“You know, sometimes in life you can get kinda stuck and you feel like you should have changed chapters by now, but you can’t.”
Wish I Was Here <Aidan>
So. There are ruts … and then there is just being stuck. They are significantly different.
Getting in a rut is sliding down the slippery slope of the everyday grind of Life.
You simply fall into a space where day in and day out you are checking shit off your list and justifying the relatively unsatisfying Life space you are in by showing everyone, and yourself, the list of things you have checked off.
Getting stuck is a more frustrating Life situation.
This is where you know you are not where you want to be and doing things you don’t really want to do and … well … you are stuck. You have shit on your list or at least one important thing on your list, which you want to do, but day in and day out you look at your list and that little nasty shit of a thing never gets checked. And, what is worse, you know you are stuck usually in two ways:
Your own head.
In your mind you may not recognize it for a while … but then it hits you … I am not moving. I am stuck.
You may not recognize it for a while because you feel like you are moving, and you may actually be moving, but then it hits you … everyone else is moving faster. Life, which often looks blurry in the midst of all the shit you want to do, now looks clearer but everyone around you looks blurry. They are moving and you are not. You are stuck.
Suffice it to say … getting stuck sucks.
And getting stuck happens all the time with everyone.
You have most of your shit together.
You know what you want.
You know what it takes to get what you want.
You probably even know the path to getting what you want.
And, even with all that, you are stuck.
But here is the worst aspect of being “stuck.”
You know there is a better version of you, but you are stuck being the current version of you. It may not be a bad version, it may not even be a sucky version, you just know there is a better version.
Ruts are actually relatively easy to get out of. Ruts, more often than not, occur because you permit them to happen … so you just have to stop permitting it to happen.
Getting stuck is usually really difficult to get out of. Stuck, more often than not, occurs DESPITE the fact you are doing whatever you can to not permit it to happen.
If you google “get unstuck” you will get over 200,000 results in .48 seconds. The majority of those results are about ‘changing attitudes’ or ‘simple techniques to get unstuck’ or even ‘breaking habitual patterns.’
Most likely none of this online shit will help you. Mostly because the advice is more about getting out of a rut and not about getting unstuck.
But I would also suggest there ain’t a shitload of advice because … well … getting unstuck is difficult, there are no ‘simple techniques’ and your ‘stuck’ is most likely contextual & situational.
Being stuck is frustrating. Sometimes even maddening. And sometimes it makes you angry. Yeah. It sucks.
I don’t have some secret to share about how to get unstuck. All I know is that it sucks, it feels sucky, and you have to sometimes suck it up and be creative in your pursuit of what you want to get unstuck.
Oh. The other thing to keep in mind.
The “can’t” is just for now.
You may beat your head against some wall for awhile but eventually people who get stuck get unstuck.
That is because, unlike the whole rut situation, you are aware of what is <frustratingly> happening and you want more and you know what you want <and being stuck ain’t it>.
Getting unstuck rarely happens as fast as you want it to, but, I will say that people who get stuck, well, 99% of the time figure out how to get unstuck. So while getting stuck sucks, the majority of us know how to get unstuck.