on the way down

On the way down
I saw you, and you saved me from myself
And I won’t forget the way you loved me
And on the way down, I almost fell right through
But I held onto you

I’ve been wondering why it’s only me
Have you always been inside waiting to breathe?

“on the way down”, Ryan Cabrera

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This song is on one of my mp3 players. It’s a banger of a song, but it’s the words that are its special sauce.

On first listen it simply sounds like a pop love song, i.e., someone being saved from ‘the hole’ by someone. But. On second listen. Uhm. Maybe it is about self. What I mean by that is maybe “having you always been inside waiting to breathe” is something, someone, inside oneself. Maybe as you slide on the way down into that hole in life you grab onto something already inside you and in doing so you can pull yourself up – even while on the way down.

Look.

I have written about holes before.

I have written about helping someone get out of a hole.

I have never written about how being in a hole sometimes can help you find yourself – and it is actually yourself that gets you out of the hole. I have never done so because I often think (a) on your way down into a hole it is difficult to see anything about yourself clearly excepting bad, useless, shit and (b) holes are dark so all you tend to see are dark things. That said. Everyone in a hole needs to be saved. I guess the only question is does someone else save you or do you save yourself? And maybe that is why I listen to this song. You can hear it either way. And maybe it is meant to. Because the only thing for sure is holes demand saving. And it doesn’t really matter how you get out of the hole, just that you do. So, yourself, someone else, who gives a shit? On the way down, well, saving is saving. The means is irrelevant as long as the ends are met.

Ponder.