==============

“You know, when I sit in meetings and things are very tense and people take things extremely seriously and they invest a lot of their ego, I sometimes think to myself, ‘Come on, you know, there’s life and there’s death and there is love.’

And all of that ego business is nonsense compared to that.”

–

Christine Lagarde

===================

“Meetings are indispensable when you don’t want to do anything.“

–

John Kenneth Galbraith

============

Meeting plans.

Plans as in walking into a meeting with a plan in mind <sometimes an agenda and sometimes a meeting strategy>.

I have been in a number lately that made me think I needed to write about meetings and as I mapped out some of my thoughts I thought I would google ‘meeting plans.’

Holy shit.

There is a shitload of incredibly bad advice online with regard to business meetings, managing meetings and what you should do when meetings start going bad. What makes all of this already bad advice even worse is the truth  that meetings rarely goes as planned. Ok. Not ‘rarely’ … let’s say ‘never.’ So if you are going to judge your meeting against some master plan you’ve developed, some agenda and desired objectives you may as well go home now and start drinking.

Now.

That isn’t to say you shouldn’t have a plan. Or have an agenda. Or even some specific objectives for a meeting. There are clearly some basics everyone should do <or it would be considered business malpractice> with regard to any business meeting:

    Have a clear idea of why you want to have the meeting.

    Define an objective for the meeting.

    Develop an agenda, even if it’s loose and only in your head.

    Have an idea of what you want to get out of the meeting.

    Know the critical things you want to say, communicate, or ask.

But, that said, the best meetings don’t follow the plan they become a little more dynamic moving beyond the simple construct of “how it was supposed to go.’

Here is a business truth.

Good meetings, more often than not, are like herding squirrels.

On the other hand.

Bad meetings, more often than not, are like herding dead people.

Yeah. Not a lot of people talk about it but meetings that tightly follow an agenda and do not foster a little bit of heated/passionate discussion & debate are more likely to be a bad meeting than a good meeting <either that or bad unthinking people were in the meeting>.

In good meetings people have very different views about the topic. They offer a lot of ideas. Sure. The ideas can be all over the place but … well … ideas are ideas and involvement is good. this means that often a good meeting organically grows & shrinks … and let me tell you … I have never seen a meeting plan or agenda which said “grow here” and “shrink here.”

Now.

The other thing that affects meeting plans is meeting pacing. A meeting can lull you into complacency, it’s moving along smoothly and then, uh oh, somehow some shit appeared and hit the only fan in the room. Ok. Maybe not ‘shit’ but the meeting obviously shifts – gears & direction. I would note here that good meetings rarely move along in one gear. They shift gears. Oh. And they shift lanes.

Yeah.

This is certainly a point in which the meeting can become dangerous and, yes, it can certainly become an emotional/ego mind field and, yes, it is bad if it becomes a demolition derby <I called this ‘managing meeting pivots‘ in my meeting trap post>. But even with all of that … it doesn’t mean the meeting has ‘gone wrong.’

Or that anyone has done anything wrong in the ‘planning.’ It just means that the meeting has some life <which is good … and beats the alternative>.

Anyway.

Good meetings tend to have two things <even if the plan goes awry>:

1. Closure

It doesn’t have to be closure on whatever it is the meeting was about.

It doesn’t even have to be closure on a ‘list of things to do.’ You just need some closure on something. A good meeting just needs some type of closure on something so that everyone can walk away feeling like something was accomplished.

This is value confirmation. If there is no closure there is no value <and you won’t care about part 2 of what I am going to say — the story>. By the way, ‘another meeting’ is not closure. In fact … that, in and of itself, confirms lack of closure. Never agree to another meeting unless it follows “okay, we agreed to do this, this and this … and we will have another meeting on this & this.”

Never walk away from a meeting without some closure on something. Never.

2. The story.

No one should misconstrue this thought as “developing a story for the meeting” in your planning <because you should avoid wasting energy thinking about that … with some rare exceptions>. This is … well … what’s the story from the meeting.

This is also more important than a shitload of people think it is.

Thinking about it while you are in the meeting <or at least being aware of it> means you will decide to not argue & fight &correct every single thing in a meeting.

Thinking about it means you will decide to ‘never interrupt the enemy when they are making a mistake” <Napoleon>.

Thinking about it means you prioritize what is important as it is being discussed in the here & now <and not because you thought it was going to be important before the meeting>.

Thinking about it means you recognize that a meeting is less memorable just because you had some ‘closure items’ … and more memorable for something else.

Closure items confirm value in a meeting.

The story creates the memory/take away.

Think of this as if the press were covering the meeting — what would be the headline and story the next day. Don’t laugh at this thought. Meetings live on way beyond the time everyone gets up and leaves. The better you are at defining the story the better your meetings will be perceived <and talked about>.

Now.

What is the best thing about these two particular ideas? They adapt to the meeting, they are not defined in some meeting plan.

Look.

All meetings have a plan and almost all meetings have their plan fall apart.

And when it does start falling apart the initial feeling is most often a sick, sinking feeling. You know that you are not the only one sitting there going ‘what is going on … and … we’re not making any progress.’

The good news? You are not the only one feeling it.

The bad news? You are most likely partially responsible for the debacle.

Inevitably someone, maybe even you, will choose to change some dynamic in the meeting … maybe switch it up a little, switch gears or switch topics. And by altering the flow of the meeting the agenda, the plan, either adapts or gets destroyed … or worse … ignores the realities taking place in a meeting and constricts it. And maybe it is that last point that makes some rigid meeting plan of action/engagement so silly. A plan lives in some speculative reality, the meeting itself depicts reality.

I can tell you which should win.

I admit.

It drives me crazy when someone says ‘well, that didn’t go as we planned did it?’ You need to be flexible with regard to your meeting plans as well as flexible with your methods within the meeting itself.

Truth. 99% of good meetings don’t go as planned. Period.

======

“be stubborn about your goals but flexible about your methods.” the best advice I’ve ever received.

——

(via youarewortheverything)

==============

Meetings.

Rules.

Protocol.

The way things are done.

Bla bla bla bla.

Business is challenging enough without having to stick with ‘methods of what is right & wrong’ most of which are actually just simply things you ‘like or dislike.’ I say that because having the luxury of interacting with dozens of different businesses I sometimes have the opportunity to see something somewhere which reminds me that … well … I should remind someone else of something. And I just spoke with 3 young business owners yesterday about their new business.

This one has to do with meetings and managing the interaction between team members in a meeting. There are some basic business meeting truths everyone learns to accept <whether business people like the truth or not>. Suffice it to say that any time there are a bunch of people, and senior experienced people, in a business meeting you can count on it always being a maze of challenges and objectives interspersed with a nice dose of conflict of thinking & ideas.  Knowing that … most of us invest gobs of energy developing an agenda and pounding it into everyone’s head that we need to follow the agenda and say what we all agreed to say.

Generally speaking? … what a waste of good energy.

Suffice it to say the agenda, the plan, rarely survives after the initial engagement and, while the construct of the original plan of attack may remain, what happens within that construct becomes an ongoing series of mini battles of ideas, words and facts. That means, in the reality of meetings, that sometimes a lot of things said or done in a meeting are a means to an end.  And while the ‘means’ feel painful in the moment, well, in the end it was the right call.

The right decision or the right action. This is a surprisingly difficult lesson for a shitload of business people <uhm … it took me far too long to grasp it>.

Well. It is actually more difficult for older business people than younger business people. Younger business people inevitably have less rules and more worries about being & looking smart. On the other hand … older business people have more rules and, sometimes oddly, use them at the sacrifice of looking as smart as they could be.

Anyway.

This isn’t about older more experienced business people versus younger business people … this is about business meetings and management of moments and what I talked about with some business owners who didn’t really have any rules other than doing their best. And that is where talking with younger businesses is truly a joy for me. They rarely discuss status quo and rules and almost always ask me to talk about “in a meeting I want to do the right thing so how is the best way to do it.”

There are so many things that it would most likely take a Michener length book to discuss them all but I just discussed two yesterday so those are the ones I am highlighting:

• Leveraging the pronoun

You learn really early on in new business that different people see different things in meetings and most senior experienced people are smart. You also learn that younger less experienced people usually know some nuance or thought that can contribute to the discussion. This means you have a shitload of people who can contribute. This also means that inevitably in any good meeting discussions will create moments where someone wants to interject a thought. And, uh oh, they are not sure it’s a ’we’ thought or an “I” thought <we all agree versus just an interesting thought that may not align exactly with what the ‘we’ believes or wants>.

I always tell young business people … the worst thing is actually to say nothing.

Ok.

The worst thing is to say something stupid. But let’s assume it is not something stupid and it is simply a “not sure it is an I or a we thought.”

Regardless. Any good business wants someone to speak up even if they aren’t sure it fits into the “we” façade.

So you go out of your way to teach what most people call ‘leveraging the pronoun.’  You teach people to use their pronoun selectively. And experienced business people pay attention to the pronoun. The “we believes” are obvious. They are the things you have discussed beforehand or they are some basic company principles which underpin what you do and what you believe. The “I’s” are a little more difficult. Ok. A LOT more difficult.

Shit is happening in a meeting and you have something to say. You rack your brain … ‘does everyone believe this … does everyone agree … is this just my opinion … ???? <a bunch of yack, yack, yacking going on in your head>.’

I always tell young business people, in this situation, open your thought with an I. Just use “I” and share the thought. And, most importantly, don’t worry about whether the rest of your team agrees or not ... just focus on making the point as smartly and articulate as you can.

The onus is on your other team members to box it in as an “I” or convert it to a “we.”

“Well, I partially agree with Bruce and that thought … it suggests something we have discussed … “

Or

“He is correct … and …”

Or whatever you want to do and say. But as I just sat with three young business owners who think exponentially differently with several incredibly sharp employees … I was unequivocal that in their meetings situations will inevitably arise in which someone can accelerate progress or block downward turns and in either case you don’t want someone sitting on their hands trying to figure out whether everyone agrees or not.

Shift the onus onto the other members in the meeting. The other employees shouldn’t get pissed when someone does it … or scratch their head in confusion … they need to focus on leveraging the pronoun in the direction you want.

I know.

I think I just shared something kind of basic but sometimes I believe we forget to remind people of that type of shit. But when you do remind your team it frees up thinking in meetings and showcases how freely a business can navigate the strength of any business – the “I/we” dynamic. People like to know your business permits “I” to stand up and speak their mind just as much as they like, typically as a conclusion, that “we” can agree on a next step/recommendation/ POV.

Of course, I am sure I don’t need to say this <but I will anyway>, there must be balance in a meeting. It cannot be a constant “I/we” conflict, but, just for the sake of statistics let’s say that the 80/20 rule works well — 80% we and 20% I is probably the most extreme mix you want to have. Keep the “I’s” below 20 and you should be good.

Next thing you learn very early in business <and should go out of your way to teach young business people>.

• Managing the pivot

Every business meeting will demand a pivot or two. It happens. The flow of the meeting has simply gone off course, or worse, it is going in a direction which will inevitably put you in a bad spot.

So you pivot.

Oh. Unfortunately … pivots are difficult. Depending on the situation they can be impossibly difficult.

I tell people to just assume 80% of all pivots will be clumsy & awkward. The 20% elegant pivots are beautiful to watch and often so stylish they appear easy <and everyone should be able to do them> … but they are not. They are hard.

I tell all young business people to not worry about the pivot. Yeah. Of course think about it before you do it … but … getting stuck not pivoting because you aren’t sure how to do it just, more often than not, prolongs the pain in the meeting. The more important thing is managing the pivot.

I tell people to just clean it up if they want … just don’t point out how messy it was. But … what is even better? Just move on. Just like a running back in football if they make a sharp pivot they plant and accelerate. Suffice it to say the faster you accelerate out of a pivot the better off you are when it is all said & done.

By the way. That is a hard business lesson to learn. The natural instinct is to linger on the pivot and clean it up … make it look and feel less clumsy or awkward. The difficulty is that in doing so the focus remains on the wrong thing … that the pivot was clunky. Instead … if you accelerate out of the pivot 99% of the time no one invests any energy thinking back on the pivot itself … they focus on the ‘why the pivot got everyone to a good place.’

Once again … this is much more difficult than many people think.

Oh. Also.

The whole ‘awkward pivot’ thing. As I told these young business owners, when they do their post-meeting analysis they should reflect on pivots with the intent to see if there was a less awkward way <always seeking the elegant of course> but not to invest a shitload of energy reflecting. Hind sight is always 20/20 but you learn pretty quickly replicating that exact situation & context is minuscule therefore you will most likely never run into that exact same situation again.

Sure. Reflect a little.

Sure. Get bummed out it looked clumsy & awkward.

Sure. Let some people bitch & moan about how awkward & clumsy it was.

But, in the end, spend more time discussing how the pivot was managed … because, as I stated earlier, the only thing you really know for sure is that 80% of future pivots will be clumsy & awkward so rather than try and make them less clumsy & awkward it is probably a more effective use of your time to discuss how to manage it.

Anyway.

Business meetings are tough. They are tough for anyone at any experience level. I will admit that working with younger business owners and entrepreneurs when discussing new business and business meetings is fun. They are less likely to worry about rules and how things are done and all the crap that most of us older folk worry about with regard to meeting protocols. More often than not their mantra is respect for the idea & thinking & thoughts as more important than respect for a title & experience & business. Maybe it is because at that age they feel bulletproof <and we older folk forget that after being shot so many times>. But it actually seems like they have an innate understanding that the tide rises higher on the latter if they deliver on the former.

They also seem to have an innate understanding that in today’s world there is a higher value on collaboration & collaborative team thinking <even if it happens in a meeting and even if it contains some disagreement or back & forth in a meeting within team members> because it permits people to not only gain a glimpse of culture and teamwork but showcases thinking <assuming the back & forth leads to some value>. And, maybe most importantly, they seem to have a sense of fearlessness in meetings. Just in talking with these business owners as they discussed what I was telling them you could feel how it created a sense of fearlessness and freedom that no matter what mistakes they made within a meeting they could manage it.

Look.

I have always balked at ‘meeting rules’ and gravitated toward ‘meeting principles’ or ‘effective meeting tactics.’ Rules, to me, in a business meeting inherently constrict a lot of the freedom which inevitably makes for a good adaptable meeting.

……….. waitbutwhy intelligence and truth ……..

Rules constrict the methods <which can vary depending on the context and the situation> which inevitably you need to attain your objective.

I firmly believe if a business is going to demand any meeting protocol it should be built around ‘thoughtful freedom.’ By the way, none of this comes at the expense of respect for anyone in the room. Whatever is said and done should always remain respectful.

Regardless. I maybe think this way because I never ever cared if anyone in any meeting disagreed with me … at any level or title and on my team or from the ‘other side’ … if they had a good idea or a fresh view on what was being discussed … or I was wrong.

Shit.

I have been wrong so many times I am impervious to my wrongness. But, as a quasi successful business person, what I have come to realize is that as long as my rightness outweighs my wrongness I can keep my title, keep my responsibility and keep the respect of the teams around me as well as any business people I interact with.

And you know what? Young business people & owners get that. These guys did I just spoke with. And when they embrace it and do it well? Wow. Man. I would pay for a ticket to that show. That is good stuff.

==

“Once upon a time, there was a woman who discovered that she had turned into the wrong person.”

Anne Tyler

==

So.

Accountability is a surprisingly tough concept. Huh? Accountability is easy to grasp, even likable in concept, but incredibly difficult to implement.

Being accountable can be … well … gut wrenching on occasion.

And while I am tempted to write about this in a business environment … my stomach couldn’t take it today <accountability in today’s business world is stuck in the sludge at the bottom of the business moral barrel>. Instead I will talk about it within an everyday Life perspective. Personal in that while we face the day to day grind we sometimes miss out on the little accountability aspects of life that make us slip down the slope of ‘less than I wanted to be as a person.’

It happens in such small missed accountability increments that you get a little surprised when one day you look in the mirror and see you not only haven’t turned out to the be there person you meant to be, or wanted to be, you have actually turned into the wrong person. What a semi-miserable moment when you ask yourself … ‘are you pleased with what you see?’ … and the answer is … <sigh> … no. I say semi miserable because while pretty much anything you have done up to this point cannot be undone … you can certainly start doing what you want to do to begin the path to a ‘yes’ answer.

Ok. But let’s get back to the here & now and accountability.

Life doesn’t make accountability easy. Life demands constant relentless accountable moments. It is a constant day to day, moment to moment, challenge. You cannot relax for one moment.

Therefore. You have to constantly hold yourself accountable.

I know … I know … it doesn’t sound fair. You are kind of hoping Life would be more about putting yourself on the right path and assuming that if you keep putting one foot in front of the other you will just keep on down that path … and you can start looking at other things.

But you can’t. You have to constantly hold yourself accountable. I don’t have any ‘how to’ advice to offer mostly because I believe most of us know what accountability is and what it takes to be accountable.

I imagine I wrote about this because when I saw the quote I used to open this post it made me think about the constant attention accountability demands. It is the constant aggressive nature of Life itself in seeking the little moments you are not focusing on accountability … and making you pay for them. And the fact that accountability is tricky because it is not just your actions for which you may have to pay the consequences for … but also your inaction.

Yup. You are also accountable for the things you don’t do.

Accountability is really all about assuming responsibility.

Responsibility for not only being in the right place at the right time and doing the right things … but responsibility for when you are in the wrong place at the wrong time and do the wrong thing … as well as responsibility for not being ‘in place’ at all.

Shit. Accountability is tough. It is a harsh judge & jury.

All that said.

Why does this matter?

Why did I even write this post?

“… who discovered that she had turned into the wrong person.”

Turning into the wrong person is the price to be paid for not constantly holding yourself accountable.

Just ponder that thought.

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“People have forgotten this truth,” the fox said. “But you mustn’t forget it. You become responsible forever for what you’ve tamed.” 

—–

The Little Prince

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“I cannot play with you,” the fox replies. “I am not tamed.”

“What does that mean – to tame?” 

“It means to establish ties. To me, you are still nothing more than a little boy who is just like a hundred thousand other little boys. And I have no need of you. And you, on your part, have no need of me. To you, I am nothing more than a fox like a hundred thousand other foxes. But if you tame me, then we shall need each other. To me, you will be unique in all the world. To you, I shall be unique in all the world…please, tame me!”

“I want to, very much,” the Little Prince replied, “but I have not much time. I have friends to discover, and a great many things to understand.” 

“One only understands the things that one tames,” the fox said.

==============

Ok.

Some people aren’t going to like the way I am going to discuss Leadership. Some people will not like the implication behind the word “tame” with regard to employees. Those some people should read before they dismiss the thought. t may just offer a different way of thinking about the responsibility of leadership.

Leaders have a tough job in that you manage skills, people, personalities & overall organizational purpose.

We call it managing, but in reality it is taming. You tame the independent wildness and tame the ability & potential so you can understand it, and it can understand itself, so that eventually there is a mutual progress to play the game as well as it can be played.

Please note that nowhere in there have I suggested “blind obedience.” Taming, in this view, is reaching true understanding so that real personal growth occurs.

That said … in that metaphorical expression of leadership … you own what you tame.

I say that because far too often we leaders & managers view management as something we do for the benefit of the organization and, hopefully, the benefit of the people … but we ‘own’ no responsibility for the individual in terms of actions or who they become — and certainly not ‘forever.’

Some of us view ourselves as shapers in some form or fashion but lean back against the belief we only dent the surface of who and what the person is and will become. We view what we do as possibly taming but within the purview of just a chapter in their lives … not an entire story.

In some ways we do this simply as an act of self-survival. The truth is that investing too much personally into your business; the organization and the employees can … well … kill you.

Okay.

Maybe not literally kill you … but figuratively it can become a daily strain on your psychological health. Many of us, out of pragmatism, eye our relationship with employees as a story with a finite end – be it positive, sad, joyful, disappointing or ambiguous – but it is, in reality, just the end of a chapter.

The story keeps going. Ours and theirs.

And while we may represent only a chapter in a larger narrative … well … we own what we tame. This is an inclusive way of leading & managing. You include yourself in someone’s Life and … well … you own what part you tame.

Uhm.

Of course … this can also swing to the opposite more dangerous side – an exclusive leadership side. This is ‘ownership’, not owning, of what you tame. You don’t become part of them you simply offer a voice to them – I sometimes call this ‘pack mentality leadership’.

These are the leaders who say “on my team <or in other words “mine”> forever.” It is possessive in a non productive way.

“Leave and my wrath is upon you.”

That eader’s attitude? “Not want to be tamed by me? you are “un” whatever it is I stand for.” And this is where exclusive leadership truly rears its ugly head.

There is little vision, there is a lot of ‘features’ in the offering <more money, more jobs, more titles, more wins, more whatever> and therefore the incentives do the work and not any persuasive direction or vision. The ‘pack attitude’ is a means to an end and a vision in and of itself.

—-

“Managers tend to use compensation as a crutch.  After all, it is far easier to design an incentive system that will do management’s work than it is to articulate a direction persuasively, develop agreement about goals and problems, and confront difficulties when they arise.”

Michael Beer, Harvard professor of business administration

—–

The features, the actions & behavior of those who belong on this team, are how they speak of unity and teamwork, i.e., “everyone should act this way … but we are the ones who do.”

Or how about this?

“The only important thing is the unification of the people – because the other people don’t mean anything.” <Trump used these words once awhile back> In other words … the only people who truly count are the ones who are in this leader’s team.

Even worse? They use the ‘us versus them’ polarization as a means to suggest “team personality & character” all the while these types of leaders actually do it to create their own power structure. They don’t desire to include anyone else nor do they tend to reach out to others <albeit they make some inclusive noises on occasion> they desire to build a construct where people ask to join <because they should, of course, have to ask> and are not asked to join.

“Excluding leader types” love the ‘us versus them’ aspect. They love being derided and they love opposition. All these things do is solidify the team’s belief they are different & better & know more than the others. The team becomes what represents what is real & right and the leader controls what is real & right. The leader’s people are truly the only people that count and the leader hasn’t tamed ability but rather attitude.

And here is where the ownership of what you tamed hits a dangerous spot.

This leader has tamed an attitude but feels little ownership of the people themselves. Therefore should the leader decide to move on or get tired of whatever it is they are doing at the moment they feel no remorse in leaving people behind <who still harbor the attitude he/she tamed>.

The pack remains, the pack mentality still seethes, but the pack leader is no longer there.

Anyway.

Let me close with some thoughts.

I think it is a healthy thought for every manager & leader to ponder ‘you own what you tame.’ Leadership and leading is never easy and I have the scars to show to prove it.

I found it naturally tempting to build a quasi-pack mentality in my groups as a younger leader & manager. I was, and have always been, a more aggressive business person – I am not fond of status quo and not particularly fond of ‘the safe road.’

I can absolutely state that as a manager you can feed off of the ‘pack mentality’ attitude. It is exhilarating and almost like a drug … and maybe more dangerous … it can feed into a self-belief aspect that can edge upon arrogance and obliviousness to the greater good.

I don’t think I ever fell off the cliff on this but I certainly got a glimpse of the edge. As I gained more experience I saw the danger in doing so <to my team members, to my organization & to myself> and sought to find some balance.

Just remember.

You can tame your people’s ability & attitude in an inclusive & “unearthing skill & talent” way and they, and you, will benefit at the time and in the future <whether you are still working together or not>.

Just remember.

You own what you tame.

=============

“The more identities a man has, the more they express the person they conceal.”

―

John le Carré, Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy

==============

“Dr. Watson’s summary list of Sherlock Holmes’s strengths and weaknesses:

Knowledge of Literature: Nil.

Knowledge of Philosophy: Nil.

Knowledge of Astronomy: Nil.

Knowledge of Politics: Feeble.

Knowledge of Botany: Variable. Well up in belladonna, opium, and poisons generally. Knows nothing of practical gardening.

Knowledge of Geology: Practical but limited. Tells at a glance different soils from each other. After walks has shown me splashes upon his trousers, and told me by their colour and consistence in what part of London he had received them.

Knowledge of Chemistry: Profound.

Knowledge of Anatomy: Accurate but unsystematic.

Knowledge of Sensational Literature: Immense. He appears to know every detail of every horror perpetrated in the century.

Plays the violin well.

Is an expert singlestick player, boxer, and swordsman.

Has a good practical knowledge of British law.”

―

Arthur Conan Doyle <A Study in Scarlet>

==================

So.

I am not sure if it is that I am of an age where my experiences have become varied enough that I chafe on being slotted in some form of ‘what you do’ or if I am of an age where many of the people I know get frustrated that they are demanded to define themselves, careerwise, in some simplistic way.

All that said.

I found myself in an odd alternative universe writing a core “here is why I have created this site and initiative” for someone I respect … and it was written for him but easily expressed my own situation.

After I sent him what I had scribbled I went back and I replaced his field with mine and … well … I found I was writing about my frustrations were which his … as well as a number of people I know:

====================

This site is borne of my frustration with explaining I am more than an advertising guy.

This site is borne of a belief that there is a community of advertising guys/gals who not only know they are more than advertising people but they also know they would like to use the skills they have in a business world which they see as needing what they have to offer.

This site is borne of what I know to be true – many of us are not simply advertising people, we are tinkers, tailors, soldiers & spies … all in one.

For some of us it gets frustrating to explain just because I have my MBA and am an experienced advertising guy that I am more than just that.

I get frustrated when my degree defines me.

I get frustrated when my industry experience label defines what my skills are.

I get frustrated that what I do, or have tangibly done, defines what I am capable of.

I get frustrated because I know how to ask the hard questions which often offer the hardest answers – the right things to do <which I believe businesses are desperate for this skill>.

I get frustrated because I know that “the truth is” is rarely the truth and I know that truths are often misty and multiple, like ghosts.

I get frustrated because I know all that I just wrote is a reflection of a thinking skill, a problem solving skill, a business skill and not just an advertising skill.

I get frustrated because I am more than an advertising guy and I know many people are frustrated by being slotted so simplistically.

To me, the world is too quick to define people and their skills in a simplistic way — simplistically by what they do <on the surface> and what specific skills they have acquired. People are often more complex than the labels they carry along with them and skills are often more translatable, with surprisingly positive outcomes, than many people are willing to think about.

It is our own fault because we have bludgeoned it into everyone’s head that everyone has to be a specialist or have some specific skill and, therefore, if you cannot simply define your specialty or skill you are … well … of less worth than someone who can.

That is, frankly, silly if not ludicrous.

Here is what I know.

I am more than an advertising guy. I am a tinker, tailor soldier and spy.

And I am building a community of likeminded people with a desire to go beyond simply being defined by the degree they earned and what labels people put on them to reach out into a business world, which may not know they need our skills at the moment, and show them there is a group of overlooked people who have skills to offer which businesses can benefit from.

============

tin·ker

ˈtiNGkər/

noun: tinker; plural noun: tinkers

    1.

    (especially in former times) a person who travels from place to place mending metal utensils as a way of making a living.

        a person who makes minor mechanical repairs, especially on a variety of appliances and apparatuses, usually for a living.

2.

    an act of attempting to repair something.

tai·lor

ˈtālər/

noun: tailor; plural noun: tailors

    1.

    a person whose occupation is making fitted clothes such as suits, pants, and jackets to fit individual customers.

Soldier

Noun

A soldier is one who fights as part of an organised, land based, sea based and air based armed force.

spy

spī/

noun: spy; plural noun: spies

    1.

    a person who secretly collects and reports information on the activities, movements, and plans of an enemy or competitor.

=============

Sigh.

I am fairly sure I am not in the majority in that the bulk of the world tends to acquire specific skills but I do believe the majority of generalists get unfairly squeezed into some incredibly uncomfortable boxes simply because the world just doesn’t seem to believe a generalist has the same value as a specialist.

It is frustrating.

To be clear … a qualified generalist doesn’t claim to be able to do everything.

I am not qualified to be a CFO <although I understand what CFOs do and what they say>.

I am not qualified to be some social media strategist <although I understand what they do and what they say>.

I am not qualified to … well … you get the point.

But from a generalist perspective I am qualified to talk about effective marketing, advertising and communications in any industry <even if I have never worked specifically in that industry>.

But from a generalist perspective I am qualified to talk about effective company vision, objectives, strategies and how to grow sales & retention in any industry <even if I have never worked specifically in that industry>.

But from a generalist perspective I am qualified to talk about positioning products & services, behavioral economics, the emotional & functional reasons people do things as well as using those things in making the hard business decisions which guide businesses toward success in any industry <even if I have never worked specifically in that industry>.

But from a generalist perspective I am qualified to dabble in almost any topic in any industry on any issue and use that ‘dabbling’ to make some relevant points based on some seemingly disparate type knowledge.

===============

“You know about fixing cars, you’re athletic, and you know when to shut up.”

“That last one isn’t a skill.”

“Honey, trust me. It’s a skill.” 

―

Simone Elkeles

============

Anyway.

Tinker tailor soldier spy.

I like that title.

A little bit of this in a lot of ‘that.’

I am tinker, tailor, soldier & spy.

=============

“We should place confidence in our employee.

Confidence is the foundation of friendship.

If we give it, we will receive it.

Any person in a managerial position, from supervisor to president, who feels that his employee is basically not as good as he is and who suspects his employee is always trying to put something over on him, lacks the necessary qualities for human leadership – to say nothing of human friendship.”

—–

Harry Humphreys

============

“The conventional definition of management is getting work done through people, but real management is developing people through work.”

—-

Agha Abedi

=============

Well.

Leading and managing people is possibly one of the most rewarding things you can do in a business career.

Firing people is possibly one of the most unrewarding things you can do in a business career.

Unfortunately these two things are inextricably linked.

I could argue that once you assume responsibility for firing someone … you learn more about yourself, and I imagine others learn about you, than from almost any other responsibility you assume as a leader.

No one likes firing people. Well. No one who is any good at business leadership. I don’t care if you absolutely hate the person you are firing, if the person has actually committed a fireable offense and you are in the right to fire them, or even if you fire someone for good reason … suffice it to say … it never feels good to fire someone.

And because of that … a good business leader never delegates the tough termination. And they never send someone to terminate a direct report.

Generally speaking … you fire anyone who is a direct report, or you were directly responsive for hiring, face to face.

Yeah.

This may not be, logistically, the easiest thing to do but it is part of the burden of responsibility. It is the mantle you wear and it is what you are obligated to offer the person being terminated – dignity & respect.

Anything less than that and you are shirking your responsibility.  Anything less than that is … well … chicken shit. And you are a chickenshit business leader if you do not do these things.

Sure.

What I just shared is a hard lesson but one business people learn in young management.

I will never forget the first person I ever fired. Paul.

An absolute great guy in absolutely the wrong position and possibly career. But that doesn’t mean it was easy to terminate him. While I was 99% sure it was the right thing to do <and my boss and her bosses agreed> there was an extraordinarily loud 1% in my head that kept me awake that night.

Inevitably he chose a different career and went on to become an SVP of sales.

And he was kind enough to drop me a couple of notes to tell me it all worked out for the best.

But I will never forget firing him. I can honestly say I never forget anyone I have fired <and that is a semi-long list after years of management>.

However.

I would like to think my leadership career is measured more by the people I did not fire.

Not firing, in a larger organization, can be harder than you think.

I think I spent more time explaining to the most senior people why I would not fire some of the people I managed than I did ever discussing almost anything else about employees with them.

Well. That is … it felt that way.

The crap that floats upwards into senior leadership about individual employees is amazing. The littlest mistakes and quirks seem to take on exponential size when it arrives at the most senior people — and they do not hesitate to share their disproportional views.

Regardless. All of those views cut into the ‘trust belief’ … are they respected within the organization, do they have the trust of the organization and can they be trusted with their responsibility.

And that is when you earn your stripes as a manager. You do not cave in to the ‘easy thing to do’ but rather stand up for your people and let the chips fall as they may. Oh. And you learn it is totally worth it to not take the easy way out.

Let me be clear.

No one is perfect. I was not a perfect employee nor was a perfect manager. And, yet, when judging employees there sometimes is the ‘perfect measure’ of which becomes the absurd standard.

Yes.

We should judge senior people more critically but we should judge them fairly.

Anyway.

I didn’t fire a lot of people. And I can think of at least 4 who made me incredibly proud that I didn’t … despite some pressure from others to do so.

All 4 of these have sent me notes at different points, not thanking me for not firing them but rather for simply giving them a chance, believing in them and seeing something in them that they knew <because all employees know when they are under ‘the human resources microscope’>  many others didn’t.

All 4 of them have been professionally successful and, more importantly, are solid good human beings. Neither of those are because I didn’t fire them but rather vindicate the non-firing decision.

All that said.

Firing someone, despite the pain of actually doing it, is often the easy way out and is certainly a way to avoid looking at your own flaws.

Flaws? I sometimes believe one of the hardest things you can learn in your career is that your best is not particularly special.

Learning the fact that your talent, in reality, is matched by a shitload of people.

Learning that your best is relatively easily matched by a shitload of people.

It is an unfortunate truth that:

• Talent is talent.
• Smarts are smarts.
• And expertise is almost always relative.

At any given point in Life and your career you can look around you and, if you are self aware, you will note you are rarely the most talented, rarely the smartest one in the room and rarely the only expert.

Even on your best day you may not actually be the best.

I imagine that is a tough thing to get your head wrapped around.

But I also imagine if you do wrap your head around it evaluating employees and how you fire them is affected.

I always watch how someone terminates an employee.

You can learn a lot about people in that situation … and you can learn a shitload about how someone feels about dignity, respect and responsibility in how they terminate an employee.

===========

Postscript 1: under the general heading of “chickenshit” from a business perspective I will comment on a Trump firing:

There are hundreds of different viable reasons to fire someone and if you have the responsibility to hire & fire and it is ‘at will’ you can do what you want. But HOW Trump fired James Comey was chickenshit.

It wasn’t face to face with a direct report <or even face to face with anyone … just a letter delivered by a non-government employee>.

While there appeared to be no sense of urgency to terminate the action was taken with an absurd sense of senseless urgency which permitted Comey the indignity of being blindsided, in the middle of a commitment to the people who reported to him and not even in town.

This was a chicken shit way of terminating an honorable employee. It is indicative of Trump’s lack of character.

Postscript 2: Under the general heading of “this is some crazy shit” from a business perspective:

Firing someone for lack of confidence when the people who you are actually working for have a general lack of confidence in you is slightly surreal.

This may actually be the ironic point of this little postscript rant.

The stated “Donald J Trump fired his FBI Director because of ‘lack of confidence’ is … well … crazy shit.

Well. If that is a true criteria and I were to look at some national polling data I could argue Trump could be fired on the same criteria by the American people.

Most leaders do not defend their firing decision through childish name calling.

“Crying Chuck” .. “Richie” in quotes <instead of Richard>. Calling people diminishing names. Childish crap like that. I have been criticized as a leader for people I have fired, as well as people who I didn’t fire, and when appropriate I responded with some “why I did it” information but I never deflected my choice & decision onto others by suggesting they were not qualified to criticize … and I certainly always treated peers with a modicum of respect.

Tweet response rather than standing up in person

Sniping from the sidelines is not leadership.

Period.

‘nuf said.

==================

“Every normal man must be tempted at times to spit upon his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin slitting throats.”

–

H.L. Mencken

==============

So.

This is about standing up for what you believe in <not really about being a pirate>. This is about business. And, sometimes, I imagine some of my thoughts are also about Life.

In fact.

This is about several things:

–          Not always being politically correct

–          Possibly not ‘playing nice’

–          Sacrificing some ‘art of compromise’

–          Being a pirate <yeah … I lied … it is partially about being a pirate>

Alrighty. Before I get to the fun part <slitting throats> … let me tell you how this quote is about business. Because the quote suggests that everyone … even a normal <or quasi sensible> person … is tempted to become a pirate <raise the black flag> and kill <hopefully not literally> conformity, the status quo and those things that may dull the edges in business <and life>.

Now.

This isn’t about making being a pirate a living/career, or a way of life, but rather this is more about suggesting some situations in which you are tempted to pillage all that around you, take no prisoners and get it done your way. Ok. Maybe some situations where being ‘pirate-like’ can benefit you in business.

That said.

Here are the things to think about.

Not being politically correct

Hoisting the black flag in business means you are gonna say and do some things that well behaved polite business people just may not like. In fact … it even means going out on your own, hopefully not on the plank, and sailing independently outside the conformity of what is said to be ‘right.’

Well.

Pirates were entrepreneurs. Pirates got things done fast <or faster than going through bureaucracy of some management>.

The prizes were great.

The losses were mind numbingly abrupt and conclusive.

It is often a business truth that wading your way through all the politically correct steps takes time and can sap energy. Sometimes you gotta simply say “I am a pirate … my crew will look motley … and I am abrasive myself … but this ship is gonna sail today with all those who want to hoist the black flag.”

Now.

You cannot be politically incorrect all the time … that would make you a bigot, ignorant, an asshole … and/or simply stupid <in other words … a bad pirate>. However. Selectively avoiding correctness can cut through bullshit and get the ship out of the harbor.

Oh.

And put you in a position to win a prize. Or get sunk.

But that’s the risk a pirate runs.

Not playing nice.

Being a pirate in business isn’t like playing cricket <as the British would say>. Hoyle isn’t giving everyone the rules.

Pirates cared about one thing … okay … two things.

• Booty <winning the prize>
• Not dying.

Good pirates constantly balanced between the 2. This insured they didn’t do something so incredibly stupid that their <your> own throat wasn’t slit but also insured enough risk to get what you wanted.

It also meant rules were vague at best. I am not suggesting someone be immoral or so ruthless that the integrity of the organization is compromised.

But.

To win there is a loser. And pirates didn’t let the feelings of the loser affect how they played the game. They didn’t care about playing nice. They played to win, get some loot and not get killed. This kind of attitude threaded into how you approach business just ain’t a particularly bad thing.

Sacrificing the art of compromise.

Pirates don’t compromise. They cannot.

It is about winning on their terms or losing on their terms.

Why?

Because if they don’t win they hang.

So what does that mean?

Hang compromise out to dry. Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do to win the battle. Uhm. Sometimes. This advice is a contextual ‘pick your battle’ thought.

I am not suggesting cheating.

I am not suggesting lying.

I am not suggesting anything nefarious.

I am simply suggesting that negotiating and compromising may need to be sacrificed <on occasion> in order to do what is right. And sometimes it is a truth that there is a better, if not actually best, way of doing something.

Slit the throats of compromise and do it ‘your way.’ It is kind of an all or nothing plan of action.

Oh.

Kind of like being a pirate.

Being a pirate.

No … I am not suggesting you get to wear the cool looking black eye patch or say “aargh matey” but this is about sailing the open seas, being swashbuckling and seeking booty <gold and jewels … not the other type>.

Let’s call it … well … maybe independence. And gathering those around you who want to sail off alone just this once <at least>.

Great leaders are often like the great frigate captains of the old British navy <who were kind of like pirates within a larger organization>. They showcased an ability to effectively participate in the larger organizational activities when required … and an ability to be effective taking off on independent campaigns.

Oh.

And choosing when to be independent. No one can be a pirate 100% of the time <I don’t remember reading of many old pirates> but being a pirate every once in a while can be healthy <and fun and productive>. Individually as well as to a business and organization.

Ok.

All that said. To be clear … H.L. Mencken was an extremely cynical person, disgusted with conformity, and firm in the belief that the majority opinion was pretty much always wrong. He also tended to believe the status quo <customs and traditions > was pretty much always silly if not stupid.

I don’t agree.

Selectively … all of those things are healthy.

If you are a pirate as a standard operating procedure … you are simply an outcast <if not a bitter contrarian>. I tend to believe the type of pirate I am discussing <not a greed driven corporate blood sucking leech> is needed in today’s business world more than ever. Organizations do not encourage individuality and controlled conformity <under the guise of ‘team’> is the typical guiding principle. Boring and stagnant. That’s what I think of when I read what I just wrote.

Lastly.

While I don’t recommend being a pirate and hoisting the flag all the time … I guess I would like to remind everyone that Life is awful short … and you either have to have some fun <in business> or you have to stand up for something at some point or you are just marking time. Being a pirate now and then can remind you that individuality, or non conformity, can define you to yourself a little. It can provide some personal clarity.

Something I think we could all use a dose of on occasion.

Anyway.

I can guarantee only one thing … if you hoist the black flag at least once you will certainly have one memorable moment. Oh. And you get to be a pirate for at least one moment.

That is pretty cool all by itself.