thoughts on ‘someone stole naked pictures of’

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selfie stolen pic drawing

“One does not walk into the forest and accuse the trees of being off-center,

Nor do they visit the shore and call the waves imperfect.

So why do we look at ourselves this way? “

Tao Te Ching

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So.

 

 

This is an older story but it seems topical.

It has to do with private naked selfies made public.

 

 

Whew.

 

 

If you want a generational point of view disparity just bring up selfies. If you want to have the same disparate discussion but with some glaringly ignorant, or naive, thoughts <on the part of older people who are supposed to be able to see selfie hashtagthe bigger picture better> just begin a discussion on naked selfies.

 

 

I have written about selfies before.

 

 

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http://brucemctague.com/selfies-and-how-old-people-just-dont-get-it

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As for private naked selfies?

 

 

Well.

 

 

While it would be easy to suggest immaturity or narcissism … lets take the high road and discuss what it is really about … self-expression, validation, esteem, doubts and … well … self … not public.

 

 

We all seek some self validation in the face of some self doubt.

 

 

Except for the narcissistic few the majority of us dwell in a world of ‘ordinary’ – at least in our own minds. And while we don’t seek extraordinary we are constantly fighting to reach across the boundary of ‘just ordinary’ to make sure we are not ‘less than ordinary.’

 

 

And in our ordinariness we seek some validation that someone somewhere could possibly see us at least a little extraordinary.

 

 

Seeking this validation is rarely done flippantly. But this choice is one we make in a variety of ways … not just naked selfies …

 

 

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If you write poetry in a journal, you hesitate to share … and when you do it is personal.

If you write stories and thoughts on your computer, you hesitate to share … and when you do it is personal.

If you have thoughts in your head, you hesitate to share …and when you do it is personal.

If you take pictures of yourself, you hesitate to share … and when you do it is personal.

 

 

 

eclectic woman attractive

 

The hesitation to share is driven by self-doubt … am I stupid, am I silly, am I unattractive, am I indistinct <and therefore invisible>.

 

 

But when you do share you tend to reach out to someone you trust. Or someone … well … personally involved.

 

Suffice it to say … you bare more than your skin you bare your soul and what is inside.

 

 

And when you do make this choice most often you seek some self validation … you are not stupid, you are not silly, you are not unattractive, you are not just some bland ordinary individual.

 

 

Most of us simply seek a glimpse of validation … we don’t need a flood of feedback.

 

 

Regardless.

 

 

That decision is private.

 

And that decision is personal.

 

 

The venue you elect to share what you decide to bare does not somehow eliminate how personal that decision & choice is.

 

 

There is a massive difference between ‘assume that nothing on the internet is private and you wont go far wrong’ and ‘assume that nothing in your email is private and you wont go wrong.’

 

 

And please … please … don’t anyone start the whole ‘everything on your email is saved in a cloud format therefore you have just forfeited the possibility of privacy.’

 

 

WHERE I elect to make this personal choice drives privacy.

 

 

If I post something on Tumblr that is different than if I share something one-on-one with someone via email or text.

 

 

The other thing older people do is blame the internet and how we use it.

 

Contrary to some beliefs … the internet is not stumbling around trying to find its moral code … the internet is not a person simply a vehicle FOR people. The internet is not some ethical battlefield of exploitation … it is a personal battlefield of exploitation.

 

 

Every person has a right to do in their privacy of their homes, or their emails, what they want and choose to share it privately if that is what they elect to do..

 

 

this generation old man yellsOh.

 

 

Here is the other thing older people say.

 

“If you didn’t take the pictures at all you wouldn’t be in this position.”

 

 

Well, duh, but that really isn’t the point is it?

 

 

It may SOUND like simple solid advice to suggest to young people that ‘look, if you do this, there is a risk something like that could happen?’ and suggest there are bad people out there who could upload pictures without consent.

 

But the moment you begin to shy away from personal private behavior based on fear … you have flipped the power away from freedom to those who seek to defile the very fiber of the moral structure of culture & society.

 

 

I admit.

 

It is a very very fine line between simply being careful with regard to risks & behavior and changing your behavior for fear of potential risk. But on that thin line resides a basic moral code of consent. And consent given within a private arrangement or private situation does not transfer to public consent.

 

 

 

Anyway.

 

 

The story.

 

 

Four years ago, intimate photographs of Danish journalist Emma Holten were posted on the web. Thousands viewed them and she still receives online harassment.

 

She chose to respond in a video where she explains her thoughts, very well I may add, and a set of naked pictures she has CHOSEN to share rather than have someone else make that choice for her.

 

 

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Holten decided to pose for and release a new set of pictures of her body.

Here she explains why:

WARNING: THIS VIDEO CONTAINS NUDITY

<but is not by any stretch pornographic>:

http://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/video/2015/jan/21/naked-pictures-this-is-what-i-did-revenge-porn-emma-holten-video

====accept things why

 

In the end.

 

 

While I am proud this young woman elected to take a stand on her terms I am also extremely aggravated that she was put in such a position to have to make that choice.

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Written by Bruce