choices and … whatever.


“It’s not what you actually do in life that you regret just the opportunities that pass you by. It’s even in what you choose to do the opportunities you do not let pass by. In those moments it is sometimes only that you are not courageous or brave but rather you have simply exchanged one fear for another. Afraid for what we were about to do and how you will do versus the fear of what we might not do.”

Craig Johnson


This is about choices and about how we always can make choices.


Even when you feel like there is no choice, you can make a choice.

We always seem to encourage people to be flexible and adaptive in life and yet most of us fight change, or maybe better said, the choices we need to make to make change.

It is easy to be on the outside looking in at people and chastise those who we view as resistant to change and, yet, we ourselves, hesitate to make the choices we ourselves need to make.

Let’s maybe call this “fear of choice.”

Ok. I tend to believe most of what Seth Godin says is fluff.  But (to give him credit) he has noted that effective entrepreneurs and leaders often perform the same tasks as the rest of us, except for a critical 5 minutes per day. In those 5 minutes they are somehow able to cut through the thousands of possible choices and select the one choice that creates value. That, my friends, is called “lack of fear of choice.”

For most people the same thousands of choices create paralysis. And not because they aren’t capable of making A (one) choice, but because fear of any choice creates hesitation if not total ‘no decision.’

I actually believe a significant troubling issue today is all these self help books and “soup for the soul” decisionmaking formulas. The trouble? Yeah.

Because all those books won’t make the key decisions for you or show you the way. Ok.  Maybe that was harsh, but ultimately only individuals cut through the thousands of choices that face each us day in and day out and go down a path. Uhm. And there is no formula (or soup).


This is about individuals and people and the choices we make in our own lives.

This isn’t like some explorer deciding to go left when everyone else says go right.  This is about us.  You. Me. The little people.  And the choices we make or don’t make.

And fortunately for me when I write about choice I get to use my favorite word – truth.

Because often truth is about facing fear.  Because in truth there is worry and doubt and angst and uncertainty.  Bottom line? Self truth can be scary.  But self truth can also be liberating and provide direction.  I know I have read somewhere that self truth provides clarity.  Shit. I don’t know about that.  I think we all can see these things quite clearly.  All the time.

In fact that clarity is what creates the fear.

Really seeing our own reality, our doubts, our uncertainty, our whatever, and facing it can be scary.

Shedding everything and facing what may be right in front of us can create fear.

To be clear. Not fear of what we see. Fear of what we should do when we see it.

Or maybe the fear we won’t do anything at all.

I imagine we have all come close to discovering the truth several times in life but, because of fear, we  didn’t face truth.  Once again. This is not about being afraid of the truth. This is about afraid of not being able to do what needs to be done once we actually face the truth.

Let’s be honest. Generally speaking, making choices suck. Because every choice creates a result. And sometimes it is difficult to know exactly what the result will be. But (and I say but). You may not know what the result will be, but i can GUARANTEE the result will be different then what you currently are experiencing.

Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm .. but that is about change.  And this is about choices.

So. With that.  Make some choices. Start by making the easy choices if you aren’t happy with where you are in life.

Stop caring what other people think.

Be who you are.

Be with people who like who you are.

Move.  And see who moves with you (without asking).

And make choices not because you think they are good, but because they are right – for you.

Because what should overcome any fear of choice is easy to see (if you look hard enough).

What’s that? It is hope.

Hope to be better. Hope to do something else. Hope to be in a better situation.

Regardless of how crappy you feel in your current situation.

Regardless of your fear of making choices.

Regardless of everything and anything.


You should make a choice.  Or choices.  Why? Certainly not to overcome fear. Why? (I ask again) because making a choice leads you toward some hope.

Which leads me to the image to the left.

This is a 1947 book.

I elected to use this image because it is a book showcasing the unvarnished truth about one of the major trouble spots on the earth.

The borders of Poland were the giant hinges upon which Germany and Russia swung into World War 2. It is in fact their border which hinges upon Ukraine.

And maybe that is the thought for today – between fear and hope. The inner strengths and weaknesses, and choices made from those, of Poland shaped a world and world war.

It seemed fitting to use it. It seems fitting as you think about choices made, and choices to be made. Ponder.

Written by Bruce