are flawed packages the real perfection we seek?

advice imperfections inspire

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 “To banish imperfection is to destroy expression, to check exertion, to paralyze vitality.”  

John Ruskin

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First.

 

 

This is not about politics <although I open with a politician thought>.

 

 

Second.

 

 

We seem to often confuse what we want in a leader and what we need in a leaders?

 

 

Could a president in a wheelchair be elected in today’s world?

 

 

How about one who stuttered?

 

 

How about one who is an introvert?

 

 

Or … well … choose your imperfection <or “flawed package”>.

 

 

And these are more obvious “glaring” differences from what we want. And, yet, want need circles imperfectwhat we truly seek, need in fact, is someone who commands respect, can lead, can make the hard decisions fairly and not always do what people think they want but do what they need <because, frankly, we people truly suck at discerning what is best for us holistically>.

 

 

What made me think of this?

 

 

Jeb Bush acknowledged he’s not the greatest speaker in the world.

 

 

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“If it’s about delivering great speeches, I’m not going to be president, probably.”

Jeb Bushimperfection mistakes real

==

 

 

He also stated that shouldn’t be how voters judge him as he pursues the presidency. What a delightful bit of candor … and sobering truth. A bit of self reflection with regard to an ‘imperfection’ which simply makes him who he is.

 

 

By the way … he also said … “Conservatives will win if we are hopeful and optimistic, and if we have concrete plans.”

 

 

Uhm.

 

The winner, in general, will be the one who offers some optimism & hope combined with concrete plans.

 

 

Anyway.

 

 

And then in the other party Hilary Clinton is chastised relentlessly for not being ‘warm’ or ‘relatable to people.’

 

 

What does she say?

 

 
“Probably my worst quality is that I get very passionate about what I think is right.

I’m fully comfortable with who I am, what I stand for, and what I’ve always stood for.”

 

 

=

 

Hillary Clinton

 

 

 

Look.

 

want vs need imperfectI fully understand that political campaigns are often about presenting appealing images and about covering up the personal quirks of a candidate trying to create what is needed for election.

 

 

Here is the crazy thing.

 

This is the same candidate who found out thru research the Hillary attributes that tested the highest were ‘tough, ready, strong’ <not … empathetic, sympathetic, cares about me>.

 

 

<thought bubble: “gee … which attributes better reflect a decision maker ??”

 

 

 

Look.

 

 

I am not endorsing any candidate … what I am saying is that what we want and what we need are often miles and miles apart.

 

Sometimes politics just reminds us of this.

 

 

Because we do it in business and in Life.

 

 

Let me stick with business.

 

 

Research has proven over and over again that appearances matter <sadly>. We see someone who LOOKS the part and immediately start giving them the benefit of the doubt with regard to the actions & behavior part <we also have a nasty habit of being more forgiving to those who look the part>.

 

 

Fighting our way thru this need & want quandary requires a little … well … it requires ruthlessness.

 

 

 

It requires us to analyze real truths rather than symbolic truths.

 

 

It requires us to say ‘no’ when we really want to say yes.

 

 

It requires us to value skills that some people don’t develop over an entire lifetime.

 

 

<insert thought bubble of … “Yeah Bruce, but why ruthlessness?”>

 

 

In a world where we’re constantly bombarded by advertising, public relations tough day 2and by people telling us what we do and do not need … you have to be frickin’ ruthless in figuring out how to fight your way through all the crap.

 

 

Well.

 

That sounds kind of sad doesn’t it?

 

 

It seems like it should take no ruthlessness because it should be so simple and innate to who and what we are … doesn’t it?

 

It is not simple.

 

It is work.

 

 

We must constantly evaluate what we see, hear, and even what we think, because only then will we be completely honesty with ourselves and see what we should see rather than what we want to see.

 

 

And even then it is difficult because we see flaws and imperfections, especially when viewing potential leaders, and feel some despair … or maybe we feel like we are ‘choosing between two imperfect choices’ and feel cheated.

 

We aren’t being cheated because there is no prefect choice.

 

 

And in seeking this perfection we continue to be constantly disappointed.

 

In today’s world this silly pursuit of someone who will ‘fix everything’ or ‘lead us out of this hole’ creates a sense of ‘dark times’

 

 

I sense it in Life today.

 

And I have certainly seen it in business organizations.

 

 

By the way … this need/want challenge bleeds into how we teach our young people entering into business.

 

 

“You need to learn to present well.”

 

 

“You need to dress well.”

 

 

You need to … well … just add a laundry list of things they ‘need’ to do and be in order to be the perfect employee and perfect candidate to be hired and promoted.

 

 

What they frickin’ need to do is embrace their imperfections and celebrate their strengths.

 

 

And what we older folk need to do is to teach them to embrace their imperfections and understand how to be the best they can be without trying to be something they do not want to be … or maybe try and be something they are not <or never will be>.

 

 

<sorry … got diverted with a how we treat young people rant>

 

 

Anyway.

 

 

We often create our own despair and darkness through crazy expectations.

 

Or maybe I should say we create this darkness & despair through a crazy inability to discern the difference between what we want and what we need.

 

 

At the risk of making some people disregard what I am saying I will use a fabulous Hilary Clinton quote <and, no, I am not endorsing her … just this thought …>:

 

 

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hope thread strong“It is often when night looks darkest, it is often before the fever breaks that one senses the gathering momentum for change, when one feels that resurrection of hope in the midst of despair and apathy.”

=

Hillary Clinton

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In business, in politics and in Life … we do not need leaders who are great at debating … or presenting … we need someone who can articulate an idea and figure out a way of creating the alignment necessary to make the idea, and ideas, happen.

 

Frankly … I don’t care what they look like and I don’t care if they are likeable or authentic or any of the crazy attributes media is trying to convince you that you “need” in a leader.

 

 

We should be seeking things we NEED and not what we want.

 

 

I tend to believe we more often than not through Life find what we need in some package we find a little less than desirable, or what we want, and therefore feel like we are getting cheated in some way.

 

voice of generation future

I could write an entire white paper on how society has created this ‘you can & should have it all’ attitude and how it has negatively affected what we actually get but suffice it to say … we are currently in this dark hole of unrealistic expectations driven by wants and not needs.

 

 

I take solace in the fact that despite the fact it feels like despair it is actually the constant fight we face with regard to doing the right thing and finding leaders who will make the difficult decisions and … well … lead.

 

 

Leaders come in all shapes and sizes and imperfections wrapped around some perfections which makes it difficult for most of us <me included>.

 

 

All I really know is that I need to ruthlessly attack what I think I want in the pursuit of finding what I need … in myself and in my leaders.

 

 

Ok.

 

I also know that this is a worthwhile effort.

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Written by Bruce