Enlightened Conflict

staying above even when stepping down

June 25th, 2017

 

inspire people dont give up

 

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“Even the smallest person can change the course of the future.”

 

—-

J.R.R Tolkien

 

 

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“And though she be but little, she is fierce.”

—-

William Shakespeare

 

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Ok.

 

lead togther step down dominant

This is about business and business leadership.

 

Leading is a big job. It carries big responsibilities and big burdens. You have to be big enough in some way <skills, charisma, character, smarts, etc.> to stay above the organization and employees. And I say “above” because part of leading is being able to see above the heads of everyone so that you can lead and align and step in when & where appropriate.

 

Above is not dominance per se just that you maintain a dominant position from which you can most effectively & efficiently lead.

 

Now.

 

Here is what any good leader knows … you don’t have to be big to … well … be big.

Heck. You don’t even have to act ‘big.’

 

In addition.

 

A good leader can leave the comfort of the ‘throne’, i.e. the trappings of the ‘bigness’ –the natural ‘dominance’ that comes with a title — and still remain above even when stepping down from all those things.trump dominant Genuine people fake people

 

However.

 

Not everyone is a good leader. And not every leader is particularly good at navigating the natural doubts <am I doing the right thing, am I doing the best thing, am I doing the thing I should be doing, etc.> that come along with being a leader. By the way … any good leader has some doubts on occasion … it keeps them grounded.

 

Regardless.

 

What that means is there will inevitably be business people who fear looking small. And they protect their illusions of ‘bigness’, or being bigly, mainly in several ways:

 

  • They diminish everyone they can in the attempt to make others as small as they can so that they look bigger no matter the comparison

 

  • They find a ‘safe space’ in which they place their metaphorical throne and make everyone come to them <this is kind of like the boss who purposefully has their desk built slightly higher and the chairs facing the desk slightly lower to insure they maintain a physical dominant position>

 

  • They avoid, as much as possible, one-on-one interactions with anyone their own size <unless they can control the environment>.

 

  • They ground themselves in platitudes under the guise of “flexibility & adaptability” so they can avoid having to defend anything specific with anyone who could diminish their bigness

 

 

Well.

 

Why I decided to write about this is … uhm … day in and day out Donald J Trump offers us in the business world reminders of ineffective leadership style and the characteristics of insecure leadership.

And the number one business dunce stupid brand marketingcharacteristic of insecure leadership is the inability to step down and still stay above.

 

Insecure leaders are extremely hesitant, if not completely resistant, to leaving their ‘dominant position.’

 

Let me explain ‘dominant position’ because it can sound bad <and it is mainly meant to express a position of authority>.

 

A CEO or a president is clearly in a dominant position by title and by responsibility and, in most cases, by some larger skill that got them to where they are. A true ‘dominant position’ <let’s call it “authority”> combines all aspects.

 

Therefore the person in the dominant position combines substance & style. And this is where insecurity steps in … because if a leader has any true doubts with regard to their ‘dominant position’ – mostly doubts on their substance — they start exhibiting some insecure characteristics.

They will dial up their style aspects to cloak any substance deficiencies and become excruciatingly careful with regard to how they interact with other people.

 

But the one I thought about today was “stepping down.’

 

Let me explain.

 

I heard Donald J say the other day “they should call us to participate.” In other words … they need to come to me <thereby establishing some aspect of subservience and feeds the sense of ‘dominant position.’

 

shift up or down

This was not a one-off comment.

He does this … every … frickin’ … day.

 

Trump never “goes to people” nor does he unite by inserting himself into any opposing groups <people who may not agree with him> opening himself up to say “let me be part of what you want.” I cannot envision him ever going to opposition and suggesting he wanted to work with them <they have to come to him>.

His whole leadership style is driven by an insecurity of ‘dominant position’ and he fears stepping down from his position because he fears it will expose the fact he isn’t really above anyone other than in title.

 

In other words … he fears looking small <or ‘not bigly’>.

 

And therein lies the larger lesson.

 

Good leaders don’t become smaller when they step down or go to people rather than make people go to them. They know there are no ‘little people’ but rather only big responsibilities of which everyone has.

 

Little people are little wherever they go … even if they just sit in the corner office.

Unfortunately for us a little leader knows this … and doesn’t know this.

What I mean by that is they can sense their littleness therefore they go out of their way to stay within whatever cocoon of ‘bigness trappings’ to encourage the belief they have that they are actually big. And, yet, they don’t know this rump dominant Do you think clouds look down on people and thinkbecause they tend to have an oversized view of themselves <every should come to me attitude>.

 

They see themselves through a fairly warped view of self-relevance … “everyone else becomes more relevant by being around me therefore they become bigger in my bigness.” And that partially outlines their main fear.

Loss of relevance.

Anyone who becomes more relevant than them is a danger. Loss of power, the illusion of or real, is the danger.

 

What that all means is that an insecure leader more often than not lives in a “you need to come to me, call me or ask me” mentality.

 

  • Foreign dignitaries come to visit him <and he does not visit them>.
  • Democrats should call me instead of being obstructionists.
  • People need to visit him at the White House <or Mar a Lago>.
  • He never works with people or offers to meet them.

 

He treats everyone as if they should be subservient to him and if they do not meet that desire he is dismissive or even attacks them as ‘obstructionist.’

 

leadership go your way

 

Let me be clear.

 

No sane business leader <in this generation> has this attitude.

You cannot.

You cannot because you know many of the people working for you are actually smarter than you and a shitload more just may know something you do not know.

You cannot because oftentimes your peers, who actually report to you, may actually be better than you at some things.

You cannot because you know that good people never want to feel subservient but rather want to feel being a key part of overall success.

 

Most of those who lead have learned these things not by attempting to learn to be ‘above’ but rather by learning how to lead. And you learn that mostly by getting into ‘the game’ and realizing you can play anywhere at any time. I know that I took an advertising job as a young newly promoted VP in NYC not out of any desire to be the best but because I was curious. I was curious to see if I could “play in the NYC advertising game.” I didn’t need to be the best nor did I desire to dominate … I just wanted to see if I could play.

I can tell you that once you become comfortable with knowing you can play at the biggest level and the lowest level you have a fighting chance to become a leader.

 

Look.

 

We all have numerous character flaws and it is a sad truth the majority of us can’t see them. This is even more difficult in a leadership position because you do naturally become more self-aware of any of the things you are good at and yet also not good at … but you also lean heavily on the things you ‘perceive’ got you where you are today.

 

I say that because insecure leaders are relatively hollow on the self-awareness.

Looking at Trump it is easy to see that he grew up thinking he could get away with whatever he wanted. He lived in a bubble in which young, mentally lazy, rich, amoral white men routinely got away with whatever they wanted. These same characteristics are exhibited in his insecure leadership style.

 

Here is what I know.

trump ominant look down on other people

Big leaders are big leaders.

 

And they are big because wherever they go they retain their bigness. That means they need not ‘stay above’ to be big … they can step down … sit in town halls answering questions from real people as well as sit down with people who didn’t vote for you as well as sit down with peers and discuss ideas … and walk away just as big as they entered the room.

 

Small leaders cannot do those things, therefore, they do not.

 

I have now given you a way to judge big leaders from small leaders. Judge away. Every leader should be judged … and judged harshly … because … well … they are leaders and that is their burden.

the science, and the lost art, of ROI

May 24th, 2017

choices-path-shopping-direction-decisions

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“… businesses want answers right away and many times high statistical reliability is not worth the cost it takes to achieve it.

 

Insights that point decision-makers to go “left” or “right” is innately good enough. Leaders are oftentimes not willing to pay for “turn left at a 30 degree angle” or “turn right at an 115 degree angle” because it may cost too much money and takes far too long to obtain those precise next steps through drawn-out methodologies.”

 

—–

Kuhn

 

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“Every great advance in science has issued from a new audacity of imagination.”

 

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John Dewey

 

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“Perfect numbers like perfect men are very rare.”

 

—–

Rene Descartes

 

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Well.

 

fire water contradiction ideas thinkThis is about how ROI gets abused in decision making and I am writing about that because the Trump administration issued their “national budget proposal” <which I fully acknowledge is simple a guideline of the administration’s desires> and immediately started ponying up all their “we made cuts where there was no evidence of appropriate results” justifications.

 

Some of those justifications are terrifying.

Some of their choices are terrifying.

 

As for the budget plan?  As one writer put it … “the math is terrifying.”

 

Cutting Medicaid would be devastating for all low-income Americans, but particularly for women and mothers: 45 percent of childbirths in the U.S. were funded by Medicaid in 2010, according to data from the Center on Budget and Policy Priorities.

Trump’s budget also cuts funding for after-school programs for children and support for domestic violence victims.

 

I am going to let other people tear apart the incredibly short sighted Trump budget plan <which, yes, has scraps of good ideas> and I will focus on the criteria it appears they focused on <excepting the parental leave initiative which was like placing a half-eaten M&M on top of a turd> — budget by ROI.

 

Budgeting by ROI.

 

Whew.

 

 

This provides me with another excuse to blast my generation of business leaders and how their misguided thinking has screwed up not only how business is conducted, in general, but how we think about business. Specifically about ROI … these hollow men hollowed out business of any of the ‘art’ and color which is associated with thriving businesses which contribute to society & cultural norms leaving at an empty husk of dollars & cents and black & white ROI decisions.

 

Look.

 

roi einstein

I am all for analysis and love quantitatively judging tactics and initiatives. But I also understand that <1>  numbers often do not always tell the entire story and <2> we far too often judge ROI on one specific outcome without assessing some value on some ‘ripple effect’ outcomes.

 

But, first, the numbers and ROI.

 

I wrote back in February that numbers have lost their mojo  … yeah … well … I still believe that … just in a different context.

 

In this case we are dealing with a generation of business people who have completely bastardized the use of numbers – stripping them of anything but the false veneer of what they call “simplistic stark truth.”

Now. ‘Simplistic stark truth’ sounds good … and it sounds really good in the business world.

 

And, yet, in this starkness there is found falseness. The falseness can be found in its lack of imagination, its lack of depth and its lack of seeing anything but ‘what can be measured.’

 

This stupid view of numbers wreaks havoc when viewing ROI analysis.

 

Now … back on November 13th 2016 I wrote about the Trump administration as the last stand of the old white men  <the business generation I continuously skewer> and discussed hollowness. And while I outlined a number of ‘hollow’ things which can be blamed on this generation in that piece I neglected to point one out — the hollowing of ROI.

 

————–

 

ROI.

 

ROI <return on investment> is a fabulous tool. It offers us every day unimaginative pragmatic schmucks an almost heuristic way to judge some fairly complex and complicated things in business.

 

But old white men hollowed ROI of anything intangible and along the way scraped away some of the most meaningful things associated with investment in their desire for simplistic “this led to that.” Certainly some investments have linear outcomes and results. But not all. And these hollow men in their black & white pursuit of profit, efficiency and outcomes became color blind.  Old white men started looking at people as equal to numbers & dollars and not organic organisms of less than linear productivity <in terms of Life actualization as well as business actualization>. These hollow men fell in love with numbers and began diminishing the value of humanity.

 

That is Trump in a nutshell.

 

—————-

.......... hollow men making hollow decisions ......

………. hollow men making hollow decisions ……

Well.

 

I could argue this all happened because ROI analysis permitted a shortcut for business people — a thinking & decision making shortcut.

It permitted, and encouraged, an entire generation to not have to really think but rather fallback on “that’s what the analysis said.”

 

That is plain and simple lazy fucking business … not smart solid business.

 

I will not argue that a good ROI analysis can offer a quick spontaneous glimpse of truth viable snapshot … in fact … it was Ralph Waldo Emerson who stated that the growth of intellect is spontaneous.

 

Of course, he hadn’t been bludgeoned with measurement, ROI and data driven decisions.

 

Of course, he was also on the one who stated … what is the hardest task in the world? To think. And. We are all wise. The difference between create destroy pencilpersons is not in wisdom but in art.

 

And that is where Trump and his merry band of old white men doing this whole budget thing are most aggravating.

 

It is not that they cannot envision the art of decision making but rather they purposefully abstain from the art of decision making <and focus solely on ROI>.

 

It is not that they are incapable of holding two conflicting ideas at the same time but rather they purposefully choose to ignore one idea or thought for the one most supported by the science of ROI.

 

 

It is not that they are oblivious to the qualitative nature & benefits of budgetary decision but rather they avoid the more difficult defense of the qualitative to utilize the more easy, and lazy, rationale of the quantitative.

 

I don’t blame them specifically <although it is their budget blueprint> but it is the unfortunate legacy of that entire generation to do those things.

 

All that said.

 

While ROI seems a straightforward way to analyze … ROI, when evaluated properly, can be devilishly tricky … but when done well it can inform some great insightful decisions and ideas.

 

ROI, when evaluated properly, can be devilishly painful … like having the devil screaming at you type painful … and even when done well tends to dull <not sharpen> the good ideas.

 

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The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed ideas in mind at the same time and still retain the ability to function.

 

—-

F. Scott Fitzgerald

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But ROI, measurement … practical rewards & output … that is what we ‘do’ these days.

This seem o be our “how we conduct business handbook” these days.

philosophical-discovering-gravity

We seem to have forgotten the value of unsought discovery and the value of … well … the benefit of the benefit <I spent money which created ‘x’ outcome … which enabled this other ‘x’ outcome>.

 

We seem to have culturally decided consciously to … “inevitably we will show a failure of imagination.”

 

What do I mean ? Let me use a quote from Le Carre’s Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy:

 

 

 

“…in the hands of politicians grand designs achieve nothing but new forms of the old misery…”

 

 

 

In our failure of imagination in our analysis of existing programs and initiatives we come up with grand designs begetting new forms of old misery. But what makes today and this budget worse? These are supposed to be fucking business people and not politicians in place making these ‘grand designs’ <isn’t that what some people voted for with Trump?>.

 

I admit.

 

I am wary of how ‘we the people’ will move forward with regard to budgeting tough-choices-shopping-decisions-lifeand programs and policies and deciding what we should do to better America..

 

I am wary because I see little moving forward, no ‘trying to do what it takes to get there’ other than bludgeoning people with simplistic harsh solutions and no imagination to overcome the cries of ‘why waste money on something like this!”

 

I am wary because I see men of a generation who bastardized ROI analysis applying their own bastardized version of ROI thinking to people’s lives <under the guise of “applying it to people’s money/taxes” — no, they are not the same>.

 

I am a business guy.

 

I cannot envision running a business, or a government, without solid measurement, ROI & budgeting rigor.

 

But I also know from running a business with hundreds of employees that the greatness of an organization does not reside solely in some number … or some ROI analysis.

 

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“The true greatness of a nation is not measured by the vastness of its territory, or by the multitude of its people, or by the profusion of its exports and imports; but by the extent to which it has contributed to the life and thought and progress of the world.

 

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I tend to believe most of us every day schmucks recognize that ROI is part of doing business and insuring our hard earned money/taxes is used effectively.

But I also believe that most of us every day schmucks also realize that some things just cannot be measured solely by numbers.

 

 

I worry that this Trump administration is reflective of the lost art of ROI family choices tough decisions aheadanalysis and the value of discovery

 

In their love of money as ‘winning’ they have lost sight of the value of seeking what is beyond the horizon. They have devalued imagination to such a point that they most likely define imagination as measurable in an ROI analysis. In other words they take ideas and thoughts, even ones with no history, and embrace them not by saying “what if” and “what could be” but rather by grinding it through some veg-o-matic ROI machine to assess its true value.

 

And that, my friends, is how they came up with their “blueprint for a national budget.”

 

And that, my friends, is how they plan on running this country and making their decisions.

 

And that, my friends, is not how America does business … because it shows a failure of imagination and it is imagination, not ROI analysis, which drives real change and progress.

 

—————–

 

“Imagination has brought mankind through the dark ages to its present state of civilization.

Imagination led Columbus to discover America. Imagination led Franklin to discover electricity. Imagination has given us the steam engine, the telephone, the talking-machine, and the automobile, for these things had to be dreamed of before they became realities.

 

So I believe that dreams–daydreams, you know, with your eyes wide open and your brain machinery whizzing–are likely to lead to the betterment of the world.

 

The imaginative child will become the imaginative man or woman most apt to invent, and therefore to foster, civilization.”

=

 

Baum

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executive coaching and solving obliviousness

February 24th, 2017

 

either madness or brilliance

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“… life coaching is quickly becoming one of the leading tools that successful people use to live extraordinary lives.”

 

some Life coach

 

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“WTF.”

 

Bruce

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Well.

 

Back in 2013 I asked the question ‘what did we do before life coaching’ … used life coachthe quotes above … and basically stated I thought Life coaching was a bullshit profession.

 

And while I received a great comment, which highlighted some good points on what coaching should & should not be, basically scolding me with regard to what I said … any ‘coaching’ isn’t really about telling someone what to do but rather providing an outside perspective attempting to show insights to help someone get to where they want to go.

To me it seems to me that all Life, and Executive, coaching does is to assist in steps to insure … well … accountability … personal & managerial. And it seems to me that all this coaching does is make an attempt to better control one’s destiny <which I imagine is anyone’s real objective not just some executive>.

 

I know I could never be a coach mostly because I don’t think I am that positive nor can I use the words these coaches seem to love “world wants to give you everything you desire” … “your uniqueness is a pleasant gift you can give to the world” ….  “takes courage to follow the path you believe in”“positive energy always attracts positive outcomes”.

I know I could never be a coach because I do believe there are limits to someone’s ability … in other words … everyone has a ceiling. That doesn’t mean you cannot improve sideways or build some depth to improve or fill in some cracks in your ability … just that we do have a reality ‘stop sign’ with regard to our abilities.

 

Regardless.

 

I am just not that motivational.

It just seems like bullshit to me and all I want to do is to “talk about getting shit done the way you want to get it done using a good moral compass to guide it all.”

 

That would be my coaching selling point.

Kinda “blah.”

Kinda no bullshit.

 

And, you know what?

I talk with dozens of CEO’s and business owners on a random basis and they don’t need coaching … they just need some new perspectives to get them out of where they are mentally and step out for a fresh view on a topic, issue or problem. And they mostly don’t need any motivational bullshit, or any bullshit for that matter, or buzzword crap.

 

I still believe Life coaching <and I do toss ‘executive coaching’ in that segment … although most I have crossed paths with are less ‘faux psychologists’ and more ‘pragmatic measuring milestones’ advisors> as mostly bullshit.

 

But.

And this is a big but.

 

If I could ever point to a case in which I believe executive coaching, or Life coaching, may actually be useful … it would be with Donald J. Trump. I am fairly sure I have never seen a business leader with worse organizational leadership instincts and as poor inspirational, vision and communications leader skills.

 

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“The crowning fortune of a man is to be born to some pursuit which finds him employment and happiness, whether it be to make baskets, or broadswords, or canals, or statues, or songs.”

 

Ralph Waldo Emerson

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obvious oblivious confuse blind lead

I am fairly sure we would have less than zero chance of convincing good ole Donald J to accept some coaching because I think he is oblivious to the fact he is not loved by all, he is not respected by all, he is not followed by all <because he attained the title> or that he is not perceived as a great business person by all.

 

He seems oblivious to the fact he actually has to ‘win over’ the skeptics <which every newly promoted leader knows you have to do> and that he actually has to ‘win over’ basic approval <which he is sorely lagging in>.

 

  • Donald J is not only oblivious I would suggest if he read what I just wrote he wouldn’t understand one aspect of it.

 

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“There was no answer, except the general answer life gives to all the most complex and insoluble questions.

That answer is: one must live for the needs of the day, in other words, become oblivious.”

 

Leo Tolstoy, Anna Karenina

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While people can debate his appropriate approval ratings <most agree it is dismal> a new CBS study broke down the range of President Trump’s potential support by showing people separated, by themselves, into four groups:

 

  • The Believers. the strongest of Trump backers those backing him but waiting for him to deliver. Believers (22%)] are the president’s strongest backers, who like what he’s doing and how he’s doing it; defend him against his critics, and see him as defending the country against threats.

CBS oblivious Trump skeptics view organization

 

  • The Conditionals. Those quai-supporting him for now but waiting to see some results. Conditionals (22%)] will remove their support if he doesn’t ‘fix the economy’ for them. They’re also concerned about safety, but aren’t as all-in with everything Mr. Trump does, especially in terms of style. A quarter don’t like the tweets.

 

 

  • The Curious. The curious (21%) oppose Mr. Trump at the moment but ‘would reconsider’ supporting him if he does a good job. They’re looking for more than just results, though – they want Mr. Trump to reach out to them, and they want respect.

 

 

  • The Resistors. those who seem immovably, firmly opposed: The Resistors (35%). They want the Democrats to oppose Mr. Trump on many more things, rather than try to work with him; demographically, they are much more likely to be either African-American or Hispanic and young.

 

 

I would assume this is the specific type of information a leader, seeking to lead, would love to have. And if he/she <Donald J> chose to be oblivious to it … I would assume this is the specific type of information an Executive coach would love to have.

 

To ignore this type of information would not only be leadership malpractice but poor organizational awareness.

 

I wrote back in January that being aware that ‘converting Skepticals is always the key to organizationally unity‘.  No … it is not breeding excitement among the fewer believers nor is it attempting to placate the non-believers … getting an organization going is almost always about ‘the skeptical.’

 

Skepticals reside in the Promised Land for a leader. One foot in hopeful promise and one foot in practical promise.

I say that because 43% of America <Conditionals & Curious> are the Skepticals to Trump.

 

comfort talk face in the eye

……………… coaching Donald J. …………………

If I were coaching Donald J I would be focusing on that 43% day in and day out because … well … while I could argue it is the potential pathway to alignment … they actually reflect ‘effectiveness.’

 

If I were coaching Donald J I would tell him to be very concerned with the “resistors’ because … well … 35% is a ‘yuge’ number … as in massive. It is the kind of number that would keep any sane CEO awake at night.

 

If I were coaching Donald J I would also point out that if he would solve the Skeptical group they will inevitably drag a good % of the Resistors out of steadfast resistant into a ‘reluctant cooperator’ status <which is okay>.

 

  • Donald J is not only oblivious I would suggest if he read what I just wrote he wouldn’t understand one aspect of it.

 

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“I wasn’t sure what was worse: being oblivious or living within reality.”

 

Shannon A. Thompson

 

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I admit.

It seems crazy to me to have to be writing this shit.

 

Like I said earlier … I speak with dozens of CEO types and know even more personally.  Not one … zero … would need this type of advice.

And why I can say that is simple.

 

Of the 200 people promoted to their 1st manager position … 200 of them will make rookie mistakes. They will not have ‘coaches’ but they will have mentors & bosses and they will do some shit by trial & error and figure it out.

 

Of the 200 people promoted to their senior level manager position … 200 of them will make some mistake … but only about 20 of them will make a mistake that reflects some obliviousness to what reality is.

 

Of the 200 people promoted to their CEO/business owner position … 198 of them will make some mistakes … but the mistakes they make will not be organizational type crap but rather “what to do first & how to do things” type missteps … and maybe 2 of them will remain oblivious to reality.

 

I am sure Executive Coaches can help out on the “what to do first & how to do things” type missteps and that is why that profession exists … but what the hell do you do with the 2?

<which I am tempted to suggest Donald J fits into>

 

Anyway.

 

Lastly.

 

I would coach Donald J. on the “yuge” difference between confidence & optimism.

Trump oblivious curious organizationI could view the numbers I showed earlier as well as some other attitudinal polls and get a nice sense that a larger group of my organization had a strong thread of optimism for a variety of meaningful things.

If I were the CEO, I would like that.

 

I could also view the numbers I showed earlier as well as some other attitudinal polls and get an uncomfortable sense that a larger group of my organization wasn’t exactly confident — with regard to me & my behavior as well as attaining the desired results.

 

To be honest. The situation could be worse. If I were that CEO I wouldn’t be euphoric but on the other hand I would recognize that, if managed wisely, I could close the gap between optimism & confidence and make it a ‘yuge’ win for the organization.

 

  • Donald J is not only oblivious I would suggest if he read what I just wrote he wouldn’t understand one aspect of it.

 

Sigh.oblivious do not want to hear

 

I honestly do not know what you do with regard to coaching a CEO who is either oblivious to the reality of his or her organization … or worse … believes it is irrelevant.

 

But maybe that is why I am not an Executive Coach. I wouldn’t know what to do to coach him.

 

What I do know is that because of Trump … I am actually rethinking my views on the value of Life coaching and Executive coaching.

 

 

Enlightened Conflict