened Conflict

life is too short to be angry with yourself for being human

October 8th, 2016




“Some days you just have to say ‘fuck it, I did what I could today’ and just let go of all the stuff you wanted to do.

Life is too short to be angry with yourself for being human. “



(via thissadghost)


“Compassion directed toward oneself is true humility.”


Simone Weil



“Honestly, you just take a deep breath and say fuck it.”


Johnny Knoxvill



tug of war jonothan marsh

Perfection, or the pursuit of perfection, may be one of the biggest mental challenges that anyone – business or in Life – we face psychologically.



It is a tug of war mind game between wanting to do your best and measuring what your best looked like. this tug of war brings out the absolute fucking worst in managers. Leaders, businesses and individuals.

Suffice it to say … this is the absolute worst game in Life & business.


While I think about this often, as I think most people do, I can say it reared its truly ugly head again as I read a sadly insipid article on Ted Ideas written in some pseudo intellectual vein with regard to cause & affect <in that a negative action will have negative ripples you are responsible for … even if it is not immediate> and that more people should do and think positive thoughts because it causes more positive ‘effects’ <ripples> which you will also be responsible for.


Yeah … the ‘net net’ is be positive and you will be responsible for positive things.




That is certainly … bullshit.


Our actions ripple.


And the whole idea that if we have a positive intent and think positive thoughts that all the ripples will impact people positively is … well … absurd. Maybe even a little nuts.


Many of our actions do not have an immediate effect.


And, frankly, encouraging people to invest gobs of energy suggesting ‘positive intent has some positive affect you cannot even imagine’ makes the whole pursuit of perfection take on an additional level of absurdity <which will inevitably only encourage non positive thoughts with regard to self and peals of laughter in hallways of businesses around the world>.



I am all for being positive.

And I am absolutely all for positive intent.


Unfortunately Life and business is more likely to judge me on … well … outcome.


So encouraging people to think that approaching everything positively means you need not worry or even think twice about the action you took ,or are about to take, is stupid.


This absolutely crazy article blamed a systemic lack of awareness with regard to action & reaction as the reason they … well … “we want you to know, that we are all being affected by these actions, whether it is you who has made the decision or not, because the actions that they take are so negative, the reactions will be extremely negative and far reaching. You will be affected, directly.”


Good god almighty. People actually believe this crap?


Negativity and negative reactions are far more likely to occur if you have a smile on your face and say positive things and take a stupid action which creates a bad affect.


It is absolutely correct to state that every action, no matter how small, has an effect.

It is absolutely correct to state that the effect may not be immediate <but inevitable>.


But, as with everything, not all actions – little or small — are created equal.


And this is where that whole fucking perfection comes into play.

Pursuit of perfection more often than not adds on a layer of ‘fear’ to choices <and the inevitable actions>.


I would suggest that how we manage our ‘fear choices’ have a larger impact in general as they ripple out.

I say this because our fear choices can often represent the best, and the worst, in us from a behavior standpoint, a character standpoint and even a skill standpoint.


I will also suggest that attaching “be positive” to “fear choices/moments’ is a task of fools.




Pursuit of perfection, even if you are absurdly positive, makes the effect of your action almost one big frickin’ lottery.


Suffice it to say that even the most well thought mature choices may go awry.


That doesn’t make you any less perfect.

That doesn’t make you any less positive <or more negative>.

That simply makes you human.


You control what you can and recognize that most of it all is out of your control.damage-control




You make your choices.

You endure the consequences.

You move on.


Life is too short to be angry with yourself for being human.

Enlightened Conflict