Posts tagged success
Being Yourself
Apr 25th
I have always kind of lived my life to the beat of my own drum. Probably because I always in some way understood I would never be one of the cool kids. But even with that desire for individuality the game changes when you get in the business world and it becomes about your career. It’s kind of like getting moved into the pro ranks. Everything is faster. The “be yourself” choices get a lot tougher. The mistakes are bigger.
Early on in your career everyone is feeling this whole thing out. Inevitably in youth you seem to gravitate to one of the two extremes:
- fuck the world I am who I am, or,
- I am going to wear the same underwear as everyone else to show how well I fit in.
Of course neither extreme is right if you want to be part of the team and make sure you can look at yourself in the mirror at night with some self esteem.
I was pretty fortunate relatively early in my career to not only get some great advice from some great bosses but I also got a glimpse of a world which kind of opened my eyes a little and made my own path a little clearer.
(here is some background on who taught me the lesson) When I worked in Dallas I had a good friend Puff. (Puff was a family nickname from her childhood). Puff was extraordinarily attractive. She often disappeared for periods of time to do runway modeling in Europe. And she was outrageous personally. Funny. Expressive. Just big in life.
She once made me exit a highway and go back around because she thought the guy driving the car broken down on the side of the highway was cute and she wanted to meet him (it was “misidentification” error on her part – her words – but we did end up getting him to a garage so he could get some help so all was not wasted).
Next example. She was tall and naturally thin (but was also athletic and liked to run). We would always stop in Highland Park after a run and get ice cream. Once – maybe in a hangover induced outrageous moment – she bought two ice cream cones and then proceeded to slap one immediately onto her thigh proclaiming to the crowded place “What the heck. May as well get a head start. Its gonna end up there anyway”. Note: several boyfriends in attendance were resoundly smacked by their companions for looking a little too closely at the melting ice cream.
Anyway. That was life with my friend Puff.
(here is the lesson stuff) Okay. That was fun to relive but here is where I learned the lesson. As her eternally single guy friend I also became her surrogate date for a variety of different functions she was invited to. I just went ahead and bought a tux we went to so many black tie events.
It was there I met my friend Puff in a non friend environment. She was no longer outrageous. She was demure. She didn’t go off in a conversation about some random environment issue passionately. She was quiet and choiceful. I didn’t really know how she did it. It was kind of like a switch flipped. Be sure. She never lied. She never compromised her beliefs or values. She simply blended in. Maybe in another world that stillness would have made her standout but in that calm ocean of branded cocktails and white capped waves of pearls surrounded by the black tie ships roaming sternly about (sorry. I kinda got into the poetic metaphor) she didn’t stand out. She simply blended in as one of the beautiful people. (Of course she could always count on the fishing trawler to swing by and dance with her every once in awhile so I helped her stand out on occasion).
It did make me look at my own workplace a little more closely. And it did make me think about me in the workplace. Did I make the right choice? For myself absolutely. I know I can look back on my career and probably count on one hand the compromises I rue. Career wise? Sure. It limited some windows of opportunity for me. Doesn’t mean I didn’t have windows open just that some others were shut.
Everything we do in life has tradeoffs. And some of these choices will truly affect your success (whether you like to admit that or not). Sure. Of course you always have the opportunity in the work world to seek an environment to be ‘more of yourself naturally. The struggle comes when your passion and what you are good at (see Puff example) almost demands a ‘way to be.’ Choices and tradeoffs. That is what you need to be thinking about ‘being yourself at work.’ (yeah. It sucks a little. One would think you wouldn’t have to invest any time thinking about it but you do.)
Puff was a performer. And I guess my decision was I didn’t really want to be a performer in any way at work. I just wanted to perform. And be judged on that. Unfortunately as we all know that isn’t the way the world works. Puff got it. And she was comfortable with it. She probably overcompensated slightly in her personal world in order to feel a little better about it but she kept the really important “yourself” stuff safe (values, beliefs, stuff like that).
We were friends because we enjoyed such a variety of things as well as being comfortable together. I sometimes believe I was a touch of normalcy and that made us work a little. oh. To be fair. I did like invading that weird modeling/beautiful people life on occasion. Maybe that was my side of it. (one neat benefit of being involved in Puffs life I was able to see Herschel walker in white tights at his debut with the Dallas ballet – note – I haven’t been to ballet since and to be honest I am a little leery of the NFL also). But I didn’t fit into this world … and I couldn’t even really put the effort into trying.
I think we remained good friends during this time because I watched and listened (and we did talk about it) and I never judged.
I don’t know what Puff is doing now. I think we were good friends for the time and place. All I hope for her is that at some point she got to be the outrageous friend I knew and loved but in a work environment. Because I could have guaranteed her a great second career being that person whatever she decided to do after her first career.
But. At that time and place. She consciously made a decision as to how to act in her workplace without compromising her own personal character and you have to give her credit for that. For it is certainly something I could never figure out how to manage in my own career.
Good luck with your own decisions. Just be sure you recognize it is about your choice.
doubt part 1: self doubt
Apr 8th
Trying to shut the whisper of self doubt out of your life is often one of life’s biggest challenges. Some free advice. Doubt is like your shadow. It’s always there. But. Next piece of advice. So what. It’s just your shadow. So. With that cryptic piece of advice out of the way here is what made me think about self doubt (and I have written about others doubt as a companion post):
Jamie the 20something says: It’s like you want something so badly that it becomes a part of every single second of your day and you want it so badly that you feel like you’re walking this very thin tightrope without a net below you. Like, you’re so vulnerable and so empowered and so on fire that it’s frightening, but, I mean, what else are you going to do? Stop wanting it? Er, pretend to stop wanting it? Stop wanting something because you want it so bad that the worry of potential disappointment is stronger than the hope of potential success?
I mean, what the hell do you do?
So. Without even using the word doubt Jamie talks to us about it. The pressure to want ‘to do something’ and the vulnerability that comes along with the actual doing (okay. Maybe better said the ‘trying’).
Often the difficulty is discerning the amount of truth in your own self doubt. Because not everything in life is possible (no matter how those inspirational posters tell you so). Hard work and focus can solve some things and cannot solve some others. If you don’t have the hand-eye coordination to hit a 100mph fastball you just cannot be a baseball player. If you don’t have a natural gift of speaking at best you will always have that unnatural stiffness of practiced speaking. ‘Modest doubt’ is a good thing.
“Modest doubt is called the beacon of the wise. “
William Shakespeare
Sometimes self doubt is a reality check. Just make sure you don’t ignore a small dose of reality.
The next level of self doubt is separating doubt from fear of the attempt and fear of failure. It is difficult and doubt sneaks as you assess what to do from perceived strengths and real strengths (or weaknesses if you want to take that road). This is where self doubt gets tricky (or challenging). Self doubt can freeze you into inaction. And inaction can take place in a variety of ways because it is a sly little devil. Be careful ‘inaction doubt’ doesn’t hide itself somewhere in the ‘I don’t have enough information yet’ or ‘I will do it when I gain some more experience’ or even ‘I don’t know where to start’ phrases of fear of attempt. Sure. Some of them have a shred of truth but if you are waiting for everything to be all lined up to say ‘go’, well, you may as well decide now it ain’t ever gonna happen.
Anyway. I imagine the best thought may be that rarely does something really bad happen because of the attempt. You can’t hide from life. You have to live it. Especially if you ever want even a chance to reach your dreams or aspirations. And the attempt will almost always be despite the doubts (for 100% certainty is simple foolishness). So. In the end how do you deal with self doubt?
“Action will remove the doubt that theory cannot solve”
Pehyl Hsieh
Oh. One last thought (in a post strewn with quotes):
“If a man will begin with certainties, he shall end in doubts; but if he will be content to begin with doubts he shall end in certainties.”
Francis Bacon
Maybe, in the end, a little self doubt isn’t bad.
Gorilla BBQ – A Study in Successful Entrepreneurship
Feb 9th
Note: Click here for my earlier post on Gorilla Barbecue and their amazing ribs.
As I walked into Gorilla BBQ for my Sunday beef brisket and the most awesome ribs in San Francisco, I had a moment to reflect on their success model. Plus. Gorilla (the co-owner) and I actually had a minute to talk.
They always have a line. Sometimes very long. I would say 2 weekends out of every month they run out of at least two items on their 4 item menu list before closing.
He loves it. No hassles of sit down – it’s all take out. He sells what he makes every day. He slowly expands how much he makes as his “running out” drives customers to come earlier and he feeds the new later ones. He is thinking about maybe having a second location but he has reservations because he is concerned about replicating how he makes his food elsewhere.
Quality is numero uno to Gorilla.
I have worked with a number of extensive franchise organizations and I have lived through how difficult expansion planning can be.
The pursuit of profit is enticing. And sometimes the overwhelming sense of “I have to do it before someone else gets there” is difficult to stave off. ‘How much is enough’ can be a facts and figures discussion or it can be a philosophical discussion.
What Gorilla understands is the charisma or mystique factor. His stuff is good. Unfailingly good. But his business’s reputation outstrips his stuff. He is constantly reaching out to more sales rather than excess capacity.
So. Expansion in retail is tricky. Heck. Any expansion is tricky.
Do organizations make it a science? Sure they do (analysis of geography and consumption and possible customers and ticket size and all that crap – albeit useful crap). I have seen multi-page spreadsheets and maps and revenue analysis information presentations and binders that would make your head spin.
I am sure Starbucks had numbers out the wazoo for location growth plan. What I personally believe they missed was the mystique quotient (never seen that number in an analysis). That, I believe, is more a gut thing. It is also a philosophical vision decision. I personally wouldn’t have expanded Starbucks that fast and I would have tried to maintain some mystique. But, yeah, I could be using hindsight (as they run into some struggles).
Yeah. I know (and like) their “third location” strategy (home, work, starbucks). It’s just that maximizing that location strategy threatened what made them so popular in the beginning.
Hey. Starbucks isn’t going to crash. But their over expansion has created issues they may not have had to deal with had they been a little less aggressive in store openings.
Hey (again). Many businesses cross that line in expansion. It is a line that is difficult to see. Especially when it becomes about money.
But. Back to my man Gorilla and his business. He has two huge things going for him:
- He understands exactly what makes him successful: His food. While maybe he is conservative about expanding at the risk of that standard, he fully understands why he has lines and a profitable business.
- He understands his priorities. I am sure he likes money but he hasn’t let it overwhelm his direction.
Once again, having worked with dozens of companies and expansion, I don’t doubt for one minute all those companies who expanded beyond what now seems unreasonable fully understood #1. In fact I think they sometimes fool themselves a little into believing that expanding is a formula (at one or a small group of locations) that can be easily replicated (replicating quality is a tricky thing too).
It is number 2 that really gets people in trouble. Money is an evil thing. Greed is good (for the economy). Greed is bad for a great business guy’s head. It leads thinking astray.
What Gorilla has going for him is he isn’t greedy. And he likes to like his stuff (and won’t compromise that).
Will he be a millionaire? Maybe. I doubt it.
Will he make money? Sure. No, let me take that back and say, absolutely.
Will he be happy? In no uncertain terms. Unequivocally. Yes.
What more could you ask for?
An Unexpected Super Bowl Business Lesson
Feb 8th
So. Sundays are my “mother days” which meant I didn’t get to watch the Super Bowl excepting a couple of glimpses. I saw maybe three commercials. Nothing that really hit me (except I got to see Danica Patrick naked on a massage table which was okay).
But. As an avid SportsCenter watcher I was able to relive all the key moments as well as all the non key moments ad nauseam. Regardless. There was one segment and discussion that tingled my business antennae (I don’t really have antennae as you can see from my picture).
The Saints onside kick to open the second half.
So. Here’s the business lesson:
Prepare the team: Sean Payton told his team “we are going to do an onside kick”. He told them before the game. And stated in no uncertain terms they were going to do it regardless of the score or situation. So. When the time came he called the play (exactly like he told his team he would do). I wasn’t there but it seems he delivered on his leadership unhesitatingly. He put the idea in their heads early so when the moment came it wasn’t “huh” and no confusion. He simply pulled the trigger on a gun already cocked. The coach prepared the implementers for successful execution.
Prepare the referees: Awesome lesson.
First. He wanted the people who could make a difference to be aware (and he told them before the game…there is a lesson number two to that). Anyway. He wanted the refs prepared, aware and not surprised when it happened.
Second. Telling them before the game. Okay. I am sure he reminded the head judge as they came out from halftime but by telling them before the game it was one less thing for him to think about (it made it appear “business as usual” to any Colts “spies”). He eliminated a variable.
Surprised people may sometimes not be paying attention to the right thing. Surprised people may have been slightly out of position. The referees were prepared mentally and physically for the situation.
The coach had prepared the gatekeepers to success.
Prepare the opposition (for your own success): The coach told the refs the Saints would do it from a standard kickoff line up format. The coach had created an onside kick off play from a traditional kickoff line up. So. They lined up in the familiar kickoff lineup. The Saints didn’t “jump” the onside play and the Colts had no idea it was coming. The referees knew it was coming. The players were prepared to make it happen. Pretty much the perfect storm for success.
They executed an unexpected play from an expected structure. Gotta love it.
The coach created a situation to maximize the likelihood of success.
Nice lesson from the Saints. Stick with this in the business environment and you will complete more “plays” successfully. That’s for sure.
