Enlightened Conflict

I like messy people

November 16th, 2014

messy people

“I like messy people; people who don’t fit in a box or stay between the lines, but who’s integrity is greater than any rule book and who’s loyalty is stronger than blood. “


Jim Wern






I do like messy people.

I admit that I never really thought about it until I saw the quote I opened with.





I do.


messy people pig penI like the ones who are imperfect.

I like the ones who don’t have it all figured out.

I like the ones who don’t always have a plan.

I like the ones who sometimes don’t have a really good reason for what they do.

And, yes, I do like the ones who have desks that don’t have anally aligned little piles of paper and everything in its place.



I think Life, and people, is hard on messy people.

The world, and Life, tends to judge based on appearance.




Here is the real deal about messy people. Maybe it is a Truth <maybe it’s simply a generalization>.


Messy people tend to be hard on themselves.

Their ‘mess’ is simply a reflection of the fact they are messing around with something else.


The mess is a reflection of restlessness.


The mess doesn’t mean they are really ‘a mess’ but instead they are always in motion. The mess is the dust rising from the storm that is their way of Life.


I like messy people.



“I am hard on myself. But isn’t it better to be honest about these things before someone else can use them against you?


Isn’t it better to break it yourself? “


Stephanie Perkins


Sometimes their messiness is their version of breaking themselves. Or breaking whatever is around them … the clearly defined ‘here is how it is supposed to be done as done by highly successful people’ type crap.

mess gloriousMaybe I mean they make some things a little harder for themselves.


People laugh at them because they say “if you weren’t such a mess you wouldn’t have to waste time doing that shit and instead be able to do other shit.’


Those people are wrong.


Dealing with the mess is part of the process. It is a heuristic type method that gets the head straight, the mind revved up and the adrenaline flowing.


And here is the other thing about messy people.


If you accept them … and unequivocally accept their mess … they are extraordinarily loyal and very often have some incredible intangible character muscle.

All some people see is a mess.

All I see is an interesting character.



I am biased.


I like messy people.





I know I am generalizing … but … messy people also seem happier.   Or maybe they know how to find a glimmer of happiness more easily because they realize it is somewhere in the mess <to be found> rather than built in some nice neat clean little box.


The mess may look complex and jumbled … but to them? Happiness is simple.


It just is.

It doesn’t have some nice neat definition it is just something that ‘is.’


Messy people just don’t seem to overcomplicate happiness.


“Happiness is simple.

Everything we do to find it is complicated. “


Karen Maezen Miller



messy quote

That’s it.


I like messy people.


I like people who don’t fit in a box.

I like people who don’t stay between the lines.

I like people whose integrity is greater than any rule book.

I like people whose loyalty is stronger than blood.



I admit. I didn’t plan on writing this today … but … I do like messy people.


Enlightened Conflict