==

“Your greatest need is to clean out the enormous mass of mental and emotional rubbish that clutters your mind.

You need to learn how to select your thoughts just the same way you select your clothes every day.

This is a power you can cultivate.

If you want to control things in your life, work on controlling your mind. In most cases, that’s the only thing you should be trying to control.”

–

Marc Hack

=================

So. Controlling things <shit>, in general, in Life, in business and, well, in everywhere I imagine, is possibly the least possible objective of all.

Yet. In some form or fashion we attempt again and again to gain & maintain some control over all the shit we are faced with day in & day out. Pragmatically this is our attempt to offer some sanity to what can seem like a fairly insanely chaotic life.

All that said. Control, for the most part, is an illusion. It is an attractive illusion, but an illusion nonetheless.

But. As the world swirls around you like a hurricane I would suggest the one thing you can control is your mind and what you think. It ain’t easy, but it is doable.

Control when you think.

Not everything takes a shitload of thinking. This is my way of suggesting overthinking is a bad thing. Uhm. So is underthinking. Controlling when you think is about “thinking just enough” – not over or under – when faced with something.  Some would call this ‘maximizing efficient thinking.’ I would simply call it learning how to not overthink or underthink something. This comes naturally to an incredibly small % of people, let’s make up a number, less than 5% of people. Haggle with that number of you would like but I offer it to make the point that the majority of people who say “I am a good thinker” <with regard to over & underthinking> are probably not.

You have to learn how to do this. My guess is even if you are a great learner no one truly becomes an expert at this.

Control how you think.

Our minds are often like people viewing an all-you-can-eat buffet table … we will inevitably gravitate to either the desserts or the prime rib. We don’t focus on the most healthy and less glamorous stuff on the table. This means you have to control not only your thoughts, but also how you think.

You have to sift through what appears attractive versus what may actually be more healthy <the ‘non-rubbish’ as it were> in order to most effectively meet the needs of the thought moment. By the way. Please note I purposefully chose effective and not efficient.  ‘When you think’ is about efficiency and ‘how you think’ is about effectiveness. This is a focus aspect of thinking. Shiny objects are shiny objects and tasty indulgent desserts are tasty indulgent desserts.

You have to learn to do this. Some people are actually very good at this. They have a knack for viewing everything all at once and have an ability to discern the less important from the most important without being distracted by shiny and tasty things. please note “some.” Not a lot. Not many. Some. You can learn to be better at this but unless you have the innate instincts you will just be good at it and not great at it.

Control how you select your thoughts.

Ah. Once you have focused you have to select some thoughts to craft your decision, choice & conclusion. This point kind of circles back to underthinking & overthinking.  If you suck at controlling how you select thoughts, you will invariably end up mired in overthinking shit <because you chose the wrong things and got bogged down in a less-than-conclusive spot> or underthinking shit <because you found an attractive thought which seemingly, in some linear way, suggested “that’s it!”>.

We all have a rolodex of thoughts in our minds that we have accumulated over time through whatever experiences we have had. Inevitably the mind, in its wily way, flips through it for you and shoves a thought or two to the forefront – immediately. Some people call this ‘instincts.’ I call it dangerous.

The subconscious can be wrong as often as it is right. Unfortunately you have to force thinking at this stage. Dive a little deeper than your initial “oh, that’s it.” This is absolutely learnable. Unfortunately today’s world doesn’t exactly encourage us to force thinking and learn to do this. We encourage instincts & speed above all.

That is unfortunate.

That is dangerous.

That is unlearnable <you can unlearn this> … and controlling how you select your thoughts IS learnable.

Lastly.

Disconnecting. It would seem fairly obvious that if you want to increase control you would decrease distractions. And, in general, that is a fairly safe formula.

But, I admit, I am not a disconnecting <from twitter, facebook, social media, internet … any escapism > fan. I am not because, if you buy into what I shared above, that is simply avoiding some possibly valuable inputs into your thinking for the sake of, well, thinking. It seems to me that controlling my own mind has less to do with managing external stimuli and more to do with HOW I manage incoming external stimuli.

Just to finish this whole thought. I do believe we spend far too much time talking about distractions and how smartphones are decreasing attention spans and how the external world is killing true thinking. The only thing killing true thinking is us … people … the individual and how the individual decides, or doesn’t decide, how to think.

I imagine I am talking about personal responsibility in some form or fashion. In a world in which we do seem to spend an inordinate amount of time blaming a whole bunch of shit on someone other than ourselves it really does seem like we should spend more time talking about how we can assume more responsibility for how we think, what we think and learning to think.

But that’s me.

=====

“The fate of this man or that man was less than a drop, although it was a sparkling one, in the great blue motion of the sunlit sea.”

—

T. H. White

<The Once and Future King>

====

“The death of one man is a tragedy.

The death of millions is a statistic.”

—

Joseph Stalin

==

Ok. I imagine we have all discussed at one time or another the question:“is what I do going to really matter?”

In a world of billions and countries of hundreds of millions it is fairly easy to fall back to ‘do nothing’ because ‘doing something’ doesn’t matter.

We look around and see all the statistics & research and see … well … an overwhelming ‘nothing.’

Sure.

Sometimes we feel despair and sometimes we wonder why it happens or why someone didn’t do something or, well, why, why, why.

Sometimes we see statistics and say ‘why should I do something?’ because it all feels this is “bigger than I.”

It is hard to see that all of us matter and that everything we do matters and doing something that matters, well, matters.

But it does.

One person can be a tragedy … or a victory.

One persons’ fate … even in an ocean of people … is a drop with ripples.

The fate of One can impact the ultimate fate of many.

I can give you a gazillion examples of how & when this has happened, but I would imagine you have been bludgeoned with those examples so many times your only response is:

–  Not me, not my life

or

–  Someone else will be that one

I have no real words of wisdom to convince you that your fate, the fate of one, not only matters but could actually be the one that matters.

The only words I have are to say ‘it is so.’

While each of us singly seems so small, just a pebble, we are pebbles dropped into the sea of Life from which ripples reach far & wide in places we have yet to see and may never even see.

In addition, as a pebble we are constantly dropping into this metaphorical sea of Life again and again and again.

Moment after moment after moment.

And maybe that is why we so often feel so insignificant. This multi dimensional interconnected somewhat random  interaction with Life in which some ripple effects somewhere & someone we may never even meet can be an overwhelmingly small but big thing to warp our heads around.

Suffice it to say: not all moments matter and yet all moments matter.  That is the maddening thing about Life.

You cannot know if yesterday’s moment mattered <and fate has been impacted> or if this moment matters <and fate has been impacted> or if a moment yet to occur will be the one that matters <and fate has been impacted>.

You cannot know if your fate will matter or if it will matter a lot <tone one person or to many>. All you can do is assume it does and act accordingly. Assume each day stands still in a long moving Life.

——————-

“Here among the thirty thousand days of a long life, a single day stands still.”

Donald Hall

———

The fate of one can be a tragedy or a victory but I imagine I should suggest that if you accept your fate by acting and doing what you believe is right as often as you can the ripples of your fate will impact someone somewhere positively.

I also imagine that is the largest argument for significance of one person and one act.

I also imagine that is the best argument for the fate of One.

===

“There is nothing quite so useless, as doing with great efficiency, something that should not be done at all.”

―

Peter F. Drucker

===

“Efficiency is doing the thing right.

Effectiveness is doing the right thing.”

―

Peter F. Drucker

===

Well. It took me far too long to recognize why Bernie Sanders is appealing to young people so much.

I knew it wasn’t “free” or any version of entitlement because while that may attract people it doesn’t create passion.

I knew it wasn’t “revolution” because while that generates passion in the young <it is associated with overturning status quo> it isn’t grounded in the kind of realism which creates a true active & involved following.

I knew it wasn’t simply that the system is “rigged” because while that generates some anger or frustration it doesn’t generate the ‘measured optimism’ you feel from younger people.

I also knew the empty criticisms of the young of being lazy, entitled, idealistic, pampered, naïve … are 99% bullshit.

So while Bernie can sometimes feel a little like the Pied Piper I knew there was something deeper.

The deeper ‘thing’ happening is something I have written about ad nausea and believe is what is creating conflict in the business world.  It is what the younger generation wants to embrace in business and career versus what the older generation sees as the way to conduct business and what is important in a career.

Yeah. We seem to forget that each generation creates their own imprint – on society, on culture, on values … and, yes, on business.

My generation was about “efficiency dollars.” How could we squeeze every dollar out of a business with the least resources. We squeezed quality and effectiveness under the scrutiny of efficiency.

The generation before me was about “maximizing quality dollars.” This was about bloated profit margins and charging for high quality output <whether it was actually high quality or not>.

This younger generation sees their own version of business <I speculate it is the “added value dollar” management>. They seek ‘effectiveness’ as defined by Drucker. We may confuse this with ‘having a purpose’ or ‘something bigger’ or , as Bernie suggests, ‘less idolatry of money’, but it is more that younger people want to work in a world which values doing the right thing while making money and less about meaningless material shit.

Now. This doesn’t mean they don’t want to make money. This doesn’t mean that they don’t like money.

It just means they view the business world they want to work in as one doing the right thing versus doing something simply to make money.

This is not a revolution. This is simply a generation standing up and saying ‘here is how we wish the world would view success.’

There may be an ‘anti-establishment’ aspect to what is going on but I would argue it is less about government and less about a ‘rigged system’ and more about a desire to create the system they envision as better than what is. And while Sanders is tactically impractical and offers some unachievable things which are counter to American culture & existing behavior he does offer a vision of a world which the young could embrace … rather than the current world in which the 50somethings are beating the crap out of their hopes and ‘business and career everyday conduct’ desires

The change that this younger generation seeks certainly has some societal aspects but they realistically understand that 80% of their lives is made up of their life in the working world. They also realize, and rightly believe, that if they could conduct business the way they believe it should be conducted that many of the issues we face will inevitably be resolved.

I would guess if asked in one-on-one interviews the young people following Bernie could give a shit if we break up the big banks or big business or even Wall Street. They envision change would occur if they actually were in positions WITHIN the system to create the desired behavior.

They want a chance to do it their way.

Personally? I want them to have a chance to do it their way.

And, yet, they need to understand that the lure of money is corruptive – to a business and to each individual’s moral imperative.

“Few people- and probably no one outside the executive suite – sees much reason for the very large executive compensations. There is little correlation between them and company performance.”

Peter F. Drucker, The Frontiers of Management (1986).

Drucker, in The Frontiers of Management (1986), described this as the “Greed Effect” <he also discussed this in terms of economic salvation in 1989 New Realities>.

To be clear, greed is an easy thing to conceptually dismiss but incredibly difficult to practically fend off as more & more money <and your lifestyle changes with the more money> enters into your Life equation.

Where I think the younger generation may be slightly naïve is to not understand that.

And I think Bernie is extremely naïve on this <mostly because he doesn’t have any business experience>.

Money is here to stay. And the desire to make money & have money is productive — when well managed.

To me there needs to be a shift not in the system but in the heads & hearts of the participants – leaders & employees.

And that is where I saw a difference between Bernie & Hillary in 2016 (and I imagine someone in 2020 will draw a comparison).

Bernie doesn’t know diddleysquat about business but his personal issue, idolizing money is bad, coincides with the younger generation’s belief that there has to be more to life than making gobs of money and going into business every day being measured on outcomes <rather than what is the right thing to do>.

He empowers them to believe they will someday be in control of the business world and can solve it themselves <not the government>.

Hillary also doesn’t know diddleysquat about business but her personal issue, removing problems/barriers, not only does not coincide with the younger generation’s attitudes but also does not appeal to what every business person knows …  “results are obtained by exploiting opportunities, not by solving problems.” <Peter F. Drucker>. She does not inspire empowerment but rather offers government solutions to enable an individual to be less constricted with regard to opportunity.

One suggests you will be able to take the bull by the horns <”because I believe you are capable to do so”>.

One suggests we will fence in the bulls <”because I believe if the bulls are gone you are freer”>.

Both are good solutions, but younger people are more apt to be full of piss & vinegar and will take the former over the latter. That is <mainly> why young people follow Bernie.

Look. I do think a successful business needs compensation as a reward and incentive and that they should be directly tied to the achievement of objectives <or progress>. And I do believe that compensation systems should not be so rigid as to exclude special rewards for “performance over and above the call of duty.”

But I do believe that each business generation arm wrestles the torch from the prior business generations as they create the business environment they envision and the objectives can change therefore the compensation rewards would inevitably change.

And that is what Bernie is really tapping into. And, frankly, I agree. I just don’t agree with going about it like he is suggesting.

Making money is good.

Wanting to make money is good.

Having money is good.

Thinking about money with perspective is even ‘gooder.’

I get tired of reading over and over and over again about anger and anti-establishment and … well … everything else almost every politician or political pundit keeps blabbing about. I wish they would start discussing attitudes & behaviors and why generations are threatened and other generations are inspired to attempt change.

In the end it will not matter to America, or any country for that matter, to make some nebulous ‘political party’ unite. What will matter is to unite, or align, generations. We need the 50somethings to embrace the opportunities the 20somethings have to offer the existing powerfully effective systems and, conversely, we need the 20somethings to embrace the opportunities the 50somethings have provided them.

====

originally published April 2016

====

=====

“I’m addicted to the world’s whisper.”

———-

Patrick Madden

====

Well. Every once in a while you find some words, a quote in this case, which makes you stop and think and it reaches into your business mind and personal mind. This was one of those quotes for me.

I am an introvert at my core. I think that makes the thought of a “world’s whisper” resonate with me because, well, this may sound obvious, but the world, the people in it and the thoughts that pervade the ether of each day are fascinating.

Fascinating to me and I actually believe fascinating to a lot of people. I think we all feel that way <albeit we get scared of the exact same things on occasion> but I think introverts just listen a little more closely to the whispers..

Regardless. While it may seem everything in the world is shouting at the top of their lungs, the good stuff whispers.

I know I am addicted to the whispers.

I know I am addicted to listening for them.

And I don’t understand why more people don’t have this addiction.

And I really don’t understand it now that we have the internet.

What do I mean? In the good old days, to hear the whispers, you needed to be physically engaged. You had to travel, sit & watch, immerse yourself in what is happening. If you were even slightly introverted, it could kind of suck. At minimum, a little uncomfortable.

In the good ole ‘new’ days you can lurk <if you are introverted> and be actively involved <if you are not>. Yeah. Lurking online sounds creepy, but if it is done with the intent to listen to the whispers of the world I find it difficult to find fault in the behavior.

While people will argue with me, I would suggest that it is just as difficult to hear the whispers online as it is to hear them in the physical world. I say that because regardless of the environment you are sifting through the noise and untangling that which is unimportant and tugging at the threads of what is important.

Personally I don’t really give a shit on the environment, online/offline/noisy/silent, all I care about is leaning in closely to hear the good stuff — the whispers.

All that said. Some of you may have no clue what the fuck I am taking about.

That’s okay.

You just haven’t heard the whispers yet. If you had, you would never stop listening for them.

It s the good stuff. Its the kind of stuff worth listening to (and listening for>. I could suggest it is within the whispers that you will find what truly matters, but I am not sure I can <I don’t have empirical support/research> so all I can say is that it is the good stuff.

It is the extraordinary thread woven amongst the beautiful blanket of the everyday ordinary.

====

“The idea of the extraordinary happening in the context of the ordinary is what’s fascinating to me.“

Chris Van Allsburg
=====

And for those who haven’t heard the whispers?

It is worth trying.

You just have to listen closely. Sometimes you just have to lean into Life a little and listen just a little closer. The whispers are there and I can promise you, they are worth hearing.

————

“I’ve seen plenty of your kind … you Americans.

Refugees from that brave new world you have over there.  Pilgrims in search of your Mecca … only you have no Mecca.

You’ve rejected one world and can’t quite smuggle your way into another so you wander like lost souls among all the libraries, museums, palaces and cathedrals of Europe … never quite seeing or catching hold of anything that lies outside those musty, but god knows elegant, interiors. It’s called ‘finding oneself’ I believe … as if a self can exist at the end of some tourist’s itinerary like a pot of gold.

Yet it’s kind of a fear isn’t it? A fear of Life.”

=

Celestial chess

—

“I have a deep fear of being too much.

That one day I will find my someone, and they will realize that I am
a hurricane.

That they will step back and be intimidated by my muchness. “

=

Michelle K.

———

So. Muchness. Muchness is what resides within each one of us. The problem is Life, in general, encourage us to exhibit, well, much less. Therefore we seem to spend a lot of time in the wretched hollow between our muchness and what we believe the world can accept of our muchness. In other words, we are always seek to constrict not expand.

Oddly this creates a lot of self reflection. A lot of “who am I”, finding onself and defining what is the right level of public muchness. We search as in “as if a self can exist at the end of some tourist’s itinerary like a pot of gold.” Far too often finding one’s muchness, paradoxically, seems a lot like stagnancy. There may seem like a lot of movement in that you may be moving around a lot <going places, visiting libraries, museums, palaces and cathedrals of Europe>, but in actuality, you are stagnant … personally.

All the movement appears to be some kind of search within oneself, but you are doing it by seeking ‘out-of-self’ things. Worse? Your self search often gets judged by what cues the ‘out-of-self- things provide you. Its almost like the search makes you a refugee from yourself. You invest energy not on progress but rather in searching backwards or ‘within’ <by viewing within the past for insights> to find ‘something.’

Well. This all seems crazy to me. Seems like maybe by the time you finish your search the rest of the world has moved on by. I would suggest time may be better served by something in which typical ‘finding oneself’ discussions do not appear to encompass — the word ‘disturbing.’ As in maybe ‘disturbing oneself.’ As in disturbing the universe. Kind of like shaking the personal etch a sketch a bit and in doing so be willing to shake the societal status quo of “what you should expect” etch a sketch..

By the way, to me, the fact ‘disturbing’ rarely is included in any ‘finding oneself’ discussion is crazy. Mostly because emotion is the energy for change and I would argue emotion is the engine for muchness.

Ok. What the hell am I talking about? The roots of disturb is the latin word – Emovere.

===

<latin> emovere: to disturb

===

Emotion literally means disturbance. The word emotion comes from the Latin emovere meaning “to disturb.” Therefore, emovere can be seen as a version of how we find ourselves. A combination of emotion & disturb is the creation of one’s muchness.

Look. Disturb may sound, well, disturbing or maybe a little extreme but, what the hell, you spend gobs of energy going out and about having rejected one world and can’t quite smuggle your way into another so you wander like lost souls.

The whole idea of ‘finding oneself’ all with the overall intent to seek opportunities to find out about ourselves and discover your muchness, i.e., what we are made up of and what we can be.

Disturbing, at its core, is about shifting shit so that opportunities can be uncovered.

This leads me to a guy named Pittacus … one of the Seven Sages of Greece. While each of the seven sages was supposed to represent an edict of worldly knowledge <Solon of Athens was actually “know thyself”> it was Pittacus who proposed ‘you should know which opportunities to choose.’

—

Other Pittacus Quotes

“It is hard to be good”

“Know when to act”

“Seize Time by the forelock.”

–

Disturbing is the energy which creates opportunities <not wandering the world of libraries and museums> and then … well … you gotta know which opportunities to choose.

Shit. No wonder we decide to try and find oneself by wandering the world, it sounds a shitload easier than disturbing, recognizing opportunities, than actually knowing which opportunities to choose. In fact all that sure sounds like there is lots of room for errors or missed opportunities are even a lot of bad choices.

Well. That’s the deal if you want to find yourself and let the world see your muchness.

It ain’t easy. And there is a lot of room for mistakes and bad choices. You gotta keep your eye on the prize.

Oh shit. The prize. The prize is actually finding being oneself – being your muchness.

Now. ‘Muchness’ is a great thing for you … uhm … but can be scary for others around you.

However. Not everyone, in fact, I would suggest the majority of us never discover our maximum muchness. Most of us just find crumbs of our muchness <and are quite satisfied>.

Some of us just get a bite or two of our muchness <and that is even more satisfying>. And then there are the few who actually find ‘oneself’ and all their muchness. Which leads me back to where I opended today:

————

“I have a deep fear of being too much.

That one day I will find my someone, and they will realize that I am
a hurricane. That they will step back and be intimidated
by my muchness. “

—————–

Well. This makes me think that maybe the reason most of us go about finding ourselves the wrong way is because most of us fear becoming the hurricane we could be. Muchness is scary. Muchness is not only a little scary to ourselves but absolutely can be intimidating to others. Hence … “you can be a little too much on occasion.” Frankly, this is where it gets tricky. When you hear that you naturally pull in your muchness. Which is a little nuts. Nuts because YOU can handle your muchness its OTHERS who cannot – its their issue and not yours.

Anyway.

I imagine my real point in all of this is that while finding oneself is not easy once you embrace your muchness it gets difficult.Here’s what I do know.

—

disturb + recognize opportunities + choose the right opportunities = muchness

—

Let’s be honest. Most of us, even if we are really lucky, will only find crumbs of our muchness. Yup, even if we do most of the formula right … just crumbs. And that is manageable. And while crumbs sounds … well … crummy. It’s not. They represent glimpses of our greatness. The muchness inside us is the best of our best … the best version of I … the greatness within.

And even if we only get a glimpse of it? Well. In the immortal words of the coach in the movie The Replacements:

==

“Greatness, no matter how brief, stays with you forever.”

Gene Hackman <the replacements>

==

Finding oneself truly has to be done with some intent of finding some greatness <I mean, c’mon, why else would we invest energy doing it?>. It’s all about finding whatever glimpse of greatness, of muchness, we have within us <and most everyone has at least a glimpse>. And why wouldn’t we seek to find ‘oneself’ the right way?

Fear.

The opening quote suggested ‘a fear of Life.’ Well. I would suggest it would be more ‘a fear of Muchness’.

Regardless.

Suffice it to say that Self, or our’ muchness’, does not exist at the end of some tourist’s itinerary like a pot of gold. And that said … remember … if you truly desire to ‘find yourself’ don’t head out like a pilgrim in search of your mecca just think one word – emovere.

In other words … Disturb.

Disturb your world and your universe and watch for the opportunities and don’t fear your muchness and, mos importantly, don’t let the outside world’s fear of your muchmness make you make your much a lesser version of what it can be.

Embrace your muchness and disturb the universe. I could think of worse advice.

 (originally published January 21, 2017 after Trump inauguration & updated given consistent Trump ‘join or else’ messaging)

———————

“Authority without wisdom is like a heavy axe without an edge, fitter to bruise than polish.”

―

Anne Bradstreet

==============

……… tweet from Republican National Party on June 14, 2018 ………….

Join or Else. If there is one common theme Trump and his merry band of corrupt amoral yahoos have espoused, this is it. Yeah. They may cloak it in some vapid superficial niceties, but, in the end,  it “Join or Else.

That said. (stepping back to my words of January 2017)

———————————-

Well.

Yesterday was an interestingly disturbing day to begin “the new era of The United States of America.”

I listened to the Trump inauguration speech with growing horror. It had all the trappings of authoritarianism wrapped snugly in a blanket of patriotism & promises of wealth, security, strength and ‘greatness.’

I listened to it not just as a citizen but as a business guy.

Yeah. Populism can be seen in business just as it can be seen in politics. In business it can be called ‘the cult mentality’ and more often than not its leader is a ‘less-than-benevolent’ dictator. Let’s call it a ‘join, or else’ culture. You can drive membership in this culture a couple of ways … both grounded in fear.

Fear of losing <part 1>. Outsiders are trying to steal what is ours … people who don’t believe in what we believe in are trying to steal what is ours … join us because we are the people who count and matter.

I do not want to lose what is rightfully mine.

Fear of losing <part 2>. I am on the outside looking in and … well … holy shit … if I don’t join I am gonna lose everything <or be branded as a non joiner>.

I will join because if I don’t I am up shit creek without a paddle and lose what I have.

Businesses try this shit all the time. It is their way of building a strong culture, claiming it is inclusive, albeit inclusive is grounded by ‘a tight set of club rules.’ They will argue it is not a tight set but rather a basic construct which binds people in a good way … you call it tomato and I call it rotten. This Trump version of populism is, well, it goes beyond corporate cult culture. This version is close to being batshit crazy dangerous thought leadership.

Let’s look at the brochure and talk a minute with the Trump Club recruiter.

The cover of the brochure suggests an unstoppable America, driven solely by self-interest, in other words, our Club wins at all costs at the expense of anyone who stands in our way! <“if you want to win, join us” it says …>.

It further reads with threatening all those who might stand in the way of this Club and it’s winning/great objective. It contains an adamant stance of ‘no real choice’, i.e., a demanded unity not an asked for unity.

Yeah.

Some of the club benefits look awful good in the brochure … more & better jobs, stronger economy, stronger security, less business regulations and country pride. And then I turn over the brochure just to check out the legalese, the cost of the benefits as it were, to explore how the promises of the Club will be delivered.

The headline on the back of the brochure really wanted me to join this club … the message of “join today because today is the day the people become the rulers of this country.” I vaguely remember that being the call of the French Revolution but it sounds cool <although I could swear we, the people, have been voting in people as representatives for awhile>.

But. Whew. It sounds good. I like it.

It feels empowering and inspirational with the added comfort that I will no longer be one of “the forgotten people which will be forgotten no longer.” I know for sure that would like to not be forgotten and being part of a club would be nice and … well … gosh … uhm … now that I think about it … I didn’t know I had been forgotten.

• The recruiter leans forward and says “of course you were, the intellectual globalist elite in Washington and around the world have been keeping you down … they don’t care about you … they have forgotten that it was you that made them part of the wealthy elite.”

Ok. But didn’t your Club President build his wealth off the backs of ‘forgotten people’ and … well … it seems like they aren’t any better off but he is a shitload better off, doesn’t it?

• Oh … no, no, no … he appreciates everything they have done for him. Hey. And don’t you want to be wealthy too?

I look down at the brochure and I see the bolded ‘make wealthy’ words and have to ask the club recruiter, decked out in an ‘America first’ hat and neatly pressed ‘make America great’ uniform like shirt, I ask the recruiter … “this becoming wealthy thing … its sounds an awful lot like Amway.”

• Oh, no, it is nothing like that at all. Our Club will make everything great for everyone and you will have great opportunities to get the wealth you have always deserved, but haven’t got, because the lazy, less than hard working elite will not get it anymore … we will make sure you get your fair share. Hey. Look at this picture of the Club President in his office … check out the gold curtains … the gold rug and the gold fixtures … that is wealth. That is what you can be part of!

Oh.

• And, look, if you join today you get a hat <which you should wear as often as possible so that we can tell who is in the club and who isn’t>.

And, even better, we should have some additional pieces of apparel you can wear soon. In fact … we will have special uniforms & badges for the original club members to showcase their elite status in the club … everyone will want to wear them.

Ok. One last question … your club is “God’s chosen.” I didn’t know God chose … I thought he was all about equal among all men. Does this mean that other clubs don’t believe in God or does God just favor us? And does this mean I have to believe in your version of God and … well … what exactly is your version of God?

• “Oh.

Well.

We are a Christian based club … but of course we accept anyone. But don’t forget … Christianity, above all, outlines all the values which lead to a better version of yourself … and, well, that is what we want all Club members to be able to achieve. Everyone should have values, don’t you think?”

Whew. This is fucking crazy shit going on

To be clear. A shitload of the club leaders and followers are going to try and draw some false comparisons and equivalents to past American heroes.

To be clear. This is significantly different than Thomas Jefferson’s plea for unity in his inaugural address in 1800 — “every difference of opinion is not a difference of principle.”

The Trump club has one principle and one opinion.

There is no room for anything else. More important than color of skin, religion, gender … this may actually be my root concern with ‘the club’.

The main principle?

Believe what I believe … or you are not a true believer.

That kind of seems to be the club. Kind of an “us versus them” attitude … uhm … although us <being a US citizen> is actually also them <being US citizens>.

• “Oh no … no … why wouldn’t you believe in the United States of America if you lived in there? … everyone believes that. And if they don’t? … well … they should.”

Anyway. Oh. One last question. I didn’t hear it anywhere from the Club President or see it in the brochure … do you guys have a constitution?

• Oh, we don’t need one. We just demand a ‘total allegiance to the Club’ … oh … which believes the same things as the country wants … so you should be all for it.”

(ME) Gosh. I am not sure I can join this club … I already have a constitution I live by … and my allegiance is, first & foremost, to that and not some Club and how they think. <period … end of statement>

Look. The one thing Trump was 100% right on is that January 20, 2017 was the dawn of a new era.

“Now comes the hour of action.”

That was the call for the Trump Club. “Join or else” is what should be heard.

Just to be clear.

I am a believer in God <however you want to define it>.

I am a patriot <however you want to define it>.

I am a proud American <however you want to define it>.

But I am not joining the club called “Trump America.”

In fact … I say ‘fuck you and your fucking club.’

As for what I will do? …………….

===============

“I was not born to be forced. I will breathe after my own fashion.  Let us see who is the strongest.”

Henry David Thoreau

================================

============

“Emptiness which is conceptually liable to be mistaken for sheer nothingness is in fact the reservoir of infinite possibilities.”

——-

D.T. Suzuki

=====================

“When one gets quiet, then something wakes up inside one, something happy and quiet like the stars.”

———

W. B. Yeats

==============

So. In one piece I wrote, “to do or not to do“, I offered my personal view that “I am a harsh judge on motivation for a decision” and someone asked me about that.

Well. To begin on decision motivation I would suggest that great decision making is about emptying the mind. And, no, I am not talking about stilling the mind or even uncluttering the mind. In this case it about emptying the mind of egoist <what will feed my self belief> & appearances <what will look good> & appeal <what will gain approval> type stuff.

That said.

Contrary to popular opinion being a business leader is partially a popularity contest and, thankfully, partially not. Your popularity matters in that if you are not liked at all no one wants to follow your leadership. This has to be balanced by the fact making business decisions should never, okay, rarely, be dictated by what would make you popular.

Therefore a business leader has to recognize the delineation in their mind as they ponder decisions.

In business you, of course, have to be watching employee ‘approval’ surveys and organizational cues with regard to happiness, optimism & confidence, but, you have to purposefully empty your mind of all that stuff when it comes to a business decision – in particular on bigger decisions.

Any leader with half a brain knows they must avoid reckless decisions and ineffective energy-sucking initiatives that do little but make people feel good about themselves in the moment.

Any leader with half a brain knows that a bad decision piled on top of another bad decision only deepens a precarious situation and increases the odds you get the business in a situation that has no viable path up & out of it … let alone even create a scenario in which there is actually a viable idea on how to end the slide down <this is a recognition that decisions are not transactional but rather mutually inclusive of each other>.

But that is where emptying the mind matters. The brain has to be empty of popularity or ‘what will look good’ or any egoist aspect <like “will I look strong/decisive/smart/etc.>  which inevitably try and pry their way into your thinking process.

Yeah.

Sure.

Truth is.

Optics matter.

It sucks.

But they do.

But you have to set them aside for a bit.

Because by emptying the mind you clear away the crap in order to see the ‘right decision to make’ regardless of optics, popularity or likeability.

Okay. If optics & popularity really do matter <like I said upfront>, than why do you do that?

Because the truth is that once I have the right thing to do I can dress it up in some snazzy outfit to make it, optically, look more popular and likeable. And any business leader with half a brain can do that. All this leads me back to my point about judging business leaders based on their motivation.

First.

If a leader feels boxed in, squeezed into having to make a decision, well, there is no real ‘box’ except in that persons’ head. That is a truth. Optically, from the outside looking in, people can construe a box and the leader may mentally say “shit, I am in a box of my own making and I have to do something”, but I struggle to find a situation like this in which you actually have to do something. The optics may not look so fantastic and you may take a hit on popularity, but, any leader worth half a shit knows that any box that can be built can be unbuilt.

I judge harshly those who decide to believe they are in a box they cannot unmake.

Second.

Ego. Well. Let’s just say that any business leader worth half a shit has some ego. They have to. It’s part of what makes them feel confident enough to do a job which the majority of people would hesitate to do. And with ego comes along some nasty side effects – how do people feel about me and see me. The good business leaders take what I just wrote and make it “how do people feel about my decisions and see my decision.” They stop worrying about “me” and worry more about “my decision.”

I judge harshly those who decide believing “feel about me & see me” is any part of their decision.

Now. This motivation is a tricky judgement and, as I noted in ‘to do or not do’, you cannot judge the decision because it is what it is, but should focus on the pre-decision & the post-decision behavior in order to best assess & judge a decision maker’s motivation <albeit if someone has a history of decisions made, a pattern, you can assess the ‘pre’ fairly accurately>.

Post decision behavior is typically incredibly enlightening.

Say, for example, approval is important. If that is the case then a decision rewarded with greater approval will most likely encourage future decisions.

Or maybe someone wants to look strong. If their decision is rewarded with feedback of “strength” you can almost begin expecting more of those types of decisions.

Or maybe it is likeability. If their decision is rewarded with “happier people” you can start expecting more decisions that facilitate that response.

I imagine my point here is that evaluating someone’s motivation begins and ends with an evaluation of the relationship between the words & the actions. An action can look appealing but you have to lay the words alongside and do a match. For it is within the gaps & the connections in which you can get a sense of the motivation.

You can absolutely get a sense for motivational decision cues by how a business leader describes a decision they made. Oftentimes a leader will use the words they want to hear or are important to them in how they describe what they decided … “we needed to show a sign of strength and, therefore, we decided to do ‘x’.”

That kind of crap.

Words used over and over again are the words they will incorporate into motivations for a specific decision.

To be clear. This ability to empty the mind is not easy. And its difficulty will vary by who you are – the narcissists never can and the humble will almost always. But the truly good business decision makers — the ones who make the best decisions as in “the right decisions” <as in “doing the right thing”> — will always be able to empty the mind. They will always be able to clear the bad motivations and see their way to the ‘right’ objective driven motivations.

Lastly. Philosophically I have always liked the leaders who are able to empty the mind to make decisions because, well, as the Yeats quote suggests — they are the ones most likely to see the stars too.

—

“Getting over a painful experience is like crossing monkey bars.

You have to let go at some point in order to move forward.”

=

anonymous

—

This is about business leadership but I’ll begin with business itself (because what is business leadership, but understanding the business of people).

Business: the business of monkey bars.

Business is all about monkey bars. Yes. Many people will point out its about process, systems & efficiency and they would be partially right. That’s the foundation for sustainable profitable business. But once that foundation is built, from there on out, it is about monkey bars. Now. A lot of people will not agree with me. They will be the people who see the framework as a network of highways & wireframe in which people & ideas & work traverse making right & left hand turns.

I don’t see it that way.

The process & wireframes are simply hamster wheels. Jump on and you get some speed, but no velocity. The speed & work & going around and around can make an organization feel good, feel like they’re doing a lot, but it really doesn’t get you anywhere.

Inevitably to gain some velocity, get somewhere, achieve some lift, you have to navigate the business of monkey bars. Make the leap from the lanes in your network to new place & new people. Make the leaps outside the existing wireframe to new places & ways of doing things.

Simplistically those leaps are Monkey bars: strategically, tactically, projects & people.

Simplistically those monkey bars are letting go and taking a leap of faith you will grab the next rung.

Well. There is nothing simplistic about that. Businesses don’t like making leaps and they really detest swinging out from the nice safe rung they are holding onto, letting go of a rung and grabbing onto another.

I will say whether a business detests it or not, monkey bars are not meant to hang on to just one rung. The whole idea of monkey bars is getting from one end to another swinging from one rung to another and letting of the past rung to get to the next one.

If that isn’t metaphorically what business progress is about, I do not know what is.

This leads me to Leadership.

Navigating monkey bars with people.

My favorite leadership quote is:

“Consider becoming the type of energy that no matter where you go, or who you’re with, you always add value to the spaces and lives of those around you”

I thought of that quote because that type of energy is different than the business of navigating monkey bars. Navigating monkey bars isn’t really about energy it’s about reaching across from where you are to where you need to be. Its faith. It’s risk. Its uncertainty. Its doubt.

That said. There are so many leadership views, definitions, articles, etc. your head will spin. Go on twitter, hashtag leadership and you will be barraged by a gazillion good, and not so good, leadership thoughts you will wonder which to use.

We all have our favorites. I would argue none of them matter particularly if you want to think about Monkey bars. Monkey Bars is about pragmatic progress. Not inspiration, nor energy, nor necessarily fulfilling meaning or potential, it’s about letting go and moving on.

While most Good leadership articles discuss developing ‘tools’ for the team to verify which actions have value, and, crucially, which have not (affirm & assess behavior) when it comes to Monkey bars it may be more relevant to think of Tupac: “at some point you just have to leave the pieces behind and move the fuck on.”

Monkey bars demands you empower people to move on. But it’s a different moving forward. This one isn’t about walking or taking baby steps or giant leaps, but rather about letting go and having faith you can find another thing to hold onto. And, like monkey bars, it is not just once to get to the other side but a series of ‘letting gos’ to make it where you want to go.

Which leads me to leading in a monkey bar world.

Philosophically it would be great of you, as a leader, could actually place someone’s hands on the next bar and get them going. That ain’t the way it works. A leader’s job is to encourage letting go, have some faith and grab onto the next bar <even if they aren’t sure there is a next bar or know exactly where the next bar is>. To be honest. I’m not sure if this is objection management (eliminate objections to swinging out), unstuck management (getting people to unfreeze) or fear/uncertainty management (it will be okay, there is a safety net, the next rung is solid, etc) or idea management (make the next rung look like such a great idea it actually ‘pulls’ people to swing to it) or some combination of all.

What I do know is that this type of leadership CANNOT be about control, its about faith.

People monkey bars

You are dangling by one hand and reaching for another bar and … well … there will be a moment of uncertainty and reaching. But. That’s the gig. That’s the deal.

Letting go is the monkey bars of life. Letting go also means letting go of “fear” (not sure this is the right word but let me stick with it). Letting go is a double whammy to people:

• Fear of leaving what is known & comfortable. Fear of leaving what you may be good at and what you have proven to others you can do. fear of leaving an environment in which you KNOW you can survive.
• Fear of, well, the unknown. And its 2 unknowns:
  • The space between the rungs
  • The next rung itself

Suffice it to say letting go isn’t simple. In fact, it’s exactly like the first time you try the monkey bars. It takes some faith and confidence and, ultimately, desire to just go and swing out.

—

“All the art of living lies in a fine mingling of letting go and holding on.“

Havelock Ellis

—

I have one thought for people here. You have to stop looking at the space between the bars.

It actually helps to view with things in black & whites. Fear thrives in the gray of unresolved emotion and feelings. It festers there. Eliminate it.

Process monkey bars

Process is inherently not about Monkey bars, but rather concrete solid highways. Well. At least that is the way most businesses view it. They are wrong. Most process is not linear A-B-C-D-etc, but rather solid lily pads which should be used in different configurations depending on challenge and context.

This is counterintuitive to most business people. They see iterative doing and not monkey bar doing. The truth is efficiency & effectiveness are maximized by properly utilizing the Monkey bars.

Ponder that.

I would venture to guess no business school says what I just said.

Ideas (or innovation) monkey bars

80% of innovations and ideation are iterative. They are improvements upon what is. Extensions, shifts, lifts, etc. These are like constantly tuning up the engine. 20% are monkey bar ideas and innovations. None, I may add, are out of the box ideas or innovations.

The 20%. The big ideas are swinging from a rung on a solid construct, letting go and grasping another rung across a space. The rung is separated by space, but the innovation is strong enough for the organization to hold on to. Please note. You are making a leap, but not outside a box. Please note. This actually increases likelihood of success. Just as scary (letting go and grabbing onto something you trust will hold you), yet, the leap is made within a construct the organization can withstand.

Just ponder.

I would venture to guess no innovations guru says what I just said.

In the end.

1. Business loves linear solid tidy things. they are safe, theoretically predictable and typically showcases the characteristics of efficiency. But not everything can be reduced to a 5 step process, a 6 stage model, or even a production schedule. That is why I believe the power of the Monkey bars concept is it is tangible and intangible. Where it gets interesting, is that it enables us to understand how to move away from slow and incremental improvement, to leaps of improvement.
2. People hate change (but mostly for a different reason than you may think).

“A root cause of resistance to change is that employees identify with and care for their organizations. People fear that after the change, the organization will no longer be the organization they value and identify with — and the higher the uncertainty surrounding the change, the more they anticipate such threats to the organizational identity they hold dear. Change leadership that emphasizes what is good about the envisioned change and bad about the current state of affairs typically fuels these fears because it signals that changes will be fundamental and far-reaching. Counterintuitively, then, effective change leadership has to emphasize continuity — how what is central to “who we are” as an organization will be preserved, despite the uncertainty and changes on the horizon.”

https://hbr.org/2018/08/research-to-get-people-to-embrace-change-emphasize-what-will-stay-the-same

Monkey bars maintain their structure you simply swing from one run to another. Same playground, same structure, heck, even the same kids playing with you, just another run. In overcoming resistance to change and building support for change, leaders need to communicate an appealing vision of change in combination with a vision of continuity. Unless they are able to ensure people that what defines the organization’s identity — “what makes us who we are” — will be preserved despite the changes, leaders may have to brace themselves for a wave of resistance.

So. In the end?

Letting go in business is certainly hard – and healthy.

Just be sure you don’t avoid the monkey bars because of this following thought for it would be a shame to suffer solely because it was familiar:

—

“People have a hard time letting go of their suffering.

Out of a fear of the unknown, they prefer suffering that is familiar.”

=

Thich Nhat Hanh

—

——-

“I’ve noticed something about people who make a difference in the world: They hold the unshakable conviction that individuals are extremely important, that every life matters.

They get excited over one smile.

They are willing to feed one stomach, educate one mind, and treat one wound.

They aren’t determined to revolutionize the world all at once; they’re satisfied with small changes. Over time, though, the small changes add up.   Sometimes they even transform cities and nations, and yes, the world.” 

= 

Beth Clar

——

This is about responding.

First. What does RSVP mean? In the context of social invitations RSVP is a request for a response from the invited person or people. It is derived from the French phrase répondez s’il vous plaît, meaning ‘please respond’ <”respond if you please”>.

Sticking with the formal aspect of an RSVP … there are some guidelines. 

———

If RSVP is written on an invitation it means the invited guest must tell the host whether or not they plan to attend the party.  It does not mean to respond only if you’re coming, and it does not mean respond only if you’re not coming (the expression “regrets only” is reserved for that instance).   It means the host needs to know who is going to attend, get a definite head count, the planned event … and needs it by the date specified on the invitation.

———–

Second. RSVP also has to do with Life, not just parties.

Think about it. Life, in many ways, says ‘please respond.’ My fear, and belief, is that many of us simply haven’t read the rules of etiquette and do not respond.

Look. I often write about how Life is difficult and how Life is tricky and how Life has a warped sense of humor.

But. Life can also be quite respectful and act with true etiquette and grace. I don’t mean big pomp and circumstance moments, but little moments in which doing the little things well matters. Uhm. Like an rsvp for example.

—–

“When you do something noble and beautiful and nobody notices, do not be sad. For the sun every morning is a beautiful spectacle and yet most of the audience still sleeps.”

John Lennon

—–

I sometimes worry people no longer understand what RSVP means. In social event scenarios as well as Life.

Assuming the best, and that the reason guests don’t RSVP to an invitation is a case of ignorance, not rudeness, let me suggest this.

People have a tendency to not respond because … well … it is safer.

Less chance of conflict. And it may seem like the easiest path but think about it from this quote’s perspective.

—–

“Every time we choose safety, we reinforce fear.”

Cheri Huber

—

Sure. I could simply believe most people don’t get involved with Life because they are too busy.

Or they are ignorant of the fact their absence is not noted or meaningful.

But I can’t. I can’t because I don’t believe it is true.

I think we do it, subconsciously or consciously, because it is safer — we get to avoid possible conflict.

Oh. The risk in doing this over & over & over? We become disengaged with Life.

But. Here is the good news. Life will keep sending you invitations. Over & over & over again.

You just gotta RSVP every once in a while.

To be clear. You are not always being invited to a ‘big party.’ Sometimes the RSVP is just for something small.

Saying that permits me to circle back to where I began … willing to feed one stomach, educate one mind, and treat one wound.  They aren’t determined to revolutionize the world all at once; they’re satisfied with small changes.

Over time, though, the small changes add up.

That’s why you RSVP to life.

Small changes add up.

Small moments add up.

Small gestures add up.

It is true that Life, in general, is indifferent to you and what you want. However. What Life does do is create event after event which you DO get invited to. That means its up to you to respond. And, yeah, I do believe RSVPing matters even in this scenario. Just showing up is good but not as good as telling Life you are gonna show up. Why? Because it increases the odds Life may actually NOT be indifferent when you show up.

My advice? Just make sure you RSVP to Life one response at a time.

===============

“You cannot live without establishing an equilibrium between the inner and outer.”

—–

Paul Auster

=========

“I used to think of you that way, you know. Like the sun. My own personal sun. You balanced out the clouds nicely for me.”

He sighed.

“The clouds I can handle. But I can’t fight with an eclipse.”

–

Jacob

=======

“The idea that talent is directly proportional to your trophy cabinet is one I oppose.”

—-

Alex Turner

==================

Ok. I have been extremely consistent over the years with regard to my belief that I think balance is the key to almost any successful endeavor – in life & in business.

Suffice it to say I am a big balance person. And, yet, the other day during a business discussion it occurred to me that I may not be using the right word or even have the concept correct.

I may actually be a ‘proportional’ advocate.

Let me explain. Business, more often than not, is about assessing the correct proportional value of a topic, fact or idea and assigning the correct proportional response to that value.

Sure. That may inevitably arrive at something we could call “a balanced response”, but to get to the so-called balance we need to think about proportions.

I imagine, in my head, this means we need to stop viewing things as a zero sum balance, but rather as proportional to the situation in hand.

Now. I did some research and back in 1975 a guy named Piaget described the essential characteristic of proportional reasoning as it must involve a “relationship between two relationships.” I am not really sure what that means, but I am guessing it means that proportional assumes some dimensional aspects while balance is simply a relationship between two more concrete/discrete things.

He also suggested that proportional involves something called “additive reasoning” which, to me, explained my misrepresentation of balance.

Balance suggests an either/or trade off — something like teetering on a balance beam.

Proportional suggests a more spatial trade off or, maybe, ratio based trade off. What I mean by that is I can add one thing as part of a compromise and its true value is a zillion and give up one thing as part of the same compromise and its true value is 1/10^th of a zillion (despite the fact their actual costs may be different).

I balanced my response, but gained a proportional advantage.

There is even something called ‘the constant of proportionality’, but that becomes too complicated for my pea like brain so I will let you google it and see if you can explain it.

I imagine my real point is that most of us, most likely, are proportional thinkers and not balance thinkers <although we say we are balanced>.

More often than not we invariably assess things through assimilation and the synthesis of multiple things <numbers, ratios, tangible, intangible, and … yes … even missing information & components>. Our decisions are a messy mix of analyzing a series of unequal and equal things shaping them into the proper proportions to make a, well, proportional response. This can all make sense but it doesn’t really make it any easier for us. its not easier because balance is easier to assess and judge, balance is almost always associated with ‘fair’ while proportional often looks like something won & something lost and balance gets confused with linear zero sum game decision making.

All that said. Here was the bigger epiphany to me on why we should explore the more difficult pat of proportional thinking.

While balanced may seem like a simple improper term the truth is the more one focuses on balance the higher the likelihood I would actually end up doing the wrong things.

Huh? If you focus on balance you will inevitably try and force equality in all things. That may sound good, but it ain’t really reality. Simplistically it means you are focused on the wrong outcome & objective.

Instead, if you focus on the best proportional response to every situation, you may not end up with a one-to-one balanced relationship on any one comparison you review <which creates issues in its own right>, but you will end up with a balanced relationship on any given series of comparisons.

That last paragraph may actually showcase why most people focus on balance. In a simplistic measurement business world we are almost always demanded to show one-to-one or linear explanations.

Balance does that.

Proportion does not.

This means to embrace being proportional means you will have to accept the burden of explaining the more difficult to explain, to showcase asymmetrical as actually being simple and dimensional can actually reflect symmetry. Nothing in what I just shared in that last paragraph is easy. Particularly in today’s business world.

============

“Divide the target in proportion to the available resources”
―

Sunday Adelaja

==========

All I really know is that, whether I like it or not, I am actually a proportion person and not a balance person. It only took me over 25 years in business to figure that out <no one has ever suggested I am a quick learner>.

Think about it. You may actually be a proportional person too. More importantly, maybe you should be.

============

“Whenever you take an action, decide by both your brain and heart in equal proportions. Balance them as far as possible.”
―

Bikash Bhandari

============