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“Let me win, but if I cannot win, let me be brave in the attempt.”

—-

Special Olympics motto

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“There are victories of the soul and spirit. Sometimes, even if you lose, you win.”

—

Elie Wiesel

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Okay. Competitiveness is a tricky thing.

No one wants “them to win.” And, surely, the bottom line for most people? “I want to win.” Which leads to an overall desire of “so I don’t lose.”

The tricky part is that winning doesn’t belong to you. It’s not just attitude I am talking about here.  Everyone has every right to it — to “the win”. Everyone. There is absolutely nothing wrong with trying to win, but at some point you need to remember that it isn’t everything. Winning isn’t as important as doing your best (even if best doesn’t equal winning).

So. Sounds easy? Sounds like common sense? Sure.

Those are the facts.

We know the facts.

We understand the facts.

We accept the facts.

That said. Facts being facts, everyone still has to deal with the personal feelings. Because the transition between “I want to win therefore I won’t lose” to “I lost.”, well, THAT is a humdinger of a personal transition.

Worse?

When winning is familiar (like … you win a lot … often enough that a part of you kind of expects to win). Why? Because familiar winning is addictive.

So. Daring to ask yourself “what if I lose?” or “what if the other team wins?” is huge.

And there begets the victory of soul and spirit and character.

We never know the answers to these questions. Mostly because most of us cannot not only picture losing ,but don’t want to (for fear it impedes the possibility of winning), No one wants to envision watching the other team win or maybe better said … “a win that has always belonged to me.”

That means finding victory in a loss is all about character.

Not being too proud to even think about those things as well as accept loss.

To find victory in the attempt is actually the thought.

Oh. And then there is the bigger picture. Life or long term victory.

First. Finding victory in the loss.

Downsizing. Decluttering life. Renting instead of owning. All those things sound an awful lot like “loss.”

And, yet, within each resides a victory. Independence? Freedom to move forward? Financial freedom? Renewed progress? Any and all those things.

A practical definition of ‘victory in loss’? Sure it is.

A true definition? You bet. And I don’t even call this “taking a step back to take two steps forward.” This is simply shedding to gain victory from. Maybe this is simply addition through subtraction. Whatever. It is victory. Period.

Anyway.

Second. The reality is we all need some victories.

Simply being brave in the attempt without ANY winning is difficult .. really difficult. This is where celebrating the small victories starts to matter. Yeah. I know much of the time we focus on lofty goals (and I admit … I write a lot about dreaming the impossible and dreams and aspirations). And those things are good.

But it’s equally important to focus on the small things you’ve achieved. It’s true because to sustain yourself over the long haul, you need to find happiness to motivate yourself along the long haul. So celebrate the victories of small goals for they add up to big goals.

What this all means is we don’t have to focus only on the huge earth-shattering goals and targets (BHAGs – big hairy audacious goals). It helps to seek out the little accomplishments you achieve for they represent being brave in the attempt. They may not seem like much to other people, but they’re huge to you (your soul & spirit).

Personal victories:

–          Kicking a bad habit

–          Losing 5 pounds

–          Overcoming a fear

–          Pushing yourself past your limits

–          Doing something uncomfortable  that you know is good for you (like public speaking)

–          Completing an assignment on time

–          Making your son smile after a tough day

–          Creating a business success (such as getting a business out of the red)

–          Creating a life turnaround (like losing weight and increasing your fitness level)

–          Getting out of debt and taking control of your financial life

And I would argue some of these are semi-huge victories. They are possibly only less ‘huge’ because they are personal, or internal, rather than public.

So maybe we should all reflect a little on what we have accomplished in the past months and days. And make sure you celebrate the small victories and make sure you actually celebrate the victory of the “brave attempt.”

Celebrate the victory of soul & spirit. And feel good about yourself a little more than maybe you may when you look in the mirror. I would argue the person in the mirror is more important than any trophy, ribbon or accolade you could receive by “winning.”

Oh. And don’t forget to lose with character. Because i can guarantee you the one thing you NEVER want to lose is your character because, in the end, whether you have more wins then losses or more losses than wins, you will ultimately be measured, be self & by others, by your character. So don’t lose it along the way.

Here you go. An odd close for me in one of my posts, but I found a Todd Rundgren song that had some nice lyrics:

We’ve been waiting so long,
we’ve been waiting for the sun to rise and shine
Shining still, give us the will
Bright as the day, show us the way.
Somehow, someday,
We need just one victory and we’re on our way.
Prayin’ for it all day and fightin’ for it all night
Give us just one victory, it will be all right.
You may feel about to fall but we go down fighting,
You will hear the call if you only listen
Underneath it all we are here together,
Shining still, give us the will
Bright as the day, show us the way.
Somehow, someday,
we need just one victory and we’re on our way
Prayin’ for it all day and fightin’ for it all night
Give us just one victory, it will be all right.

Just One Victory – Todd Rundgren

—————

“And the nights, bigger than imagining: black and gusty and enormous, disordered and wild with stars.”

—–

Donna Tartt 

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“This is the way the world ends

Not with a bang but a whimper.”

―

T.S. Eliot

==========

Well. Despite the fact most nights remain the same amount of hours, minutes and seconds day to day, a sleepless night can often look bigger than imagined. I have found that sleepless nights are less about restless minds and more about capacity in a squeezed space.

Huh?

Let me tackle squeezed first.

In general the world is a pretty vast place and our lives can seem fairly inconsequential.

The good news about this is that within all that vastness there is a lot of room to let some of the more horrible or horribly mundane crap just slip by.

The bad news occurs when all of a sudden Life, and the world, shrinks and you feel squeezed. And this can happen a lot easier than one may think.

Ponder what I am going to say as “the big squeeze.”

Everyday everyone faces some naturally occurring ‘shrinking’ aspects which in and of themselves can’t shrink your Life enough to matter. Let’s just say this is the daily grind of work, chores and family & Life commitments. Some things go well and some things don’t.

And then, of course, there will be a day or two where the things that “don’t” significantly outnumber the things that “do.” because this is day to day shit I view this as getting squeezed from the sides. They kind of suffocate you a little.

But set that aside for a moment.

And then there will be some days where you have that ad hoc shit you have to plan to get done — the faucet is dripping, the car engine light is on, someone hit the mailbox, crap like that. 95% of the time this kind of shit never goes as planned. It takes too long or it doesn’t get done right the first time or … well … suffice it to say … the easy stuff never gets done as easily as you would want.

And then, of course, there will be a day or two where the things that never get done as easily as you want actually end up just not going right. This is stupid little shit … but maybe think about it as maybe getting squeezed from underneath – an unexpected aggravating shift on the ground below you.

But set that aside for a moment.

And then there will be some days where you turn on the TV or maybe scan the internet news breaks and … well … some shit has hit the fan. Your country has made some monumental decision that seems to shift its place in the world.

Some nutjob terrorist has committed some heinous act to innocent people.

Some “thing” happens that feel like a shift in the bedrock of ‘what is.’ It may not directly affect you but you sense that it is a monumental thing which will most likely affect you <even though you aren’t sure how yet>. This is big shit … this just makes you feel a little like the weight of the world has gotten a little heavier and the world as you have known it has become a little murkier. You are getting squeezed from above.

But set that aside for a moment.

Now. I will now get to capacity.

Let’s assume on one day all there of things happen … you get squeezed all on one day. Oddly, this becomes a test of your capacity <which implies largeness>. And, yes, maybe it is about largeness. As in how large you can remain as you get squeezed.

Some nights it isn’t easy to not get suffocated.

Other nights you find your capacity and push back a little.

Most nights you find just enough largeness to not get, well, too little.

But the nights in which all three aspects I outlined squeezed you I would suggest the word ‘forlorn’ comes to mind. 

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“Oft hope is born when all is forlorn.”

J.R.R. Tolkien

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I use forlorn because I associate it with capacity as I am discussing it today. Forlorn has a sense of shrinking to it in that the good in Life seems to shrink and that which is bad seems to grow and you are left with that wretched forlorn feeling which dogs you throughout a sleepless night. Forlorn seems like it is more appropriate than lonely or lonesome in that it specifically embraces a senses of wretchedness and desertion or abandonment … in my mind … ‘despairing of the arrival of a friend … in this case … a friend called Hope.”

To me all of what I just shared with regard to squeezing and capacity captures the essence of the worst of the worst sleepless nights. And, if I were a betting man, I would bet we have all had a few of these.

Ok. Here is what I know.

Most of us get through these nights. Despite the vast emptiness of a night, more vast than we imagined it should be, we cast about among the chaos of the stars and find some light. I like to think of it as we clamber through the clouds and exist.

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“I will clamber through the clouds and exist.”

John Keats

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And the outcome of most of these nights, in addition to being tired, is out of the gauntlet of forlornness we seem to come out with a degree of hope. Hope for a better day <at minimum> and maybe Hope for something better <at maximum>.

In other words, out of the bigness which seems to squeeze us, if but for a moment, we rummage through a sleepless night … one black and gusty and enormous, disordered and wild with stars … and come out a little less black, a little more calm, a little more ordered and a little more focused on some star.

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“Not in the clamor of the crowded street, not in the shouts and applause of the many, but in ourselves, are triumph and defeat.”

–

Longfellow

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“Because to influence a person is to give him one’s own soul. He does not think his natural thoughts, or burn with his natural passions.

His virtues are not real to him. His sins, if there are such things as sins, are borrowed. He becomes an echo of some one else’s music, an actor of a part that has not been written for him.

The aim of life is self-development. To realize one’s nature perfectly-that is what each of us is here for. People are afraid of themselves nowadays. They have forgotten the highest of all duties, the duty one owes to one’s self. Of course they are charitable. They feed the hungry and clothe the beggar.

But their own souls starve, and are naked. Courage has gone out of our race. Perhaps we never really had it. “

—

Oscar Wilde

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Well. This is Life: shit happens. And, more importantly, inevitably shit happens to us. When that happens, the shit, suffice it to say … we all have a talk with our self.

Unfortunately, most times we have a shitty talk with ourself. Yeah. We tend to know diddleyshit about talking to ourself. At the root of our shittiness of self conversation is typically a variety of creatively destructive aspects:

You can blame external ‘forces’ <”not my fault”>.

You can blame yourself <blame spans lack of confidence to lack of skills>.

Let me stick with the latter <because only losers consistently think the former>.

To begin. What I will tell you is that when the shit hits the fan you can get a startling clear picture of who & what you are. And sometimes it ain’t pretty. And it ain’t pretty because we do not even begin the conversation right.

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“Some conversations are not about what they’re about.”

Anne Carson

==

More often than not the conversation you have with yourself aren’t the conversations you think they are. What I mean by that is when bad shit happens most of us, in the moment or near the moment, are thinking causally – stimulus/response stuff.

“Shit happened because this shit was done.”

At worst, this conversation with yourself, sounds something like “you stupid shit.”

Most of us can deal with that. It is really only later that the problems truly arise because that initial conversation continues and you start delving deeper & deeper inside yourself. Yeah. These shitty conversations are sometimes call ‘soul searching.’

I, instead, refer to them as ‘soul wrenching.’

During the deeper conversation you encounter doubt, fears of being good enough, imposter syndrome, self-uncertainty. These are the assholes you sometimes have a conversation with when bad shit happens. And, unfortunately, they all went to a debate school and unfortunately they all like to talk a lot when given the opportunity.

Here is what I have to offer <as someone who has certainly had his share of both bad shit happening and shitty conversations with myself – albeit I tend to believe all of us have>.

We spend far far <far> too much time in these conversations on comparison type shit.

Yeah. It is natural … I mean … well … how else can you decide whether you are worth a shit unless you compare yourself to someone who IS worth a shit? But, frankly, most of our sins are borrowed – just echoes of what is around us.

So when bad shit happens the conversation really should be about you and with you.

And therein lies the next level of a self shitty conversation. It is a little weird because it is a Life paradox.

In general, research shows over and over again that we overestimate our abilities … we think we are better than we really are at things. And, yet, when bad shit happens and we start having this shitty conversation with ourselves … we have a tendency to think of ourselves as flawed … not good  … flawed.

<figure that one out …. Will ya?>

Somehow you gotta find the middle ground in that paradox.

You have to first uncover a realistic perspective of whatever shit that happened and then focus on … well … moving on.

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“One does not walk into the forest and accuse the trees of being off-center,

Nor do they visit the shore and call the waves imperfect.

So why do we look at ourselves this way? “

Tao Te Ching

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I imagine I could just suggest here that bad shit happens, you have shitty conversations with yourself and that you should have these conversations with the non shitty aspects within you when it happens, but I kind of think what gets you through shit sometimes needs a little more ‘oomph’ to get you through it. The ‘oomph’ is rooted in the ‘moving on’ thought I just shared above.

I suggest something simple. It’s kind of a mindset. Not any ‘happy hippie shit Secret stuff’ just an attitude that can kind of get you through when bad shit happens.

I don’t know where I found this quote but I love it:

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“I didn’t come this far, to only come this far.”

Unknown

==============

I love it in its simplicity.

Bad shit happens.

In work and in Life.

And inevitably we have those shitty conversation with ourselves when bad shit happens.

But … you know what?

You didn’t get that far just to get that far.

None of us do.

And sometimes you just have to remember that and, possibly, one of the best times to remember that is when you are in the middle of a shitty conversation with yourself.

————————–

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“Half the world is composed of people who have something to say and can’t, and the other half who have nothing to say and keep on saying it.”

–

Robert Frost

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Well. This is about social media, what you put into the social media world and how you own what you write.

Now. I write a blog.

In fact. A couple thousand pieces and a couple million words worth of writing. In my mind … I have something to say and I say it. Maybe it all means nothing and as Frost suggests … I am one of those who have nothing to say but say it.

Regardless. If I say it … I own my words.

I say this because we are edging into a world where people are of an age that are shifting into leadership positions, positions of influence, who have blogs or have written for blogs. And, uh oh,  they are being demanded to justify their words, thoughts and ideas. In other words, they are being asked to own their words. They may have had nothing to say, but they said something and now they have to explain something about their nothing.

This is all incredibly interesting <and slightly amusing> to me because if you go online you will find thousands of writing advice columns <usually formatted in the heinous listicles and written by self righteous older people> written for the attention of young people warning them of the dangers of what they put online and how it can affect their future employment.

The amusing part? I found none <zero> advice columns directed toward … well … me <self righteous older people>.

And you know why? Because we older folk are supposed to know better.

Sadly.

Some of us do not know better.

There are lawyers seeking higher positions, business people seeking a seat in a C-level suite and even doctors seeking to shift into a more general business world who are finding that their words are following them <and they need to own them>.

And, no, “it was just my personal opinion on my personal blog” doesn’t hack it. If you shared a thought, you own the words in how you shared it, therefore, you own the thought AND the words. Period.

To be fair … I will spend a second in the tricky part.

Is the past a predictor?

Should we waste our time revisiting the blog writings of someone who most likely sat down and vented personal thoughts on things of matter?

And … maybe more importantly … should we be held accountable for words we decided to put down and share on the world wide web?

Simplistically I would say … of course we should be held accountable for the words then just as, of course, what we said then may be different than what we would say now and we need to own those words too <and justify the difference>.

Simplistically I would say … it is indefensible to solely make a stand on ‘you said it because you can’ and , simplistically, it is indefensible to simply say ‘that was then and this is now.’

My point? If you write, you own the words. Therefore, use words with care.

I don’t have time for many blogs, the daily diaries, the motivational tripe, the pieces that don’t really have a point, emotional directionless solution-lacking pieces … these have some value in some ways, but they aren’t really the potent things <albeit … you own those words too so be careful>.

But many blogs are there to make a point. And if you make a point, you own it.

Oh. And … you own the words you use to make that point.

I make no mistake when I post something in that I know when I open my mind and share my words they represent a potent formula that can be drunk with pleasure or peril. I know whether it is a large presentation, a one-on-one discussion or a 998 word post on my blog I am doing so as a public speaker.

I own my words. I own my thoughts.

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“Words are singularly the most powerful force available to humanity. We can choose to use this force constructively with words of encouragement, or destructively using words of despair. Words have energy and power with the ability to help, to heal, to hinder, to hurt, to harm, to humiliate and to humble.”

Yehuda Berg

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I am surprised when older people get trapped in business discussions having to discuss things they may have written. I am surprised because I know when I write and share those words I can use these words as a constructive force or a destructive force. And with either path I own what I construct as well as own what I deconstruct.

Now. What also surprises me a little is that older people who have blogs or write opinion pieces are not young inexperienced people but, if you are making a point, you really do know that simply ranting or using some childish phrasing or hyperbolic rhetoric diminishes what you have to say.

And I say that knowing I am free with the swear words and generous with snarkiness.

But what helps me is that I have found over time that conceptually I write in the same framework as I learned how to communicate in the professional world. Stylistically it is me … all me <maddening to some people who visit the site>, but the framework resides in what I have always believed is the most simplistic way to create a simple message.

Sure. I may not communicate what I want to say simply, but underneath the swear words, the snarkiness, the faux intellectualism and the casual use of grammar resides a desire to hit what I have always believed is the message simplicity bullseye <by the way … anyone, blogger, opinion writer and even a communications agency can use this simplistic guide>.

The bullseye.

On one axis, the horizontal, you are bookended in framing.

On one end is whatever issue & solution I can offer — functionally what I have to offer <my experience, my ideas, my thinking> — followed in toward the bullseye by … well … me, the writer, and who I am and what I stand for <so that my thinking gets filtered through who and what I am … lets call that my character>.

On the other end is the need or want – functionally what is needed – followed in toward the bullseye by what the situation, or people, may desire <or think they desire> so that pragmatism gets filtered through the sometimes random irrational minds of people.

The other axis, the vertical, is even simpler … hero, conflict and resolution. It is basic story telling applied to ideas.

I want to offer a hero <it can be an idea> which can enter into a conflict unflinchingly, or flinchingly if appropriate, and offer a resolution. Simple stories work the best and, as one writer articulated it … “incorporate elements of hero, conflict, and goal.”

All this permits me even in my most dry pieces to attempt to offer my version of a story which, as stories are supposed to do, address deeper and enduring emotional levels tapping into personal  “issues” such as self-esteem <conformity versus individuality>, self-doubt and economic wellbeing.

Everyone who writes should have a story. They shouldn’t toss out words thoughtlessly, or worse, irreverently.

Anger doesn’t guide a good story <typically>, but as long as you continue to aim forward the bullseye even an anger driven critique can end up in an okay place when viewed by someone in the future.

And all of that matters if you assume at some point someone will demand you own your words.

The story formula is simple:

1. Pick what matters <a conflict>
2. Offer a distinct meaningfully view, hero and resolution
3. Imbue with your personality & character <which will inevitably be captured in the hero aspects>.

I could argue, and I would, that if you stay within this framework what you write today will be representative of something you want to say tomorrow. You may not want to say exactly the same thing today, or tomorrow, as you did in the past but you will most likely be able to leverage from the past to what you want to say.

I mention this today not just to share my framework for writing, but rather because many people my age, or slightly younger, are being measured more and more by the words they shared online. And more and more of them are finding that they have to choose between what they believe in <most likely reflected in something they wrote in the past> and what they need to say to get what they want in the moment.

That seems kind of nuts to me … that choice I mean.

What I want today should be aligned with what I believe in. I can take a fairly hard stance on a variety of issues, and I have, but I also hope that my heroes & resolutions reflect adaptability to other’s views and the situation at hand. When I do meet new business people or people I haven’t seen in a while and sometimes they bring up something I have written … well … let’s say 5 years ago … I am good. I am okay with it. I may not think exactly what I did then, but my basic beliefs have not changed.

It surprises me when some fairly qualified people have not assumed that stance in what they have written.

And. I certainly have no patience for those who are more than willing to toss out their own past words as “I said that then but now …” or “I wish I had chosen my words more carefully.”

I will not suggest we should all get our words right every time <I surely don’t> but not all words are created equal and the really important ones … the potent ones … the ones that can construct or deconstruct … you should get right.

Well. At least right enough that someday in the future your career will not hang in the balance over a poorly thought out blog piece. Conversely, if you did think it out and your career can hang in the balance over it … well … you made a stand.

And backing off that stand simply to get to where you want to be is … well … not good.

My writing style, or lack of style, aside. I don’t understand ever being ‘trapped’ by owning your own words if you have decided to be “true to thineself” no matter what. I said something then and maybe I could have used better words but the basic thought premise is what I believe. Take it or leave it because getting the job, sitting at some table in a discussion, getting something I want doesn’t mean that thought can be discarded … if I believe it … well … I own it.

I will admit that owning up can be difficult but, as I once said, mistakes or things you have said in the past can be an awful lot like a hurricane … and “I” is always at the center of a hurricane — stay steady and hold the center.

I have no time and I have no patience for older people who do not own their words. And they should be ashamed of themselves for discarding thoughts and words so easily just to get something they want now. Thoughts and words are far too valuable to be that disposable.

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“How are you going to meet life when you have passed through here and are so-called educated? Do you want to be swallowed up by the society, the culture in which you live, or are you going to oppose it, revolt against it, which will be a reaction and not a total action? Are you going to step into the easy way of life, conform, imitate, adjust to the pattern, whatever that pattern be, whether it be the establishment, or an establishment of a different kind, and so on? Or are you going to be a totally different human being, who is aware and knows he has to meet adversity and opposition and that, therefore, there is no easy way to satisfaction? Because most of us want a life of ease, of comfort, without trouble, which is almost impossible. And if you do meet opposition, will you run away from it?”

J. Krishnamurti

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Education systems have some significant flaws, but I am not sure we speak about the effect a flawed education system has on a citizenry psychologically often enough.

If you look at a lot of research these days, you will see many people are feeling skepticism in the value of education and, in particular, college. This whole discussion then seems to devolve into a simplistic argument between the haves and the have nots – the stupid people versus the non-stupid people (or, less harshly, the unenlightened versus the enlightened). It devolves into a suggestion of ‘brains versus no brains’. It’s, well, dumb.

On that thought I would argue there is no link between population and intelligence (research even says there isn’t) or even a link between geography and intelligence. What I would suggest is that a sense of ‘fatalism’ affects the potential of one’s intelligence. In other words, dormant intelligence – due to fatalism – is simply wasted potential.

Let me explain Fatalism in 2 parts

Fatalism version 1.

If you are in white middle class, you may expect to get a little more simply by standing still where you are, therefore,

you believe any extraneous variables are irrelevant to that ‘more’.  This may psychologically encourage you to believe if you ‘stand still, save energy & resources’ you will be fine. Now. Most people throw a lot of stuff into the ‘stand still.’ They work a regular job, take care of their home, are involved in family & community in some way and, well, you get it. The ‘stand still’ is simply a metaphor for ‘taking care of Life as it exists.’

This is where fatalism rears its ugly head.

Education and learning doesn’t work this way. Standing still means, well, getting ‘dumber.’ <to be harsh>. Knowledge is constantly evolving, morphing and reconfiguring what you know today, as it exists in totality, will be obsolete tomorrow. Yet, we have sold in education as ‘preparation for life’ in a world in which most people are just trying to keep their heads above water with everyday responsibilities. Re-engaging with ‘what you learned’ and finding its obsolete suggests the system failed you. This feeling gets exacerbated by the fact there are  people constantly engaged and learning so a perceived, and sometimes real, knowledge gap increases between those investing in learning and those who are not. Please note that this is not about smarts, intelligence or IQ, more often it is about real Life choices – disengaging from the grind of the day & Life, or not.

The fatalism is found in the thought that education is not an effective preparation for Life (particularly a higher education where dollar ROI steps in). This decreases its perceived value. At exactly the same time the brain (people) seek to have a value equation in their heads (assessing investment & return). What I mean by that is as the education value decreases, ‘common sense’ or practical experience (or, simplistically, not having a higher education) increases in perceived value. And. This value assessment has a halo effect not only to education itself but to those who elect the other path, gaining that education, and devaluing the people who do invest in education.

In other words.

If the education system failed me (and I am smart), it has little value not only to me but to other people … but at least I was smart enough to not invest as much energy as that other elitist dupe.

There is little faith in the system, therefore, there is a certain fatalism built into actually participating in the system.

Fatalism version 2.

If you are poor, you expect no matter how hard you work, no matter how much education you get, your circumstances are not likely to change significantly. And you know what? They are right. Regardless. While almost everyone knows a good education is an appealing choice to get out of your circumstances, most people actually view it in a gambler’s assessment way.

But this belief by the poor has seeped into the consciousness of white working class (lower middle income segment).

“The enduring narrative of the American dream is that if you study and get a college education and work hard, you can get ahead. The survey shows that many white working-class Americans, especially men, no longer see that path available to them. … It is this sense of economic fatalism, more than just economic hardship, which was the decisive factor in support for Trump among white working-class voters.”

Robert P. Jones, the CEO of PRRI

This is NOT an intelligence issue. I can say that maybe less than 3% of all Americans have IQs lower than 70 <which is a line for mentally challenged> and we know that the average <or the mean> is somewhere around 100 which means, well, the significant majority of Americans are certainly capable ‘being smart.’ This would suggest the system is failing capable people. Heck. Even Americans in the middle class who attend college exhibit profound ignorance:

A report in 2007 published by the Intercollegiate Studies Institute found that on average 14,000 randomly selected college students at 50 schools around the country scored under 55 (out of 100) on a test that measured their knowledge of basic American civics. Less than half knew that Yorktown was the last battle of the American Revolution. Surprisingly, seniors often tested lower than freshmen. (The explanation was apparently that many students by their senior year had forgotten what they learned in high school.)

On the basis of their comprehensive approach, Delli Carpini and Keeter concluded that only 5% of Americans could correctly answer three-fourths of the questions asked about economics, only 11% of the questions about domestic issues, 14% of the questions about foreign affairs, and 10% of the questions about geography. The highest score? More Americans knew the correct answers to history questions than any other. Still, only 25% knew the correct answers to three-quarters of the history questions, which were rudimentary.

In 2003, the Strategic Task Force on Education Abroad investigated Americans’ knowledge of world affairs. The task force concluded: “America’s ignorance of the outside world” is so great as to constitute a threat to national security.

Look. This topic matters as we think about how to speak with people. I will say that among the dozens of research studies post-2016 election I found some number about the working class and education that made me sit up a little and think.

In an analysis by the Public Religion Research Institute and The Atlantic 54% of white working-class Americans said investing in college education is a risky gamble, including 61% of white working-class men.

(I will note that white working-class voters who held this belief were almost twice as likely as their peers to support Trump)

In addition. Those with right-leaning political beliefs were the most likely to think college unnecessary. When it came to income, the middle classes did not think college was necessary, while the poorest and the wealthiest respondents still thought it did. Results to this question also varied according to race: 60% of Hispanics still think college is necessary; compared with 51% of blacks and 44% of whites.

Let me suggest two aspects with regard to Fatalism version 2:

• Failure in the system
• Hope in the system

If you believe the system has failed you in some way, you look down on the people who may have benefited from the system (they had an advantage you didn’t have) as well as doubt the system.

If you see the system as a stepping stone for the future, you place hope in the system (flaws and all).

One has given up and the other hasn’t.

One sees it as misplaced trust, and hope, and the other places hope in the system and, therefore, trusts it in some form or fashion.

I would suggest where you and on the failure/hope spectrum decides your fatalism.

Regardless. I have one word to conclude with in addressing this fatalism– context.

The fact is we, the people, may not have changed that much BUT the world around us has – & demands something different from us (and, consequently, the education system).

Contrary to expectations, by many measures the surveys showed the level of ignorance remaining constant over time:

In the 1990s, political scientists Michael X. Delli Carpini and Scott Keeter concluded that there was statistically little difference between the knowledge of the parents of the Silent Generation of the 1950s, the parents of the Baby Boomers of the 1960s, and American parents today (y some measures, Americans are dumber today than their parents of a generation ago.)

If our ignorance has not changed, one would have to assume our fatalism is actually a failure not necessarily in the system itself, but rather in our lack of context (perceptions).

Yes. The world environment has changed. But what makes people successful has not. It is, and always has been, a combination of effort, persistence, thinking & doing. I don’t believe Life has a formula but I would suggest if you manage these ingredients well you may not necessarily have boundless success, but you will absolutely increase the odds of success.

That said.

I think we talk about the education system incorrectly and we far too often ignore the psychological underpinnings of a fatalistic view of education. It may sound trite but the trick to solving part of our education problem may be in, well, attitudes. If we can disrupt fatalistic attitudes, in combination with some changes to the system itself, well, maybe we can educate to maximize everyone’s potential. hat, to me, sounds like a worthy objective.

=====

“What I hate is ignorance, smallness of imagination, the eye that sees no farther than its own lashes. All things are possible. Who you are is limited only by who you think you are.”

–

Egyptian Book of the Dead

======

There is gobs of advice information on how to communicate authentically but, in reality, authenticity comes from the soul; it comes naturally. So. I am dubious with regard to the value of the advice ‘how to be authentic’ information.

Anyway. I actually prefer discussing all of this is ‘being genuine.’

I call it genuine because authentic has become bullshit. Authentic has become business. It has become something you can learn to be – like a skill.

That’s nuts.

Frickin’ nuts.

To me it all started going awry through entertainers and people in the spotlight. I imagine every person who dances in the spotlight of fame gets coached and scripted and sculpted for the masses before stepping up to a podium or agreeing to accept the microphone and say something. I call it the ‘polishing of authenticity’. I will also call it, well, ungenuine.  I would also suggest we don’t want scripted from the people we suggest we want to know about or just know.

Ah.

‘suggest’

Here is where Authentic really goes off the rails. While yearning for this thing we call ‘authentic’, we also relentlessly parse each tone, syllable, gesture, word & thought <although mostly that is speculation on our part on with regard to what they really meant when they said what they said>. And that is where this whole thing gets slightly odd <or absurd … if not sad>.

We cannot tell what is genuine and what is not, what is authentic and what is not. That is just batshit crazy.  So we ask for ‘authenticity, seek authenticity, yet remain overly cynical of anyone actually offering authenticity and, worse, critique it fragment by fragment.

I put this in the same category as transparency. The only way to be transparent & believable is to be radically transparent. Similarly the only way to be authentic & believable is to be radically authentic.

Whew boy.

Ponder that.

Ponder how willing you are to be ‘believably authentic’ or, in my terms, ‘believably genuine.’

Ok. Let me make an example. Risking some shit from my readers, let me talk about Katy Perry <or even her ex,

Russell Brand> and authenticity and being genuine.

While people step up and speak as earnestly as possible and share truth and we consistently doubt them, there is Katy Perry who steps up in a slightly wacky persona <which you have to know is slightly scripted at minimum> and within the wackiness, uhm, seamlessly slides into a serious thought <reminder: she was quite articulate & ‘smart’ during the 2016 election>.  People got confused. Well. Some people did. How could this wacky entertainer, sometimes quirky, be smart and articulate and serious.? Well. One would almost suggest she was, uhm, being authentic in all aspects of who and what she is.

Look. I am fairly sure she is one of the more truly authentic people out in the public eye today.

I just think it’s a little out of whack that we doubt the sincere and accept the absurd.

I just think it’s a little out of whack we doubt seriousness and only see the nonseriousness.

I also think it’s a little out of whack how much we listen or do not listen for ‘things’ (cues to judge).

What I mean by that is we listen very very <very> hard for things in which we can turn to and point out flaws & ‘lies’ & things that make the person saying them ‘less than.’ And, yet, we don’t seem to listen as hard for the nuggets they share in which we can look at them and think ‘more than.’ Well. That would seem to say more about us then them, no?

Ponder.

Every time she speaks she is entertaining.

Every time she performs she seems to love what she does.

Every time she has an opportunity … she offers up something bigger & more important.

How is that different from anyone being authentic? Isn’t that almost the definition of genuine?

You speak to engage.

You genuinely agree with what you say and how you feel about what you are doing.

Every time you genuinely feel like you have something to contribute – you offer it.

Yet. The price to being authentic seems to be she isn’t being heard for the really important stuff.

Yet. the price YOU pay to being authentic seems to be you are not being heard for the really important stuff.

What a wacky world we live in these days. Who knew authentic would be so difficult.

Yes. I purposefully chose a lightning rod ‘Hollywood liberal’ to make a point. Choose your own lightning rod and see if I don’t have a point.

Anyway.

Maybe we should listen to the people who get the microphone shoved in front of their face with a little less cynicism.

Maybe we should seek to find a little more trust that some people truly are trying to tell us the truth.

Maybe we need to get better at discerning genuine versus ‘faux authenticity’ (practiced sincerity … as if that is a ‘thing’).

Maybe we need to remember you can only see as far as you think <and only hear as much as you unthink>.

Lastly. A cautionary note for businesses & brands. Brands are not people, but genuine is genuine. Deciding to ‘be authentic’ is not something you ‘decide’, you just, well, are (or you are not). My caution is the natural cynicism people have about authenticity. Because if you noted that point above, and you nodded your head, well, take note that in business that cynicism increases exponentially. That cynicism demands you don’t ‘be authentic’; it actually demands that you are authentic.

Which permits me to end where I began. You can ‘be authentic’ and maybe you can learn some faux skill to be authentic, but if you are authentic you are genuine. And genuine is invaluable in the world of business.

==

“Our humanity is not an attribute that we have received once and forever with our conception. It is a potentiality that we have to discover within us and progressively develop or destroy through our confrontation with the different experiences of suffering that will meet us through our life.”

—

Xavier Le Pichon

==

“You’ll have to help yourself.”

—

Lemony Snicket

===

This is about us. People. Individuals. Ok. Let’s call it “the power of I.”

Oh. And the fact we either grow or diminish what we have in terms of “I”. So. That begs the question … what is the power each of us have?

I would suggest that your power is actually a reflection of your character <and its resilience>. Character actually begets all the shit we truly care about: resiliency, personal responsibility, integrity, morality. In addition … it is character that dictates whether, and how, you either progressively develop or diminish.

And therein lies the true power of I.

Yet, we face an inherent ongoing challenge to this power. What do I mean? Character is not solid; it can get chipped.

What I mean by that is once you start taking shortcuts, the ones that appear to make the Life travel a little easier, a little cheat here … a little lie there… maybe a little taking advantage of the system … all of which chips a little of your integrity & character away. Now. That may not seem so bad, but, character is a non-renewable resource.

In addition. Each time you take a shortcut, no matter how small, and get away with it, it becomes even easier to decide to do it another time – that’s the slippery slope of character erosion.

Just think about what I just wrote for a minute.

You can be crappy at reading, writing and arithmetic or pretty much anything that people bitch about all the time, but you can’t effectively survive by being crappy at Life itself. And you certainly cannot get along with a crappy character.

You have to fight the good fight in Life, try and avoid the short cuts, and maintain your character and have faith, and courage, to keep character from eroding in the face of Life. Surprisingly … this is an ongoing fight day in and day out week after week.

Now. That said. Character is a tricky thing to self assess. Interestingly … we all think we know ourselves well, but, psychological studies show otherwise. In fact, <unfortunately> most of us are somewhat deluded about ourselves. And in that delusion we tend to be slightly misguided with regard to what we should do and how to do it <because the basic premise of who we are is flawed>.

This is really really important for us to think about because research has clearly linked social mobility to social and emotional skills. Emotional skills ranging from empathy and the ability to make and maintain relationships, mental toughness, delayed gratification and self-control all contribute to social mobility <and Life success>.

These research findings all point to the same conclusion — that character counts. Now. Research also points out that character is developed not necessarily instilled <experienced versus taught>.

Research shows that people who overcome adversity and realize their full potential tend to exhibit many of the same traits.

Traits that can be thought of as a belief in one’s ability to achieve, an understanding of the relationship between effort and reward, the patience to pursue long-term goals, the perseverance to stick with the task at hand, and the ability to bounce back from life’s inevitable setbacks.

Please note this does not suggest negative experiences increase character but rather that multiple experiences create depth of character (despite being a common wisdom quote, research has never show a relationship with “what hurts you make you stronger”). These various traits all fall under the broad heading of “character and resilience.”

Well. That said. If character is about experience then I get to bitch a little about personal accountability or personal responsibility. Or, in other words, responsibility for your own actions.

Today it seems like a shitload of people suggest their actions, faults, any excessive unacceptable behavior, or any … well … generally heinous or unacceptable behavior … are a reflection of outside influences, society driven/motivated, challenging home growing up, poverty, ethnicity, or any experience that we can identify as ‘generated pain’ which inevitably impacted us in childhood. Let’s title all of that under one big fat heading of “excuse.”

It is almost like no one, okay, far too many, wants to accept responsibility for their problems.

All I can think is that some people, well, this is what they learned. Which makes me ask, well, “who the hell taught them this?”

Anyway. On the other hand I know for sure that some of us learn that when you screw up it is on ‘you’ and no one else. This ‘learning’ teaches us that basically you can be frequently wrong, frequently stupid, frequently imperfect, but if you have been taught to be accountable — to admit it– you may get some shit from people but you will also be known as someone who is accountable for their own actions. You assume responsibility for all the good and bad that you do.

Yeah. This can be harrowing at times and incredibly rewarding at other times.

—————

“If your success is not on your own terms, if it looks good to the world but does not feel good in your heart, it is not success at all.”

Anna Quindlen

—————–

And this leads me to destiny, fate … and resilience.

Well. I believe we make our own destinies. A destiny may await us but we need to go & do things, to make choices, in order to actually get to our destiny.

Every day we are presented with choices.

Some we don’t even recognize.

Some we don’t even see <until they are past>.

Some we see and make a choice.

Our destiny is a reflection of these choices … made and not made.

This means making your destiny is hard because we see, and don’t see, choices and make, and don’t make, choices.

“Of course it’s hard! If it was easy, everyone would do it. Hard is what makes it great.”

<For the Love of the Game>

This is a Life truth. Shit. It is true about everything we do <even making the perfect cup of coffee in the morning>.

And that is where resilience comes into play.

Because you will always have disappointments. You will always have dreams that don’t come true. You will always have bad shit happening. And you will always make some bad choices.

And in all of what I just wrote we have a habit of getting stuck.

You get stuck knowing what you already know.

You get stuck on what happened in the past.

You get stuck thinking about shit that you cannot do anything about.

You get stuck on disappointments, dreams that don’t come true and bad choices.

We just get … well … stuck.

Resilience is all about being able to overcome all the simple tragedies you face in life. Not the big dramatic shit just the everyday shit.

=====

Brooke:

George Bernard Shaw once wrote, “There are two tragedies in life. One is to lose your heart’s desire. The other is to gain it.”

Nathan:

As far as I’m concerned, Shaw was a punk.

‘Cause you know what? Tragedies happen. What are you gonna do? Give up? Quit?

No. I realize now that when your heart breaks, you gotta fight like hell to make sure you’re still alive. ‘Cause you are, and that pain you feel, that’s life.

The confusion and fear, that’s there to remind you that somewhere out there is something better. And that ‘something’ is worth fighting for.

=====

Resilience really isn’t about hope or dreams or vision for what you want & desire and doing what you need to do to stay on that path. Resilience is more about recognizing Life is hard and the practicality that if you want to make some progress and develop … you gotta fight like hell to not get stuck.

Simplistically you take personal responsibility for not getting stuck.

And you now what? You have to. Because Life makes it really really easy to get stuck. You can get stuck on so many things it is scary if you think about it. But you can really only get stuck if you let it happen.

Progress is, more often than not, in your hands. Which means your destiny is in your hands. That, my friends, is the power of I; a power driven by the engine of Character. Yes. Character is your destiny.

—

“It is not the strongest of the species that survive, not the most intelligent, but the one most responsive to change.”

=

Charles Darwin

—————————-

Survival. A topic we all care about. This quote should make everyone think about Life as well as with their business. I love this quote mostly because those with ‘brawn’ scoff at those with ‘brains’, and the ‘brains’ scoff at the ‘brawn’, when survival (and that doesn’t have to mean life & death, but rather success or failure) is being played out.

Regardless of the side someone is on, both brawn & brain believe they have the advantage regardless of the situation in terms of survival. But. Chuck (as Darwin was called to his closest friends) suggests you don’t have to be the sharpest knife in the drawer nor do you have to be the strongest tool in the drawer to survive. You just have to be flexible. Responsive to what is happening. Have a willingness to adapt to the situation.

Flexibility is certainly an advantage if you have the desire to succeed at anything you do (ask any coach). We all face times when we have to deal with situations that do not “fit in” to our routine or our ‘comfort zone.’ I say “tough noogies” (not sure exactly what that means, but I bet you get the point).

Adapt or die.

Just ponder. One of the most frustrating things in life is when you have done your best and yet things still go wrong. Or maybe you didn’t get to where you wanted to get to (what you were ultimately aiming for).

You have to be flexible.

You have to adapt.

You have to have the ability to fit into a changed situation … or … to modify your behavior & actions accordingly to fit the changed situation.

And if you don’t? If instead you stubbornly hold on to some things that don’t work, and stubbornly repeat mistakes (because it matches best practices or “what worked in that past“) this inflexibility will cause failure (or simply not reaching what it is you were aiming for which is a derivative of some type of failure). By the way, in other words, continuous behavior along those lines means you will not survive.

Ultimately you have to decide to do things differently to experience different results.

Easy? Nope. It can be uncomfortable. It can be emotionally draining.

We know that when we are asked to change again and again, the physical and psychological reaction, which is actually excessive stimulation to the system, puts our ability to adapt under massive strain. All the change produces stress and carries with it a physical and emotional price tag. The more radical the change — the bigger the price tag.

Excessive stimulation has at least three levels: sensory, cognitive and decisional. To help us function <or survive>, each of us has developed strategies, or destimulation tactics, to lower the level of stimulation when we feel uncomfortably close to the limits of our adaptive range. We use these tactics every day, often unconsciously. Yet. By becoming conscious of them we can increase their effectiveness. By examining our own responses to overstimulation we can learn ways of consciously influencing change. We can begin by influencing small events, then expand our influence to larger patterns of experience. All these mental tactics are designed to detach from the shit … and rise above all that you are today so that you can be the best you can be tomorrow.

To do all of this you need to be aware. You need to not only be prepared to recognize when change needs to occur (typically there is a threshold on where you need to stop fighting the change or risk falling so far behind you cannot catch up or just be ‘eliminated’ at that time … oh … that survival thing) but you also need to be ready to change.

Look. Everyone has the capability to change. In fact I have a nifty chart which shows how most people accept & accommodate change.

Its pretty simple but shows that we need to work through the different levels of response to effect change. I would imagine there are several points to be made but here are the two from me:

–          you learn as you move through each phase at each point actually changing how you think about future problems/challenges to further change

–          you can get stuck anywhere in any phase at any time (the nifty chart actually helps show how easy it is to NOT change because you get stuck somewhere).

So. As change is introduced to you & your life you are forced through all four levels. I would imagine the most important thought would be to attain the fourth level as quickly as possible.

Anyway. Survival, and change, pretty much always depends on the most basic first step – believe that you are able to make the changes.  And take the first step.

Without that? You have the thought, but no action.

And the result of no action? Lack of survival again.

All that said. I tend to believe a lot of people will read the Darwin quote and seek to find meaning within ‘survival of the fittest’ bigger picture. I have some strange advice (coming from me).

Think small.

Think day-to-day.

Think “me.”

Think that survival is about adapting to the environment around you.

Think adapting means “initiating a new order of <personal> things ….”

—

“It must be considered that there is nothing more difficult to carry out, nor more doubtful of success, nor more dangerous to handle, than to initiate a new order of things.

For the reformer has enemies in all those who profit by the old order, and only luke-warm defenders in all those who profit by the new order.

This luke-warmness arises partly from fear of their adversaries, who have the laws in their favor, and partly from the incredulity of mankind, who do not truly believe in anything new until they have had an actual experience of it”.

Machiavelli

=

Bottom line.

Always think about how can you adapt.

By the way, I am not suggesting (and I believe Chuck Darwin wasn’t either) 100% change to adapt (although some situations demand it). Successful change typically begins by pinpointing anchors of stability (one you either have or can develop) which help to make the transition change not only viable, but more likely successful for you.

Regardless. Make change your constant companion and friend.

==============

“Souls are funny things. They stay constant even when the outside changes, or when the heart makes mistakes.

Souls don’t really care about good or bad, right or wrong — they’re just true.”

—

Miranda July

=============

“Lies and half-truths fall like snow, covering the things that I remember, the things I saw.

A landscape, unrecognisable after a snowfall; that is what she has made of my life.”

—

Neil Gaiman

============

“If you cannot find the truth right where you are, where else do you expect to find it?”

–

Dogen

==================

Well. I almost called this “if you cannot find the truth right where you are” because it sure seems like we like to look for truth, the harshest truths, somewhere else other than where we are. Ok. What I mean by ‘where we are’ is  within us.

I admit it seems kind of crazy to look anywhere but within because, ultimately, the stability and security and outcome of our souls, ourselves I imagine, need to be grounded in some self truth:

No lies.

No bullshit.

No ‘wishes.’

Just harsh unfettered truth.

In order to be greater than the turmoil of life.

In order to stand unwavering in the storm of life.

In order to not flinch in the face disasters in Life.

Just harsh unfettered truth.

This harsh unfettered truth gives us a space. It’s kind of like the eye of a hurricane.

We draw some lines.

We create some limits.

We place some margins as a buffer.

At the center?

Just harsh unfettered truth.

I use harsh purposefully. Self reflection is always difficult. It’s tough facing some shit you most likely don’t want to face.

And admitting it?               Whew.

That’s where harsh truly comes in.

You come face to face with some shit you more than likely would rather not face about yourself and then, well, you admit that what you face is you. Well. That is, more often than not, harsh.

In fact so harsh you flinch a little.

But, in flinching internally at this point, you are empowered to not flinch when facing outwards.

You have faced your sins.

You faced your flaws.

You faced your failures.

You faced the harsh unfettered truth.

=====================

“I speak my own sins; I cannot judge another. I have no tongue for it.” 

Arthur Miller

============

I will say this. Any hope of greatness always resides within, not with out. And I would argue the harshest evaluation of your hope’s chances resides within the harsh unfettered truth within.

Now. All of this may sound like personal Life thinking. It is not.

I use these same words these days with business people about businesses and companies.

In today’s world in which there seems to be no black and white and only grays.

In today’s world in which there seems to be no facts and only what is called common sense.

In today’s world in which there seems to be no truth and only lies & liars.

In today’s world … those who strip themselves naked of anything but truth will stand out not for their nakedness but rather for their clarity of who and what they are. These will be deemed the true authentic and the true credible and the true commendable or capable of winning favorable acceptance in people’s minds.

That is a harsh unfettered truth for the few who desire distinction and success in today’s world. Well. It is the harsh unfettered truth for those who want to make their soul a little less tricky.

All that said.

Don’t flinch from your harsh unfettered truth for it contains your destiny. I do not care if you think about this as a person or as a business … just think about it. And remembered. Souls are funny things which truly can only be found by facing harsh unfettered truth.

==============

“Just remember, if you flinch from your destiny, you’ll never achieve your true greatness — you didn’t choose to be chosen, but being chosen means you have to choose.”

–

Charlie Jane Anders

============

============

“And our team is mature enough to understand that, to have perspective and to feel fortunate for this opportunity.”

—-

Ron Turcotte

===========

Opportunities. Suffice it to say we all seek opportunities. I would also suggest because we tend to think about opportunities like wishes granted by rubbing some magic genie bottle we associate some fabulous concepts to them:

Fate.

Destiny.

Hard work.

Making your own luck.

Look. I think it’s a little crazy when people say they deserve a chance or deserve an opportunity or even because they ‘worked hard’ that opportunity was deserved in some way. To be clear. I believe society should be fair in that if you present yourself, put forth the effort, you should get an opportunity.

But. While opportunities always exist, you are not guaranteed to get them. Life is indifferent to you. So, yes, sometimes you can do all the right things, work hard, be smart, and while some opportunities may come your way, well, they just will not be ‘the’ opportunities that can make the positive difference in your Life.

Therefore. If you get an opportunity, feel fortunate <and do your best to not waste it>. For some reason I believe a lot of people will find that thought debatable. Maybe it feels a little to, well, passive. But here is the truth. 6billion+ people are all striving for something better and some of those billions may actually want to be in the same place seeking the same opportunities as you and, well, you cannot all be in the same place at the same time even while seeking the same thing.

===========

“…. I just have to ride him accordingly. I don’t think anyone can tell a jockey what to do. I had a free hand when I was riding most of the time, but when they tie your hand and give you orders to be placed somewhere or do this or do that — ‘I want you to lay third,’ or ‘I want you to lay fourth’ — it might be 10 horses in the race, and nine of them have the same orders.”

===========

Or.

===

“We can’t all be in the same place, so when the gate opens, you’re on your own.”

Turcotte

==========

So many times we say ‘this is the way to win’, but, you know what? Everyone is trying to win.

Oftentimes winning is about context and managing the moment.

Someone can tell you ‘this is the way to do it’, but … trust me … in Life you have to use a free hand to win the race.

Lastly.

It is silly to suggest there isn’t some competition in Life. We may not like it and there are certainly unhealthy dimensions, yet, compete we do. And we will also compete over opportunities and because we do so we will view them in a variety of ‘win or lose’ dimensions.

This leads me to Humility. Or maybe the simple acceptance of what happens.

The year was 1965, and Turcotte, then 23, was aboard a horse named Tom Rolfe, whom he had ridden to a Preakness win after a third-place finish in the Kentucky Derby. Turcotte made his move too early in that race and ended up losing by a neck at the line to a Florida-bred horse called Hail To All. “It was completely my fault,” Turcotte said. “I knew the horse’s fitness and all that, and I should have waited a little bit longer, and I got the horse beat. I don’t know if I was one of the best (that year), but the best can get beat the same way.”

 Whew. So he admitted … yup … admitted … he was the reason he lost.

Yikes. Imagine that. That’s integrity.

Almost all in the horse racing industry said Turcotte’s unimpeachable integrity may be his most defining and notable distinction. Not competitiveness. Not wins or losses. Integrity.

Well. I think everything else I have written about Life and horse racing is almost irrelevant compared to that last thought.

Unimpeachable integrity.

Opportunities exists and, frankly, the majority of us will almost always feel like we have missed opportunities, messed up opportunities or even believe opportunities missed us in favor of other people. That said. Life, as it should be lived, is always grounded in unimpeachable integrity.

Feel fortunate with the opportunities you get and treat each opportunity with unimpeachable integrity and I imagine you will live a good Life.