Enlightened Conflict

forgot to be happy

October 12th, 2013

“I was so upset, I forgot to be happy.” – Eeyore, Winnie the Poohforgot to be happy




Dwelling on the crap on our life is easy … too easy in fact.


It is one of life’s slipperiest slopes.


All the while in doing so it stops us from being happy.

Even trickier?


Once on the slippery slope … even if you say in your head “brain … stop thinking this way’ … and you do actually stop … well … its hard to climb back up the slope.


I sometimes think just one person … or someone alone … can’t get off the slippery slope.


I admit.

I am not sure about that.


But. Forgetting to be happy isn’t about unlearning something or even <most of the time> learning anything new. It is really simple … you have just forgotten. I imagine I am simply suggesting that you need someone else to remind you.




If you think about this topic that way … we see a boat load of people every day who have simply forgotten to be happy.


You don’t have to ‘bring sunshine to their day’ or be one of those ‘everything in the world is good so why are you unhappy’ type people or anyone with some wacky exuberant Pollyannish view of Life.


You simply have to pull the person off the slippery slope onto some solid flat ground.


That’s it.

No more … no less.


Just remind yourself that sometimes small actions can contribute to bigger things.


Because … as Eeyore suggests … sometimes we just forget to be happy.


happiness_by_wint3r88I know.

It sounds silly.


But it is true.


And I will end by giving another Winnie the Pooh thought on how to remind someone to be happy:


“You are braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.”  – Christopher Robin


Pretty wise for a kid.

Nice pep talk for someone on the slope who has forgotten to be happy.


May 1st, 2010

pooh looking

“Rivers know this: there is no hurry. We shall get there someday.”
Winnie the Pooh

While Pooh is attributed to this quote I actually believe I have seen versions of it in Confucius or Buddhism writings (of course this Pooh quote can be found in the book The Tao of Pooh so maybe that is where the link is).

I just finished reading a difficult complex read but a really fun read … a novel called “The Godfather of Katmandu.” It is interspersed with Tibetan Buddhism thinking from a Thai perspective and a Tibet perspective (seemingly similar with nuances).

I know.

I am pretty sure Pooh has never been to Tibet or studied Buddhism … but for a bear with fluff in his head he thinks and says some pretty insightful things.

I do know the oriental world has such a different view on time, and hurrying, than Americans do.

And I often wonder if we could learn something from them (although I do believe that if everyone felt the same culturally it would be a very boring world).


Sometimes I believe we think in terms of minutes and they think in terms of days.

If we have a five year plan they have a hundred year plan.

We hurry to get things done in our lives and they patiently do things in lifetimes.

I would imagine it helps if you believe if you don’t do it in this lifetime it will happen in one of your lifetimes (that whole reincarnation thing). I guess something like that gives some perspective on the importance of time.

So. Back to the quote.River+of+Time

Rivers don’t suggest you stand there and take what life has to give you without fighting back.

Nor does it suggest that you should stand and watch the river go by without you.

What it may suggest though is patience while still moving forward.

It definitely suggests that there is an art to hurrying. If you can flow instead of rush you will get there … and maybe do it with some beauty and grace.

Next time you see a river take a second and watch. It is going someplace. Not hurrying but certainly going somewhere. And if you are patient it will get you there, wherever there may be, someday.

people who don’t think have fluff in their head

March 30th, 2010

“People who don’t think probably don’t have Brains; rather, they have grey fluff that’s blown into their heads by mistake.”
Winnie the Pooh

winnie the pooh thinking


I sometimes talk about sloppy thinking.

Or lazy thinking.

Or maybe even how sometimes people don’t think at all.



Sometimes it’s easier to just “do” and not think. Just to do what you are told to do and not think.

The problem with all of that … well … thinking … is that means you are truly at the mercy of someone else. Physically in your actions and mentally in your thoughts.

Even worse?

Your brain is a muscle. The more you use it the stronger it gets.


Over a period of time if you allow others to do your thinking for you, you will become that person that gets pushed around and bullied into doing things you don’t really want to do.  And no one really wants to be that person (and it is fairly easy to avoid).


All I really know about thinking has been taught to me by others.


I once had an incredibly talented young woman employee (say early 20’s age wise). As a manager you kill to get someone on your team like this. Someone you know from day one will become better than you.


This talented woman asked ‘why’ every time <and I mean ALL the time> I asked her to ‘do’ something. In addition, in a high % of the situations she would also question or challenge the logic beyond the task.

I admit.

It could get frustrating on occasion.

I could get frustrated <and tired>. And she knew I would get frustrated sometimes. And she worried I wasn’t happy with her performance.


We made a deal.

  1. Sometimes she would just need to trust me and go do it.
  2. She would never stop asking why or questioning. Never. <I made her promise>


My promise to her was there would always be enough hours in the day to answer and discuss anything she thought of. I would stay as long as she had questions <or I had no answers left>.


While sometimes things just needed to get done we always made time to discuss thinking.



All that said.


Pooh is correct.

You must have grey fluff in your head if you choose not to think.

Enlightened Conflict