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“We continuously make promises and create agreements with ourselves and others. Some of these agreements are mutually beneficial. However, when you realize that things you agreed to in the past are no longer helpful, possible, or relevant, renegotiate. Be invested enough in your situations or relationships for renegotiation to take place.”
Susan C. Young===
“No live organism can continue for long to exist sanely under conditions of absolute reality.”
Shirley Jackson===
I have written a number of pieces on fantasy realities and the alternative universe thinking strewn throughout today’s society. Today is more about each of us, individually, and how I believe all of us are assessing our grip on reality. This isn’t about creating a fantasy thinking space, but rather assessing what we believed was reality and some of its underpinnings. Yes. Today let’s all agree on reality.
In fantasy thinking reality is an inconvenience, but in a world in which you truly see, and understand reality as it exists, you begin to noodle the inconveniences a bit more. In other words, we all begin renegotiating reality. What I mean by that is as we look around us, we note some specific aspects of reality and begin negotiating with them in our minds even with some that could be considered traditionally sacrosanct. I tend to believe we do this all the time, but the pandemic drove the thinking a bit deeper in breadth and depth. What may make this unique is that, generally speaking, everyone is doing this at the same time individually making decisions in their own minds with their own formula Life remix .. and because of that changing some of their attitudes. This doesn’t mean that most people are flipping 180 degrees on specific aspects of reality, but what it does mean is that many many people are shifting their views maybe 2 to 5 degrees. They begin seeing reality from a slightly different point of view. And not everybody is stepping to the same side or to the same degree. I say that because I know that a lot of people want to sell books and futurists want to design a future based on what they see, but not to be ironic society all the people are actually in the middle of the renegotiation process. All the books and all the futurist experts are simply guessing. They’re guessing not only how individuals are renegotiating, but they’re guessing that there will be enough renegotiations coalescing into the view that they are projecting. Once again that is a guess.
Which leads me to the renegotiation.
Questions and questioning. The depth and breadth of the questioning is mind-numbing. Does how I work make sense? Does how I live my life make sense? Do some of the decisions I have made in the past makes sense, i.e., did society truly offer paths that were in my best interest? In fact, what is in my best interest? Whom can I believe let alone trust? It doesn’t help that with 24/7 access technology it’s no longer just our eyes and ears, it’s the rise of misinformation and disinformation and lies and selective facts often leaving us feeling distant or detached from not only reality, but from ourselves mentally and physically. Each person has both, simultaneously, a reduced and expanded sense of reality. I would suggest we are revolting. Maybe not physically, but socially and culturally. The pandemic certainly gave us significant opportunities to be able to look pretty closely at our lives, how we interact with business and society, and rethink all aspects of our lives from our jobs, lifestyles, family, priorities, to how we actually would like the world around us to function. The pandemic simplistically bared all the pain points that maybe we had just ignored or were just niggling underneath the surface of life. I would suggest that all of this makes almost every single person push back in some form or fashion against the existing balances of power and rethinking the cornerstones of society and how it works. Basically, we are questioning everything and, hence, renegotiating reality here and there. The problem, at least for those in power (institutions, businesses, politicians) is that each of us are questioning in our own way, about our own aspects that bother us, and are individually arriving at answers. This is an extremely untidy thing happening across communities and societies in general. This doesn’t mean that at some point we won’t coalesce into some fairly agreeable version of how society, business and life should work, but for awhile its going to be a jumble of jagged edges. But, to be clear, institutions, businesses, the system in general, and the power structure will be resistant to losing any control and any power and will relentlessly attempt to impose its will on the people.
Which leads me, specifically, to business and capitalism.
The idea that a worker should devote their life to some institution and powering profits of a business, rewarding the executives and investors, is increasingly unpalatable to most workers. This has a cascading effect. What I mean by that is, if you start questioning climbing the corporate ladder, then you begin questioning the value of the things that in the past have been deemed important to climbing that ladder. That includes college. And if that begins happening, then the cascading questioning falls all the way down to looking at the entire system and the things that underpin the economy, work, and capitalism. We start questioning the economic system, where we belong in that system, and how that system rewards or penalizes us. Certainly, research is showing that while people may not have a positive view of capitalism, they aren’t interested in completely ditching capitalism, just questioning it and whether it does more harm than good in the world. This also has repercussions. For example, different political ideologies articulate how that comes to life in different ways Conservatives suggest that Progressives are seeking solutions in Marxism, socialism, and Communism. That’s not necessarily true. They’re just seeking solutions to what they deem as an unacceptable version of capitalism, but not seek to create a new ideology. Liberals suggest that conservatives are seeking solutions in authoritarianism to hammer down what they view as successful in the past (hence: conserving). Its kind of a hyper conservative culture version of a system of governing in society. This is actually happening. I imagine my larger point is that as we, individuals, cast about with our criticism of what exists, HOW we criticize is used as a tool to divide us. I think we need to be careful in discerning between questioning and criticizing. I say that because across the scope of liberals, conservatives, men, women, all races, we’re not only seeing questioning of the facets of life which were once considered sacrosanct, in many cases we’re actually seeing repudiation of facets of life once considered sacrosanct. We are, well, renegotiating reality.
Which leads me to say each person is plucking out aspects of the existing reality and challenging them.
This isn’t fantasy thinking and it only creates the appearances of ‘alternative universe thinking’, but, its
reality. This renegotiation process COULD affect reality and society in a whole cloth way, or it could simply be renegotiation of aspects within a larger framework of a social contract. But none of this is fantasy, none of this is alternative universe stuff, all of it is true renegotiation. It may be confusing when viewed from a meta standpoint because it is all happening at a mesa standpoint – one person at a time. Businesses hate that because they want some standardization. Institutions hate that because they want some standardization. Governments hate that because they want some standardization. And, if we are honest, communities hate that because they want some standardization. Renegotiation is a flow state and I am fairly sure no one knows where society will flow to. It’s going to be weird and fairly uncomfortable for awhile with no clear answers. But, well, that is reality. Ponder.



Well. Discussing price is always interesting. Whether it is about price in life or price as in wallet or I imagine even price of soul <head, heart, wallet>.
I say that because you do not get it back. You have sacrificed it. It is gone. You may find higher value in other ways in the exchange, but the cost to you, the expense, the sacrifice, the deal you have made, means it is expended and gone.

I have written about
to believe if you don’t figure out what to emphasize you will, well, just become numb. This is where life is particularly unforgiving. If you do not choose, Life will choose to bludgeon you day in and day out with things demanding your attention … and pain.
Success can be a, well, a deceitful sonuvabitch.
Therefore, if all I do is focus on the win I will reflect with little true critiquing and most likely remain a madman and incompetent <this is actually called
incompetence>.



The world has become a confusing swirl of realities. A mixture of fantastical thinking, alternative universes, and an absurd mix of selectively used facts/data points. The urge for clarity—for a logical articulation of what we’re experiencing, of a mosh pit of realities world suddenly beyond our understanding, is never stronger than in moments of fantasy realities. Of course, by definition, fantasy realities refuse logic, living in a space beyond comprehension, beyond reason.
Common sense got flipped on its head. Anything is possible meant it was possible. We became unshackled, free to indulge in our own opinions with fewer and fewer fetters in the forms of facts, rationality, and reason. We began creating reality out of fantasy grounded in, uhm, ‘reason.’ But this reason was grounded in our own truths which made reality something you were free to construct on your own. At some point it seems like the majority of people just rejected the claims of reason and rationality, and reality, and began to embrace fantasies. As a consequence, experts got thrown under the bus. Fantasy realities demand rejection of expertise, okay, well, the expert advice that didn’t agree with our own opinions that is. This became significantly easier to do the moment we started attaching so called experts with whatever bias we wanted to insert. We began attacking credentials and everyone was on the payroll of someone. At least in our reality so we could craft the reality we want (unfettered by facts).
Nostalgia has been turned into a pathological ideological tool. Nostalgia’s vague outlines gain mythical concreteness as we apply it to our fantasy realities. The problem with nostalgia is that its defining quirk is a weakness for illusion and delusion. As a consequence of this nostalgic whimsical thinking, we begin to believe that we have an accepted standard of reason and truth, but unfortunately a significant portion of the population actually becomes less reality based and more myth-addled. Yeah. it gets worse. Fantasy realities demand a ‘bad guy,’ an enemy, a “reason” why nostalgia isn’t exactly perfect and why the present isn’t using all the perfect nostalgia. That enemy is always tied to some mysterious manipulator. That’s bad, but even that gets worse. If manipulators lurk everywhere, well, we start believing that evil lurks everywhere. We all begin to feel like we are all holding onto an overhead hand hold on a careening driverless bus.
people with fantasy realities and those random beliefs have been incredibly resilient and enduring. They have had the ability to morph into other forms to fit into different groups as time and context have changed. This can partially be explained in that in the past (and worryingly too often in the present) most of the reality-based people typically ignored the fantastical thinking, if not were amused by it, as the quacks, charlatans and paranoid conspiracists pushed and pulled and encouraged people to believe their fantasy realities. Uh oh. Over time the quacks, charlatans and paranoid conspiracists carved out ‘believable-enough’ slivers of fantasy factions and we saw more people gravitate towards them. ‘Believable-enough’ is key here because as with most things, for every force, there is typically an equal and opposing force. In this case the slivers of fantasy realities grew as a force as the world became more complex, more un-understandable and, consequently, more difficult to explain, i.e., less believable. What were once vague unbelievable dangers now seemed very very real and believable. From those seeds grew fantasy realities. Yeah. I just rationalized fantasy realities with reason.
Which leads me to sensemaking.
Carse suggests, “the smallest unit of change is a conversation.” The more conversations that take place with regard to reality, the less likely some fantasy can impersonate reality. The social process, the conversations, make everyone an individual and, yet, part and parcel of all reality (Hanzi Freinacht calls this being a transvidual). Try this thought on for size. If we encourage sensemaking, conceptually we all become accountants. Not in the traditional sense, as in dollars and cents, but instead you keep account of political trends, ideological thinking, military actions, religious leadership, technological developments, communities, local news/activity and even the price of wool, oil, cheese, milk and tea, i.e., reality. In some way you keep account of the ten thousand threads that make up the tapestry of reality. Yes. That can sound a bit daunting. A bit overwhelming. A bit like, well, it makes fantasy realities sound a bit more appealing. I will end there because, as well know, our favorite indulgence always looks appealing – the Haagen Daz ice cream, the double chocolate cake, even the favorite brand of shoes – but we know we can’t afford it all the time because it isn’t healthy; for the body, mind or wallet. Fantasy realities are exactly the same. Appealing but unhealthy. Ponder.

The internet has eroded a sense of belonging to a large single community of humanity. I say that because society is a frame. The technology has relentlessly pried apart society, and civilization (as well as civilized thinking) so common sensemaking has less value than “I think opinions.” We have moved way beyond healthy skepticism of expert opinions to a more simplistic ‘whatever I believe is reality’ world. yeah. everyone has conflated ‘what I think’ with reality thereby encouraging everyone to not discus/debate but rather retreat to “I am happy with my opinions’ space. What this means is that while in today’s media and internet world we have far more choices than ever we see much less common information. The consequences of this less common information is that common sense making shared thinking is much less likely.
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All the while this is happening more information barrages the outline. In this barrage is a confusing mix of real, fake and quasi truths. All these confusing things do in the people’s minds is, contrary to belief, not confuse, but rather make the person more dismissive of the incoming confusion and steadier in whatever vague outline they may have constructed. The frame becomes a bit more solid.
This uncertainty is also built into the vague outlines we tend to construct for ourselves. What this means is that the construct of our beliefs and thoughts and ideas may be certain to us and, yet, its silhouette accommodates some uncertainty. Within this framework the majority of people have enough shit to do that they slot their thinking. In one slot they place unequivocal certainty type thoughts. In another slot they place the “I will always be uncertain about this shit and thank God there is someone else at some higher pay grade than I who can be certain about it.” and, lastly, we slot all the shit in which we have formed some vague outline which accommodates a certain degree of uncertainty.
While we tend to simplistically state ‘people don’t like to change,’ the reality is life is restless and “frames” are always shifting in some form or fashion. Effective framing accommodates both what exists and some of what is shifting. Vague outlines are both good and bad. Good in that they offer opportunities to expand existing mindsets, beliefs, and attitudes. Bad because if attacked most people will retreat into reduced frames of “I think-isms” realities. Once again, framing is how to effectively navigate those issues. So, yeah, framing is 90% of success. Ponder.
First. Let me say that any time a marketer can actually do something that may suggest that people are people, wherever they are, people like it.
This is the one that suggests people in cars all around the world terrorize their fellow travelers with their singing.


It probably sucks the life out of … well … life. It attempts to take the duality, or the importance thereof, out of Life.
“Dumbing up” is taking dumb, simplistic, thinking and attempting to make it look smart. While I would like to claim credit for ‘dumbing up’ it is actually the name of a World Party album.
